Can a man attend strip clubs and watch porn still be in a committed relationship?

[hollisterbaby]

Or will this make a man want to be single? If he wants to watch lots of porn and attend strip clubs,canm he still be in a committed relationship and still show his love and affection for is gf or will all of the other women that he sees steer him away from her.Just a question.

[IrishCarBomb]

Well, what do you think?

[Lizzie60]

Or will this make a man want to be single

 

If he wants to watch lots of porn and attend strip clubs,canm he still be in a committed relationship and still show his love and affection for is gf or will all of the other women that he sees steer him away from her.Just a question.

 

No not at all.. tons of married men go to strip clubs AND watch porn.. and they want to remain married..

 

Of course... but IMO if he is constantly watching porn or in the strip clubs.. then something is wrong.. he's not that committed..

[normal]

Depends on the guy.

I doubt it makes all of them cheat.

 

It just makes most of them jack off.

[bean1]

My committed man loves porn but is too darn cheap to take me to a strip club and have a couple drinks together. Now THAT'S typical of a man in a relationship, lol.

[xpaperxcutx]

I doubt cheating would be the biggest problem. You'll have to question if he has psychological problems.

 

Think David Duchovny= sex addict

[Lizzie60]

My advice: take pole dancing.. and keep him home..

 

or watch porn with him...

[Sephirothh]

men that go to stip clubs or like watching porn while in a committed relationship are stupid and are afraid to spice it up and get kinky or get hott with who they are with now, its a certain fear and these are usually dumb men. But it probably turns you on a little bit becuz he isn't paying as attention to you as he should. Just remember though...if a stripper does ask to take him home with him, he will most likely go home with her, the only thing is thats a very small chance of that happening.....but just keep in mind thats what will happen if given the opportunity

[fishtaco]

Obsession/addiction is always bad, doesn't have to be porn or strip clubs. If he's addicted to video games, or drinking, or poker, that has the same detrimental effect to the relationship.

 

But if it's not obsession/addiction level, then no, they're just things that the man does, and is completely independent of his commitment to the relationship, i.e. a loyal man will stay loyal, porn or no porn. A cheater will cheat, porn or no porn.

 

The only time porn/strip club is an issue is if one person thinks it's fine but the other person think is teh evil satan 666. But then that would be a compatibility issue, it could be about anything else, religion, politics, sports team, whatever. Any incompatibility causes damage to the relationship, doesn't have to be porn.

[bluechocolate]

Can a man attend strip clubs and watch porn still be in a committed relationship?

 

The answer to that depends entirely on his partner.

[loser101]

Or will this make a man want to be single? If he wants to watch lots of porn and attend strip clubs,canm he still be in a committed relationship and still show his love and affection for is gf or will all of the other women that he sees steer him away from her.Just a question.

 

as long as he is not obsessed I really don't think so. if he is your man, try to watch porn with him time to time if you are comfortable with that. it's just a visual pleasure for him.

[Jersey Shortie]

Or will this make a man want to be single? If he wants to watch lots of porn and attend strip clubs,canm he still be in a committed relationship and still show his love and affection for is gf or will all of the other women that he sees steer him away from her.Just a question.

 

You're questions can't be answered simply.

 

Of course a man can watch porn and attend strip clubs and still be in a committed relationship. That doesn't mean he is really all that committed to the relationship though. It means he is committed to himself first. He can still indulge in these things and show his SO love and affection. But that doesn't mean that the level of affection and love he has is greater then or equals the love and affection he has of himself. In my opinion, if a man is in a committed relationship and divides that time between the time he spends on porn and strip clubs, he is a very vapid and selfish man. He is only concerned about himself, he is not really engaged with his partner or relationship.

 

I do think men are able to show love and affection to their SO and still disrespect them at the same time. As a woman, I need more from a man then just his love and affection while he scampers off to over indulge himself in whatever he feels like because he wants to act more boy then man. I need a man. I need a man who is going to want to stand up for me and by me. Not throw me scraps of affection and then scamper off to drool over other women. How can a man be really engaged like that? He is spreading himself out everywhere. You don't have to get into a committed relationship. But why get into one and then make your SO pay the price for it?

