sfsassy Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 The voice of wisdom speaks. My life experience (and female friends) matches up. So, answering the OP, specifically, since it speaks about a SO rather than someone one is dating, I would say yes. I look forward to being with a woman who enjoys aural bonding as much as I do. My wife seems to bond better through shared silences There's the rub. At least you have maybe gallows humor about it.
sfsassy Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 I couldn't be with someone who wasn't pretty verbal, and who didn't like to talk just because. I do tend to go for more metro guys, but have dated "normal" guys too, lol. All of them enjoyed chatting with me. I do agree with those who say when pesuring someone, you will be friendzoned if you just talk alot. I have made this mistake with guys, lol.
era Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 Do real men call their significant other just to talk... Of course he does!..I adore it...pleasant conversation with him always brightens my day. Oh wait...just remembered...I currently don't have a SO. Nevermind..
Mahatma Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 Title says all. Say you aren't one of those metro/trendy/artsy guys. I am one of those guys, and I hardly ever call her "just to chat." I do love to just talk to her though "just to chat." Although, part of the reason for this could be that we practically live together..
xpaperxcutx Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 I think the issue here is that most men just find other alternatives to connect with their SO. They start mailing, texting, or messaging, that it's no longer a significant exchanges of " how are you" but rather " hey yo, what's up?" I would actually prefer a man to call. It's the gesture that tells me that no matter how busy they've been, no matter how tired, they still thought of me at the end of the day to give me a ring.
xpaperxcutx Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 I couldn't be with someone who wasn't pretty verbal, and who didn't like to talk just because. I do tend to go for more metro guys, but have dated "normal" guys too, lol. All of them enjoyed chatting with me. I do agree with those who say when pesuring someone, you will be friendzoned if you just talk alot. I have made this mistake with guys, lol. SF, what's the difference between a metro and " normal" man that calls?
MissConduct Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 Of course real men call their significant others just to talk. That's been my experience at least, and I don't date metros or prissy boys. I like real manly guys that play sports and shave and snore. . There has to be a lot of emotional distance to keep the sex good What a peculiar thing to say!?!?! You were being sarcastic? That makes no sense at all. From the female perspective that is the surefire way to have sex cut out of the equation, you distance the emotional and our sex drive for the guy goes way down. This is why so many people end up in emotional affairs and consequently cheat.
carhill Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 This presumes the female is healthy psychologically. Often such is not the case, where past conditioning warps their sense of themselves, reality and what is healthy for them. They stay in the unhealthy situation. BTW, the same can be said for men. I can say with absolute confidence that lack of emotional intimacy affected my sex drive and caused me to look for that emotional intimacy elsewhere. I wasn't healthy psychologically at that time. I stayed. Wrong.
MissConduct Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 This presumes the female is healthy psychologically. Often such is not the case, where past conditioning warps their sense of themselves, reality and what is healthy for them. They stay in the unhealthy situation. what do you mean by that? That looks really confusing and I am not getting the message you are trying to convey. What presumes a female is healthy!?!? What does talking on the phone with a guy have to do with the female mental health!?!?
You'reasian Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 Title says all. Say you aren't one of those metro/trendy/artsy guys. Do you call your significant other often just to talk? Or do you let your significant other call you solely just to talk? Now of course everybody calls their significant other just to talk sometimes, but how often do guys do it vs. girls. Not the metro/trendy/artsy type - hell, not even sure if I fit into a category How much I call a gf/so will be different since I travel for frequently for business. Its good to catch-up when I can and a phone call to say hi or talk about whatever is time well spent.
BubblyPopcorn Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 I wouldn't define a man's "manliness" based on his phone communication preference, I think there are more integral components that would stand out for me. Someone who is kind, attentive, supportive and nurturing but who is also independent from me, robust and solid Nooooo snoring though, it drives me bonkers!
Trialbyfire Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 A ten year-old boy worries about peer pressure. A real man does what he wants to do, within ethical boundaries.
gd26 Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 BTW, the same can be said for men. I can say with absolute confidence that lack of emotional intimacy affected my sex drive and caused me to look for that emotional intimacy elsewhere. I wasn't healthy psychologically at that time. I stayed. Wrong. Hi Carhill, I don't know your personal situation, so I apologize if this has been repeated before. But if you are looking for another relationship while still being married to your wife... I think you should end your marriage FIRST (through divorce) before beginning another. Or if you are not willing to divorce, then focus on your wife completely and forget about looking for new women. It is not fair to either your wife or the next person for you to be juggling more than one relationship.
carhill Posted April 29, 2009 Posted April 29, 2009 Absolutely aware of that and am reciting history for theraputic effect. We've had over a year of MC and she concluded that she can't provide me with the type and level of intimacy I need, of which this topic was a part. I resolved my EA. Barring any changes, D is proceeding.
Mahatma Posted April 30, 2009 Posted April 30, 2009 Of course real men call their significant others just to talk. That's been my experience at least, and I don't date metros or prissy boys. I like real manly guys that play sports and shave and snore. I play sports, work out, shave, and snore from time to time. This is not what the differences are... I just care about my appearance. How I dress, clean teeth, clean look. ...and that would be the definition of a metrosexual. "Metrosexual is a neologism of the 2000s generally applied to heterosexual men with a strong concern for their appearance, and/or whose lifestyles display attributes stereotypically attributed to gay men." - wiki.
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