Author Peaceandlove Posted May 4, 2009 Author Posted May 4, 2009 Well the purpose of the thread is just as a case-study- the reason I wrote him off is indeed because he came on way too strong and that can be a bit suspicious Mind you I live in Europe and this guy- guessing from the accent-was probably french especially since the area I study in is full of them...which kind of explains the camp approach wrt the scarf
refurb Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 What does "no chemistry" mean to you? No chemistry mean (to me): I've gotten to know this person reasonably well and I don't feel an overwhelming attraction. I've seen a few woman on this forum who have said "I find him attractive but there is no chemistry." WTF? RF
You'reasian Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 I've seen a few woman on this forum who have said "I find him attractive but there is no chemistry." WTF? RF What that means in girl speak (learning to interpret that language) 1. Decent looking but not in a way that turns her on (not her style) 2. She doesn't want to have sex with him
carhill Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Wild guess but attraction is the sexual/physical connection and chemistry is the emotional/intellectual/spiritual connection. Grossly (no pun intended), you can connect deeply with someone on the latter levels and have great chemistry, but find them repulsive physically.
Mahatma Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 I still approach women when I am interested. However, I will not talk about scarves with them. Totally fake in my opinion, unless the guy is gay.
Sam Spade Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Meh, what's the big deal... Pretty conventional and therefore fake approach too. Now scoring a same-day date within 5 minutes of meeting a demure girl that tries to subscribe pedestrians to charity - that's a true mastery. The trick is to be upfront about your intentions but with lots of humor about it. I can't teach it though (If you gotta ask, you ain't got it). Only the few, the proud can deliver :lmao:.
peteyj Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Why is this such a big deal? Some guy came up to you, flirted with you, asked for your number. Many guys do this all the time. Yeah the guys who are afraid of approaching might not but if you never approach a women, probably means you aren't dating. The pickup line was kind of cheesy, but nothing new there. I just don't see the point to this thread. Who knows what this guy is. He might just like flirting. I talk to random people every where I go. I like starting conversations with men and women. I'm not throwing out idiotic lines but maybe thats how this guy opens up a conversation. But look at all the idiotic female responses in this thread. The guy spoke to the OP for a few minutes, asked for her number, she refused which in most guys minds means she isn't' interested. He should have left it at that and walked away then. But I guess we now know why many women complain of 'no good men' or whatever. Because after reading these responses it's obvious why. A guy approaches a girl and half the posters think it's odd or creepy. Yeah wonder why some people complain that they can't find good dates cause they are all married or gay. Yeah if you have a few friends who are all married and you think some guy approaching you is creepy, go figure why you remain single.
fishtaco Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 I agree with peteyj. All I saw was a guy that thought you were cute and flirted with you to see if he could get a date with you. You happened to be not interested. Fine, that's cool. End of story. He didn't get offended, he didn't turn into stalker. I don't see anything wrong here. If you were interested in him, thought he was hot or whatever, you may have gone on a date with him. You seem pretty cautious, so maybe it would be a coffee shop thing where you meet up to chat a bit and see what develops. If a woman is interested in a man, even if his methodology is a bit off, she's going to cut him some slack. In fact him trying hard and coming off dorky might even appear "cute" (reverse the gender and it's true too). It's all a matter of chemistry. No chemistry here. He didn't do anything bad, you didn't do anything bad. Pat on the back all around, everyone's good.
v g Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Wild guess but attraction is the sexual/physical connection and chemistry is the emotional/intellectual/spiritual connection. Grossly (no pun intended), you can connect deeply with someone on the latter levels and have great chemistry, but find them repulsive physically. Carhill, beautifully put!
