haagen Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I live with my boyfriend of 3 years and things are "OK". I mean we get along and everything. He works all day and is almost never home. Our sex live is not as good as it used to be. I net this guy, that is the cutest thing on this planet. He is beautiful and just amazing. I feel so good when I am with him. I have not slept with him but I really really want to. I do not want a relationship with him. I just want him for sex. What should I do?
Lucky_One Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 You should discuss your relationship with your BF. If you tell him that you are not happy with him sexually and ask him if it is ok that you just screw the cutest thing on the planet and if he says it is ok, then I am all for it! But having BTDT, cheating isn't the answer to anything. It brings lots of unhappiness and pain. But if all the parties involved are for it, and if you practice safe sex and contraception, then screwing can be fun!
TaraMaiden Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 so you are considering being a dishonest, lying, deceptive, conniving, hurtful mean person, rather than be honest, break up with your BF and live life the way you think would make everyone happier in the long run? I find these notions absolutely crazy. Why would you prefer to do the former? _/l\_
samsungxoxo Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I live with my boyfriend of 3 years and things are "OK". I mean we get along and everything. He works all day and is almost never home. Our sex live is not as good as it used to be. I net this guy, that is the cutest thing on this planet. He is beautiful and just amazing. I feel so good when I am with him. I have not slept with him but I really really want to. I do not want a relationship with him. I just want him for sex. What should I do? Unfortunately there is no two way out of this. If you don't like your sex life with your boyfriend and would rather do it with some other man then all you can do is break up with your current boyfriend as this is not really fair him. But don't cheat on him as it will only create problems and it would be a slap in the face to him. Or talk take your boyfriend to a sex therapy and over there be honest with him on what are you feeling now.
norajane Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I live with my boyfriend of 3 years and things are "OK". I mean we get along and everything. He works all day and is almost never home. Our sex live is not as good as it used to be. I net this guy, that is the cutest thing on this planet. He is beautiful and just amazing. I feel so good when I am with him. I have not slept with him but I really really want to. I do not want a relationship with him. I just want him for sex. What should I do? What do you do all day while he's working? I'd suggest that your bf might be a bit tired when he gets home from working all day, so that can put a damper on the sex life. And after 3 years, you both might be taking each other for granted and may have stopped flirting, teasing and treating each other like you're special...the romance part of your relationship may have dwindled in the mundaneness of ordinary life. You've both stopped making an effort. Do you love your bf? Want to stay in a relationship with him? Then work on your sex life together. Try taking weekends away to reconnect, or do some things to rev up your sex life. Try flirting with him all the time, and maybe plan a special evening each week where you pamper him a little with a massage or a shower together or dancing in the living room. Go out on dates with each other a few times a month. Get the romance back, and the sex life will improve. If you don't do any of that, then you're just as responsible for the bad sex life as he is. If you don't try any of that, then you're just being selfish to think you can jump into an affair and get your rocks off, while still holding on to your bf by deceiving him that everything's fine. If you try and fail, then you and your bf are probably at the end of your relationship. Break up, move out, and then start having as much sex with cute strangers as you like.
JustLooking123 Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 Do your boyfriend a favor and break up with him. Whether you cheat or not, he deserves better. The fact that you're considering this speaks volumes about your character, or lack thereof. Maybe you will eventually grow up and learn some communications skills.
Bryanp Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 How would you feel if your boyfriend was screwing another woman behind your back? What would you say if your boyfriend said he did not want a relationship with this other beautiful woman but simply wanted to just have with her behind your back? I am sure when your boyfriend finds out he will kick you our of the apartment. Maybe you should start looking for a new one now.
lkjh Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I think this is fake. If it isn't just break up with your BF
Author haagen Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 How would you feel if your boyfriend was screwing another woman behind your back? What would you say if your boyfriend said he did not want a relationship with this other beautiful woman but simply wanted to just have with her behind your back? I am sure when your boyfriend finds out he will kick you our of the apartment. Maybe you should start looking for a new one now. Haha we live in a house. But thanks for the advice.
Author haagen Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 Do your boyfriend a favor and break up with him. Whether you cheat or not, he deserves better. The fact that you're considering this speaks volumes about your character, or lack thereof. Maybe you will eventually grow up and learn some communications skills. I ask for advice, and not for your judgment.
mr.dream merchant Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I ask for advice, and not for your judgment. That is advice.
TaraMaiden Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I ask for advice, and not for your judgment. I think you are probably the last person here who should be adopting the moral high ground. Would you care to address the question I asked you? _/l\_
Author haagen Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 I think you are probably the last person here who should be adopting the moral high ground. Would you care to address the question I asked you? _/l\_ You people are acting like I killed someone. Chill. I didn't do anything. I just have thoughts in my head and wanted to share them with someone. Do you think the world is perfect and whenever two people get married that from that point on, nobody thinks about being with someone else? I have seen fathers with children, checking girls out. And married women staring at the single guy with hunger in their eyes. It is just in our nature to think about things like that. If we do these things, that is another question.
Lucky_One Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 Fine. Get defensive. But be honest and talk about your feelings for this other guy with your BF. Work through it, or get past it, or end the current R. You got lots of advice, but it is very doubtful that you will get encouragement to do that to your BF. Try philanders.com for that.
