Tryng2Trust08 Posted April 30, 2009 Posted April 30, 2009 Im not sure what to do. Me and my ex are on speaking terms, we have seen each other once in the past couple of weeks,but have no plans of hanging out again. He has done most of the contacting in the last couple of weeks, called, texted, I think I initiated 2 conversations. Everything is 100% fine between us at this point. I am doing soo much better and feel like I want to move on in some kind of direction(this time for real), I have let go of so much of the anger and Im feeling great. He is having a hard time with work and other things, so I have been a friend to him. But there is feeling in me that either wants to move forward as in us dating/hanging out again (if thats even possible), or move on without him in my life. We have talked or texted at least every other day, so this isnt like once every couple of weeks communication. Im not going to ask him to hang out, I just think he needs to be the one asking at this point and he has not. I'm not going to tell him how Im feeling because in the past that has not worked for me the best and I dont want to argue. I feel the only thing left to do is if he does contact me, I should ignore him and he will get the point? Im not sure? I do not know his intentions in keeping contact and I can't ask him. I have gone NC, it lasted 2 days and he contacted me and I responded.
bluewolf17 Posted April 30, 2009 Posted April 30, 2009 Hi! I feel like our situations are so similiar, it's eerie. I am in the same boat as you, my ex and I have hung out and talked, but it's not Progresing (at least not as quickley or the way I want it to). The main diffrence is that from reading your post, it doesn't really seem like you want to get back together. Do you? What has changed? Also, why can't you tell him how you feel? Are you afraid that "talking about it" will scare him away? I guess I don't get that part. I do agree, it's hard if you are the one who wants to try again, and the other person is on the fence (like in my case). I feel like a pyscho if I am the one that always calls and trys to make plans. I want him to want to see me, because he wants to, not because he is fulfilling my request. I want him to ask me out. That why I feel like he is making an effort too. I am on day two of NC as well. Keep me updated.
Lishy Posted April 30, 2009 Posted April 30, 2009 I am in the same situation too! My ex wants to be friends, he is with another girl now and I thought I could handle it, and I DID handle it fine until last night when he told me I am the love of his life and that he knows he has lost the best thing that has happened to him - Arghhhh why did he have to say that? Plus he was reminiscing about our past etc I woke up this morning feeling like poop! I sent him a text asking him not to call me anymore, he then tried to call me! Doh Ignore his calls until you have truley moved on is my advice!
nolanola Posted April 30, 2009 Posted April 30, 2009 I am new to adding my two cents to things, but have been reading the posts on here for a while and am in a similar situation to yours. My ex and I work together and are "friends". I'm putting it in quotes because on the surface we are friends, but there is always an underlying weirdness to it. To me, I know that I'm not ready to truly be his friend in the way that I consider other people my friend. I wouldn't feel ok if he started telling me about a girl he wanted to go out with, for example and I don't think (judging by his recent behavior) that he would be ok hearing the same about me. Since I know this about myself, I don't call him or text him. We are friendly at work and this is where I feel like I'm in the same spot as you. It probably would be best for me to keep things very short and business like, but I still adore him and it's hard. It's hard to ignore someone you still care about. I don't know what the right answer is, but I sympathize with you....
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