DollWelch Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 I can't wrap my mind around this practice, if you will. There are many women, out there, that I have witnessed dating and engaging in serious longer term relationships with men 5, 10, or even 15 years their junior. But how do they do it? How can these women be compatible with such men? I'm having a hard time being able to be slightly or remotely interested in dating a man 1 year, let alone 10 years my junior. Unfortunately, that's my case at the moment. I have become interested in a man who is approximately 1 (or) 1.5 years my junior -and I am struggling to overcome the fact that he's younger than I am. Does age play a large factor? Or Am I being too critical?
Bejita463 Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 I can't wrap my mind around this practice, if you will. There are many women, out there, that I have witnessed dating and engaging in serious longer term relationships with men 5, 10, or even 15 years their junior. I don't understand why it matters to you? But how do they do it? How can these women be compatible with such men? They're still people. The maturity levels probably not significantly different in those couplings, which is much more important than literal age. I have become interested in a man who is approximately 1 (or) 1.5 years my junior -and I am struggling to overcome the fact that he's younger than I am. Do what you feel is best for you. Only you know what that is, but keep in mind a day might come where you'll wonder what might have been. Is a minor age difference worth that? To me it isn't. That is my opinion on it.
era Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 I have become interested in a man who is approximately 1 (or) 1.5 years my junior -and I am struggling to overcome the fact that he's younger than I am. That's hardly an age gap..
BentSpine Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 There are many women, out there, that I have witnessed dating and engaging in serious longer term relationships with men 5, 10, or even 15 years their junior. But how do they do it? How can these women be compatible with such men?Short answer: Because individual men are different. And the women aren't in a relationship with all men, only the one man who makes her feel good in the way that she, from all her good & bad experiences, values highly.
Mahatma Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 Well when I look at myself just 2 years ago, I see how immature I was. If I look at myself 5 years from now, I will see how immature I am at this point. I could never date a girl more than a couple of years younger than me (Also the age of consent in Texas is 17, so more than a couple years and I get in trouble). I think once I get out of college, and the girls I am dating have got through that part of life, 5 years wont make such a difference.
yeex Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 Depends how old you are. Also where you are. In the US I think in high school and college usually no more than a couple of years age difference. Of course there are always exceptions. Late 20s and beyond, it all depends on the people and maturity levels and life experiences. I am in my thirties and cannot see myself dating anybody over ten years younger or older. But I would be open to it if the opportunity arose and I was interested in that person. I have dated a girl 7 years younger and it was fine. Seems like people in Europe, that I have met anyways, are a little more relaxed about age differences.
Author DollWelch Posted May 1, 2009 Author Posted May 1, 2009 Do what you feel is best for you. Only you know what that is, but keep in mind a day might come where you'll wonder what might have been. Is a minor age difference worth that? To me it isn't. That is my opinion on it. I am not sure if an age difference is worth that. The one thing I do know is, I am the type of woman that is incredibly turned off by an age difference; whether it be 6 months or 6 years my junior. I just don't like to date younger men. It creates a kind of itch that I try to immediately scrub off because I am not comfortable in an age difference form of relationship. That is particularly why I can't remove the thought of me, the older one, the "mother/teacher" figure having to date a younger man, a "son/student". Even though I really am interested in this younger man, a very intelligent, funny, nice, and successful person, I can't get myself to overcome this issue. Perhaps taking unwilled chances could bode great happiness? I don't know.
BootsElectric Posted May 1, 2009 Posted May 1, 2009 Honestly, that sounds a bit shallow of you. Do you really think someone 6 months older than you is all that more mature than someone six months younger? Case by case basis, depends wholly on the person. My girlfriend is 5 years my senior, and she has no problem with it. I actually was the one who was more worried in the beginning, the fact she was older intimidated me, but my fears were allayed when she told me she was very surprised when she found out I was only 21 when she assumed I was much older due to my level of maturity. Now it's something we can joke about, but our connection runs much stronger than the few years difference. Moral of the story, age is just a number, maturity, wisdom, experience, don't necessary correlate to that number.
Just Angel Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 That is particularly why I can't remove the thought of me, the older one, the "mother/teacher" figure having to date a younger man, a "son/student". Life is rarely so black and white. You can choose to continue to automaticly place you and this guy in these type casted roles, or...dont. You can choose to stop seeing the numbers and just focus on the chemistry and the relationship. If you CHOOSE to make the numbers important, then simply do not date anyone younger.
You'reasian Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 I dated a woman 12 years older at one point in my life - no problems at all.
Sam Spade Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 It seems that people are the most picky about age in their 30's. Once you hit 40+ all bets are off and I don't think it matters much to most people (men or women), unless they are particularly good looking and otherwise above average.
Kamille Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 It's a preference. A preference is a preference and there isn't much you can do about it. See, I have no issues dating younger men, but the one thing I struggle with is dating men that are shorter then me. I'm 5'8 so it does happen once in awhile. Only once did it not bother me, and this is because I was really into the guy. So, if a year and a half age difference bothers you this much, it's because the young man is not enough of a draw for you to overlook your ingrained preferences. Don't beat yourself up over it and just move on.
Sam Spade Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 I dated a woman 12 years older at one point in my life - no problems at all. Me too, but I wast 20 at the time. I certainly wouldn't do it now.
You'reasian Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 See, I have no issues dating younger men, but the one thing I struggle with is dating men that are shorter then me. I'm 5'8 so it does happen once in awhile. Only once did it not bother me, and this is because I was really into the guy. Nice! I dated a female who was 6'1" (not much taller than me) but with heels on, she was noticeably taller. Why do I feel confident around taller women?
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 It all depends on the person. My bf is 4 years younger. I don't feel any sort of age difference usually. The only time I think about it is when he brings up kids and I think that I ain't gettin' any younger... I dated one guy who was 9 years younger than me. Very successful, very mature, rarely felt "older" than him, except when I would mention something like the tv show "What's Happening" or the 70's gas crisis and he would look at me with this blank face... Then again, I dated a guy 10 years younger than me who was mentally 15 years younger than me. Kind of a tool, but very hot and good in bed
Sam Spade Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 1-1.5 years age difference however is mostly OPs own psychological thing/issue. Such an age diffrence is so small that it wil have no correlation with looks or traits whatsoever.
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted May 2, 2009 Posted May 2, 2009 1-1.5 years age difference however is mostly OPs own psychological thing/issue. Such an age diffrence is so small that it wil have no correlation with looks or traits whatsoever. I agree with this. I wonder why she has such an issue with such a slight difference? Something to look at, OP?
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