Trimmer Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 You people are acting like I killed someone. Chill. I didn't do anything. I just have thoughts in my head and wanted to share them with someone. Do you think the world is perfect and whenever two people get married that from that point on, nobody thinks about being with someone else? I have seen fathers with children, checking girls out. And married women staring at the single guy with hunger in their eyes. It is just in our nature to think about things like that. If we do these things, that is another question. You did not share that you were "thinking about" these things. You asked "Should I cheat?" You aren't just "checking out" someone at the Sizzler salad bar. You've started (and I assume you've hidden from your BF) a relationship (in which you are feeling sexual attraction and are asking "should I cheat?") with another, real human being. That's more than just the thoughts of a married person wondering what it would have been like, if...
lostsunsets Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 The funny thing is, he is working to give you both a better life. Since you are just imagining, being with this other guy. Why don't you imagine how crushed your bf would be if he found out that while he was at work, you were boinking some guy? This is an anonymous thread, but as a person, you still have to look in the mirror. You don't want anyone here to judge you. OK, how about you look in the mirror and judge yourself. And you know all those married men you see checking out other woman. They have nothing to do with who you are as a person. Understand this, that if you are looking at other people as a standard to set your actions by, why don't you compare yourself to a higher standard then those men. You see this really tells what kind of a person you are. You compare yourself with those who would justify your lust. That's what kind of person you are. Don't you understand that morals like water will flow to the lowest level when not compared to a better, finer example. So don't accuse people here of judging you. Consider judging yourself for being less then your love, and most of all you deserve.
Lizzie60 Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 My advice: have sex with him.. get it out of your system..
somedude81 Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 My advice: have sex with him.. get it out of your system.. If she does that I hope she's able to quickly find a new place to live haagen, if you are not happy with your sex life, do something to improve it with your BF.
39388 Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 I live with my boyfriend of 3 years and things are "OK". I mean we get along and everything. He works all day and is almost never home. Our sex live is not as good as it used to be. I net this guy, that is the cutest thing on this planet. He is beautiful and just amazing. I feel so good when I am with him. I have not slept with him but I really really want to. I do not want a relationship with him. I just want him for sex. What should I do? You should have a talk with your boyfriend about what can be improved in your replationship. Do you communicate well with him? I'm guessing not so well in some cases at least since there is an unresolved issue. If things can't be fixed to what you find to be acceptable, you of course can break up with him. Read all the threads here about all the regrets people have about cheating. There are some very sad stories. Do you want to be part of one? Cheating virtually never leads to good results and people end up really hurt, often for many years. Once you cheat, there is no going back. I really hope you think all this through.
lostsunsets Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 I think by the cavalier attitude in the way she speaks about her boyfriend, you can see that she has no respect for him. It's sad. He works hard to feed her and she is ready to betray him. I hope he wises up. She is obviously not long term relationship material.
Javelin Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 She is obviously not long term relationship material. She isn't short term material either.
hurt4life Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 I have not slept with him but I really really want to. I do not want a relationship with him. I just want him for sex. What should I do? Those are not thoughts, they're wants, and that makes you a cheater already. You just want to F*ck him, you should be ashamed. You don't deserve your boyfriend. He sure as hell don't deserve to have a cheater like you. If you really love your boyfriend, work on rebuilding your sex and channel those wants onto him instead.
jnj express Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Hey H.---1st off, this crap about this guy is beautiful is so much crap---beauty is only skin deep----what do even know about the guy you are thinking about spreading your legs for----Do you know if he is diseased, do you know if he is a nut case----any "bad boy" can talk a good game, that does not mean he has any class----or are you just looking for some sex. Once you start screwing around on your BF you are looking for trouble, you might fall for the other guy, then what do you do. If you want to be in an open relationship and be free to mess around then tell your BF what you want, and don't defend yourself that you are just thinking about it, If you are in a happy loving relationship, you would not be thinking about having sex with other guys. Right now you can do anything you want, as you are not legally tied up, but do the right thing and talk to your BF, and tell him you are unhappy with the way your relationship is going, cuz of his being gone due to work, and then tired when he gets home. Yes everybody who is normal looks at members of the other sex, but for the most part they do not think of having sex with others if they are in a satisfying relationship----If you are thinking about cheating then you really do need to examine your relationship and where it's going.
Chrome Barracuda Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 Wow, just Wow!!! and people like tami and lizzie and alot of others are always wondering why I'm so mad at cheaters and people who cheat? I give you exhibit A, for your viewing! This woman needs to have the same thing happen to her and let's see how she would feel. remember we all have those thoughts in our heads, we check others out and it's okay.. Remember guys it's okay. Wow If this is what I got to look forward to dealing with women of our generation I'd rather be alone and single. Pipe them down, dont wife them down...
Aprilmkidd Posted May 5, 2009 Posted May 5, 2009 I live with my boyfriend of 3 years and things are "OK". I mean we get along and everything. He works all day and is almost never home. Our sex live is not as good as it used to be. I net this guy, that is the cutest thing on this planet. He is beautiful and just amazing. I feel so good when I am with him. I have not slept with him but I really really want to. I do not want a relationship with him. I just want him for sex. What should I do? Okay if it were me in this perdictument, I think you should really think about what you'll be doing to the relationship even though he mite not find out still be considerate of his feelings meaning if you dont want this guy anymore just tell him and move on please dont play the field cuz seriously it'll hurt you more than it'z gonna hurt him.
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