 

Too many "men" today are shallow, spoiled and don't act like real men anymore. Alot of other women will settle for less. Alot of men will settle for being less then they can be. I think men can be so much better then the media an society tells them to be. Better then the stupid lad-mags tell them to be, better then what the tv tells them they can be....

[Mahatma]

I personally have no interest in going to a strip club, but I do not think it would want to make me leave my girlfriend or wife if I had one.

 

My advice: take pole dancing.. and keep him home..

 

or watch porn with him...

 

My girlfriend will watch porn with me and it's great

[JohnnyBlaze]

Just remember though...if a stripper does ask to take him home with him, he will most likely go home with her, the only thing is thats a very small chance of that happening.....but just keep in mind thats what will happen if given the opportunity

That's a pretty big leap, don't you think? Opportunity doesn't always imply action. Example: back in my college days, I was a pizza delivery schmuck. One night, the last run of the night, was to a hotel about 10 clicks out of town. Four college chicks had come back from prom, were drunk out of their tree, and (from their comments), really wanted to give the pizza delivery guy the ride of his life. Since my girlfriend and I weren't living together at the time and I'd already paid the store off, I could've stayed as long as I wanted. My girl wouldn't have called me until the next day anyway (as it was about 2 in the morning), the cooks were closing up the store, so they wouldn't care. I could've stayed over night, had some great group sex and been back without my girl ever knowing anything happened. But I didn't. Why? Because, like a lot of guys, I'm faithful.

 

Point being, just because the opportunity presents itself, please don't assume that the majority of men would jump at it. Despite what we're portrayed as, many of us really are faithful to our wives/girlfriends, even when given the chance to cheat.

 

 

Disclaimer: as a young'un, I used to go to strip clubs. I don't anymore. Not because the women aren't as pretty, or I'm too mature for it, or anything like that. There are two simple reasons. One, I hate being bugged every 5 minutes by some chick asking if I want a lap/private/whatever-they-call-it-now dance. Two, the beer's too bloody expensive. If I want to get drunk and watch 20-somethings get naked, I'll go to the local college meet-markets. Same show, cheaper drinks.

[Woggle]

Not all men will take up every woman on her offer. When I was bartending I had plenty of drunk women offering themselves to me and I never took them up on it. Men are not some animals incapable of self control.

[Jersey Shortie]

My girlfriend will watch porn with me and it's great

 

What's not to like? You get to get a hard on over all the hot chicks you want in porn and then get to do your girlfriend after getting the hard on over the other women and you don't have to worry about another guy getting in the way because most porn focuses on the woman most of the time. Sure it's great. It's great for men. The message is that women get to be interchangable, less important, other women's beauty and sexuality can turn you on then you can use it on you rpartner for your satisfaction. The message is that men's sexual needs are greater and more important then your own women in your life. The message is that men can't really be faithful and don't need to respect or protect their wife/girlfriend. As a woman, you alone just aren't good enough even for your own man. As a woman, you are interchangable and useless because men are more interested in getting variety then showing loyatly.

 

 

That's a pretty big leap, don't you think? Opportunity doesn't always imply action. ..... I could've stayed over night, had some great group sex and been back without my girl ever knowing anything happened. But I didn't. Why? Because, like a lot of guys, I'm faithful.

 

You didn't seek that situation out though. You walked into it unknowingly. Why go to a strip club and put yourself in that situation and then turn around and say that your actions are totally sound? It's a bit hypocrtical don't you think? If most men are faithful, why are most men so eager to turn to strip clubs or porn despite being so faithful? A faithful man is one that is able to be happy with his partner right? Not one that goes out seeking sexual thrills from other women even if he isn't touching them.

 

Point being, just because the opportunity presents itself, please don't assume that the majority of men would jump at it. Despite what we're portrayed as, many of us really are faithful to our wives/girlfriends, even when given the chance to cheat.

 

Well, I think there is a huge issue with what men say is true and the actions men take showing what is true. You're situation wasn't something you were looking for. Men going to strip clubs know what situation they are putting themselves in. It doesn't mean that we think he is going to cheat but that action right there is pretty telling. How faithful are men really if they need outside validation from other women and to seek sexual thrills from other women through strip clubs ro porn? Seems to me that it's very easy to be loyal when you subsitute porn and strip clubs and use that interchangably with the girlfriend/wife. Is that really considered loyatly now-a-days?

