green apples Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 How can you tell whether a guy is not asking you out because he's shy or already involved? Or do we just have to grope in the dark?
paddington bear Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 This one is a toughie...but in my limited experience, I've been with guys who I thought were shy, and thought that's why they weren't asking me out, when in fact their shyness didn't prevent them from asking other girls out. If you like someone who you think is shy, make it clear to them that you would say yes if they wanted to ask you out, so that they are not fearing the rejection. If nothing happens after that, then you have your answer
Author green apples Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 This one is a toughie...but in my limited experience, I've been with guys who I thought were shy, and thought that's why they weren't asking me out, when in fact their shyness didn't prevent them from asking other girls out. Do you know what prevented them from asking girls out?
era Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 How can you tell whether a guy is not asking you out because he's shy or already involved? Or do we just have to grope in the dark? Is this the same guy from your thread you posted yesterday?? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t187554/
Author green apples Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 Is this the same guy from your thread you posted yesterday?? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t187554/ It's not the same guy but I would like to make sure that I'm able to tell the next time in general. Not much fun groping in the dark.
paddington bear Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 Do you know what prevented them from asking girls out? That was my point it DIDN'T prevent them from asking other girls out, just me - unless you see this person a lot and get to watch from the sidelines, lack of interest in you can be taken as shyness - see how so-called shy men deal with the other females around them, if their shyness doesn't prevent them from flirting with other girls, well then, they are not 'that' shy after all.
Author green apples Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 That was my point it DIDN'T prevent them from asking other girls out, just me - unless you see this person a lot and get to watch from the sidelines, lack of interest in you can be taken as shyness - see how so-called shy men deal with the other females around them, if their shyness doesn't prevent them from flirting with other girls, well then, they are not 'that' shy after all. IC. I misread your earlier post.
carhill Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 OP, I can tell you from much experience that this dynamic won't work for you. If you're trying to "figure out" a man's relationship status or interest and aren't doing it directly, by being assertive, then this tells me you're more passive (not a bad thing) in the courting process. This means you require a more assertive man, and shy guys who fear rejection aren't going to work for you. You need to attract the more assertive, confident guys who mesh better with your relationship/courting style.
Author green apples Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 OP, I can tell you from much experience that this dynamic won't work for you. If you're trying to "figure out" a man's relationship status or interest and aren't doing it directly, by being assertive, then this tells me you're more passive (not a bad thing) in the courting process. This means you require a more assertive man, and shy guys who fear rejection aren't going to work for you. You need to attract the more assertive, confident guys who mesh better with your relationship/courting style. Thanks for point it out. I didn't see it; too close to the project. I'll work on it!
era Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 I think she's trying to say that no guys are asking her out. You need to attract the more assertive, confident guys who mesh better with your relationship/courting style. LOL...I don't think she's developed a "relationship/courting style" OP - how old are you?
carhill Posted May 3, 2009 Posted May 3, 2009 Well, it sounds like the project is being worked on. Why does this not sound like a girl? OP, maybe that's your issue. IME, girls who do not act or feel "feminine", regardless of their appearance, send out signals that men don't find attractive. Grossly, I don't want to date one of my buds except with longer hair and breasts. The beauty of a woman is in her spirit and how she expresses her intellect and emotions. All the parts are just a covering. What's your opinion about that?
Author green apples Posted May 3, 2009 Author Posted May 3, 2009 I think she's trying to say that no guys are asking her out. LOL...I don't think she's developed a "relationship/courting style" OP - how old are you? I'm 23. On the contrary, I get asked out quite a bit though I may not always like the people who ask me out. Then again, it's not always easy for me to put down my ego to ask guys out either. Carhill, I think I have "the beauty of a woman" covered.
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