Your Favourite Smile Posted April 25, 2009 Posted April 25, 2009 Im so confused that im not going to title my thread until ive finished typing the problem... Im currently out of a relationship with a long term boyfriend of mine, but we have had various split ups in the past, always resulting in the two of us getting back together. There wasnt really a clear, big reason for this recent split up, i guess it was due to a lack of communication. It stemmed from me asking him why he didnt talk to me on instant messenger and he later on told me that it was getting to him that i was miserable. So i didnt talk to him after this, i figured he needed space. There was a party on last week and i knew he would be there, and because i hadnt talked to him since the previous incident i made a conscious decision to not talk to him at the party. I thought it would lessen the awkwardness and i guess it did for that short time. I did get drunk.. and decided that night to text him to tell him that i loved him but the relationship was off. I thought this was what he wanted.. A few days ago after the party he texted me so i guessed he wanted a conversation when i was sober. He asked me how things were etc and seemed very interested in talking.. it was fine. But the thing is, i needed to know how he felt about the relationship and so i asked him a few days later. He said he didnt know, and it was best that we were friends for the time being. But im not sure whether he means this for the purposes of getting the relationship healthy again, or whether he wants the easy way out of the relationship.. like ive known some people to do. I just dont want to feel a fool for hanging around if he doesnt want the relationship to work. I do want the relationship back, i just dont know whether he does.. Will it take time or? I hope someone can make things clearer for me..
loser101 Posted April 25, 2009 Posted April 25, 2009 you have huge, massive reason for your break up: communication issues. you don't talk to each other, you 'guess'. you guess what he thinks, he guesses what you think. that's not a relationship. you have to think long and hard why the two of you can't talk to eachother and why you would give him space assuming that's what he wants instead of asking him what he wants. are you scared to hear it from him so you make pre-emptive moves instead? it is pretty much what your post is about
Author Your Favourite Smile Posted April 26, 2009 Author Posted April 26, 2009 Yeah, you're right.. Well i know one thing, at the present time neither of us are ready to go back to a relationship. I did ask him what he wanted and he said he didnt know, before saying that him and i should be friends for the time being. I need time to get my head together
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