[Treasa]

What's not to like? You get to get a hard on over all the hot chicks you want in porn and then get to do your girlfriend after getting the hard on over the other women and you don't have to worry about another guy getting in the way because most porn focuses on the woman most of the time. Sure it's great. It's great for men. The message is that women get to be interchangable, less important, other women's beauty and sexuality can turn you on then you can use it on you rpartner for your satisfaction. The message is that men's sexual needs are greater and more important then your own women in your life. The message is that men can't really be faithful and don't need to respect or protect their wife/girlfriend. As a woman, you alone just aren't good enough even for your own man. As a woman, you are interchangable and useless because men are more interested in getting variety then showing loyatly.

 

So what if the woman is turned on by porn too? Does that mean that her partner is also interchangeable?

[JohnnyBlaze]

You didn't seek that situation out though. You walked into it unknowingly. Why go to a strip club and put yourself in that situation and then turn around and say that your actions are totally sound? It's a bit hypocrtical don't you think? If most men are faithful, why are most men so eager to turn to strip clubs or porn despite being so faithful? A faithful man is one that is able to be happy with his partner right? Not one that goes out seeking sexual thrills from other women even if he isn't touching them.

"Unknowingly" is not entirely accurate. Seducing the pizza guy seems to be a standard fantasy. It was like being a bartender; I had so much access to women and drugs that it was amazing. And my girlfriend knew this; I didn't hide it from her. Although the individual situations may have been different, the song was generally the same. You came to expect pretty much anything. So I wouldn't quite say it was unknowingly.

 

 

Well, I think there is a huge issue with what men say is true and the actions men take showing what is true. You're situation wasn't something you were looking for. Men going to strip clubs know what situation they are putting themselves in. It doesn't mean that we think he is going to cheat but that action right there is pretty telling. How faithful are men really if they need outside validation from other women and to seek sexual thrills from other women through strip clubs ro porn? Seems to me that it's very easy to be loyal when you subsitute porn and strip clubs and use that interchangably with the girlfriend/wife. Is that really considered loyatly now-a-days?

 

It's all about self-control. How many Americans, holding legally registered guns, have gotten mad at someone and not shot them? A lot. So if you know there's a chance you'll get mad that day, why carry? Again, it's about self-control. Granted, the example is extreme, but it does illustrate my point.

 

Besides, there's a greater chance of something happening when a guy goes out to a regular bar. One girl I used to date was beautiful and flirty. Invariably, every time I'd get up to go to the washroom, I'd come back and find out (from her) that someone walked by and gave her his number. But I never stopped taking her out to bars (we still went to that particular bar), and I never doubted her. Why? She had self-control, and I had faith in her.

 

And for the record, in all the days I used to go to the strip club, I never saw any hint of 'validation' from it. It's hard to feel validated when you have to pay a woman to hang out with you. For us, (other than the fact that they used to let me in when I was 16 without carding me - yeah, I got in with only a beginner's license! ), it was as much a matter of being able to shrug off societal requirements for an hour or two. If you itch, scratch. If you've got gas, belch. If a girl walking by has a nice ass, say "look at the ass on her!". No remorse, no repercussions. It was a chance to not be what the world wanted us to be, even if only for a short while. Sure, some of the women were pretty (some were just butt-ugly), but as a girl I used to work with once said, "if you've seen one, you've seen 'em both". The girls became almost incidental after a while.

 

Granted, I'm not saying that all men think that way, or that nobody feels any sense of validation from it. That's just my experience and opinion.

[flyingtim01]

Wow JS...you're seem to be so angry Lots of women watch porn too...does that mean that her man should feel like crap because his woman thinks he's uesless?