Trialbyfire Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Why is this such a big deal? Some guy came up to you, flirted with you, asked for your number. Many guys do this all the time. Yeah the guys who are afraid of approaching might not but if you never approach a women, probably means you aren't dating. The pickup line was kind of cheesy, but nothing new there. I just don't see the point to this thread. Who knows what this guy is. He might just like flirting. I talk to random people every where I go. I like starting conversations with men and women. I'm not throwing out idiotic lines but maybe thats how this guy opens up a conversation. But look at all the idiotic female responses in this thread. The guy spoke to the OP for a few minutes, asked for her number, she refused which in most guys minds means she isn't' interested. He should have left it at that and walked away then. But I guess we now know why many women complain of 'no good men' or whatever. Because after reading these responses it's obvious why. A guy approaches a girl and half the posters think it's odd or creepy. Yeah wonder why some people complain that they can't find good dates cause they are all married or gay. Yeah if you have a few friends who are all married and you think some guy approaching you is creepy, go figure why you remain single. I mean theriothly, what'ths wrong with a man talking about thcarvefths? Next time, athk her about her purthe! She'll loooveee you.
v g Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 I agree with peteyj. All I saw was a guy that thought you were cute and flirted with you to see if he could get a date with you. You happened to be not interested. Fine, that's cool. End of story. He didn't get offended, he didn't turn into stalker. I don't see anything wrong here. If you were interested in him, thought he was hot or whatever, you may have gone on a date with him. You seem pretty cautious, so maybe it would be a coffee shop thing where you meet up to chat a bit and see what develops. If a woman is interested in a man, even if his methodology is a bit off, she's going to cut him some slack. In fact him trying hard and coming off dorky might even appear "cute" (reverse the gender and it's true too). It's all a matter of chemistry. No chemistry here. He didn't do anything bad, you didn't do anything bad. Pat on the back all around, everyone's good. Fishtaco, I completely agree with you. I remember a few years ago an older man with a leisure suit and a serious necklace complete with medallion, shirt unbuttoned to his navel, sat next to me -- I was the only sober one in the bachelorette party in a casino -- and asked me, *So what's your sign?* Wow! A few minutes later he was sitting next to a woman. They were getting along fabulously. His approach had clearly worked on her. There's a lid for every pot...at least I hope so!
refurb Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Wild guess but attraction is the sexual/physical connection and chemistry is the emotional/intellectual/spiritual connection. Obviously the OP doesn't have the same definition of "chemistry" since there is no way you could form an emotional/intellectual/spiritual connection over the course of a couple minutes. RF
MN randomguy Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Looks like a PUA in training. First step is to build an immunity to rejection. I guess if he wants to be a PUA he's on his way. OP likes attention from guys and didn't have to do anything for this attention. Balls, nope. totally fake, probably feelings of inadequacy, his mom didn't pay him any attention and he's hung like a mouse. I don't get why women are so into methodology. It seems the OP liked the over the top attention, guy just wasn't hot enough.
jayOG Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Haha, despite being older... I'd say skillz, but if he was a true pimp he would have walked away with digits.
inPrismacolor Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 What I want to know is, how did you manage to see the size of his balls during all that?
Dexter Morgan Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Today I was walking in my college's grounds and a smartly dressed guy stood in front of my kinda blocking my way and complimented me on my scarf! I was taken aback, needless to say, and he went on to ask me where what it was made of- when I said cotton probably cause it was a cheap buy- he said and I quote 'a beautiful girl like you deserves silk' aaaanywayys And you didn't see much creepy about that? It smaks of such pickup lines as "did it hurt when you fell from heaven?":cool: Wow this guy did not mind putting himself out there really setting himself up for rejection (?!) and what's more he didn't look creepy What ever happened to striking up a conversation and conveying interest without some cheesy pickup line? Maybe I need to take some lessons from the players out there. I wonder if this is an interesting case-study in terms of whether this is something that this guy is used to doing and thus doesn't really care if he gets rejected, as in a que sera sera kinda way What do you guys think? for him to try to flatter you like that without simply engaging you in conversation...I don't know. I don't think players care if they get rejected. they'll just use pickup lines on the next woman. I can't believe you fell for it. I know you didn't feel any chemistry, but that pickup line got you thinking about it.
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