Is it still wrong to move on?

[SBG04]

So, we broke it off about 10 months ago now. I am still desperately in love with her. I still crave her with every inch of my body. I would still still give anything to have her back in my life. I still consider her my sole-mate. But, I know these feelings are not returned, and after 10 months of telling myself otherwise, I know things probably are not going to change so I must try and move on with my life.

 

I know there are other areas of moving on that do not include finding someone else, but is it wrong to find someone else while I still feel this way about my ex? Or is pushing through the feelings part of the transition?

[BW007]

Ok I will try to give you my opinion which I am also trying to direct back at myself too(not very successfully).

 

I think you have to accept it is over. 10 months downtime is a lifetime in a relationship and unless she has put some serious effort into getting you back by now it is just a nice dream you are having.

And soulmate is an idea that you should ditch. There are many many women who would be a great life partner for you and the magical mystical "soulmate" is actually BS. It is a fairytale. Try to stop thinking in those terms.

 

Speaking for myself, I let my support system of friends fall apart in the midst of the relationship and I am having a hell of a time figuring out a social structure again. This I cannot lay the blame on her for, I put all my eggs in one basket, depended too much on the relationship for my social context and now I am F'ed.I tried going out to the bars tonight and it was just terrible. I am not ready to try again yet, and I really felt the negative space of where she was. Man I am a trainwreck.

 

I would try some dating if I were you, but don't let your past mess you up. If you have a good group of friends tap into that and figure out some things to do as a group and socially...roadtrip... Vegas....World tour... whatever anything that will get your independent, individual life going again.