[Sephirothh]

That's a pretty big leap, don't you think? Opportunity doesn't always imply action. Example: back in my college days, I was a pizza delivery schmuck. One night, the last run of the night, was to a hotel about 10 clicks out of town. Four college chicks had come back from prom, were drunk out of their tree, and (from their comments), really wanted to give the pizza delivery guy the ride of his life. Since my girlfriend and I weren't living together at the time and I'd already paid the store off, I could've stayed as long as I wanted. My girl wouldn't have called me until the next day anyway (as it was about 2 in the morning), the cooks were closing up the store, so they wouldn't care. I could've stayed over night, had some great group sex and been back without my girl ever knowing anything happened. But I didn't. Why? Because, like a lot of guys, I'm faithful.

 

Point being, just because the opportunity presents itself, please don't assume that the majority of men would jump at it. Despite what we're portrayed as, many of us really are faithful to our wives/girlfriends, even when given the chance to cheat.

 

 

Disclaimer: as a young'un, I used to go to strip clubs. I don't anymore. Not because the women aren't as pretty, or I'm too mature for it, or anything like that. There are two simple reasons. One, I hate being bugged every 5 minutes by some chick asking if I want a lap/private/whatever-they-call-it-now dance. Two, the beer's too bloody expensive. If I want to get drunk and watch 20-somethings get naked, I'll go to the local college meet-markets. Same show, cheaper drinks.

 

 

Sorry not really buying that...first off the opportunity doesn't happen that often to men as it is, that in itself is intriguing and makes us feel empowered.... fact of the matter is any hott female can get just about anyone by simply throwing herself at him in a situation where you don't really know one another, once that happens the mind and reason shuts down in our minds and we start thinking with our other parts....mainly becuz we have allowed women to put a stranglehold on the of dating scene as it is and men always make it so easy for the women to get what they want all the time....for the faithful that can withstand this, i applaud you, but im still think they are very few and far in between.

 

Relationship is bugged so bad now a days to the point of where reasoining and guilt doesn't exist, why becuz we think like this "they will never find out anyway" Guilt doesn't exist anymore or at least doesn't feel as bad as it used to be thats just how it is

[alphamale]

Or will this make a man want to be single? If he wants to watch lots of porn and attend strip clubs,canm he still be in a committed relationship and still show his love and affection for is gf or will all of the other women that he sees steer him away from her.Just a question.

just like women are good at multi-tasking, men are even better at compartmentalizing

[JohnnyBlaze]

Sorry not really buying that...first off the opportunity doesn't happen that often to men as it is, that in itself is intriguing and makes us feel empowered....

Buy it or not, it don't bother me. I'm telling it, not selling it. Did I say I wasn't flattered all to hell? No. Because I was. I'll gladly admit that! I knew they'd have done the same thing if it was any one of the other guys, but I don't care.

 

As you said though, we ALLOW women to take control of our minds. That's the trick. If we give the power away, we can take it back. We just have to have the balls to do it.

 

Part of the problem is in the reporting. People always talk about the ones who gave in and cheated. They never say two words about the "close calls" or "could have's".

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

and sometimes it's just entertainment. The partner's who create a big drama situation really frustrate me. He's with YOU. Watching porn and strippers doesn't always mean he wants to cheat on you. It might not even be a fantasy, just plain old guy stuff.

 

I don't think it's disprespectful at all as long as he tells you where he's going and what he's doing.

 

I had no issues with my exH watching porn until I found out he was watching it when I was in bed waiting for him to come and have sex with ME. But there were other issues around my situation.

[IceWind]

My girlfriend is very understanding of mens "needs" and as I long as I'm not "flirting" with other woman or our sex life suffers, she doesn't mind me looking at eye candy. Hell, she's even willing to take me to my first strip joint and has even taken a tour of a brothel with a "working woman" and thought it was cool! Hell, even she appreciates the fine beauty of a nice rack and ass. We enoy watching "naughty" stuff together and making fun of it.

[chrissylee]

Or will this make a man want to be single? If he wants to watch lots of porn and attend strip clubs,canm he still be in a committed relationship and still show his love and affection for is gf or will all of the other women that he sees steer him away from her.Just a question.

 

 

I think it depends on the relationship. In my opinon if my man ever goes to a strip club he is cheating on me and is no longer committed to me or our relationship. So no in my case if my man goes to a strip club he is not committed.