chutzpah89 Posted April 22, 2009 Posted April 22, 2009 Hey all Some people may have read my previous posts, but to fill some of you all in...I've been with my boyfriend for a little over 2 years now. 1.5 of those years has been long distance. We've gone through a lot together, but always stayed true. I see him about once a month for a weekend or so, and he graduates next month...only a couple weeks away. I'm so excited because I never thought that day would come. I'm very happy However, I'm currently living with my father who just got evicted from his house. He has no job and is clinically depressed. His Sister has told him she'd rent her house out to him, and there is enough room for my sister and I. However, the house is very small, it's all the way across town from my job (nurse aid) and I went to look at it today, and I absolutely hate it. The walls are cracked, the carpet is stained undescribabley, and its all around unstable. I don't think I could be happy there. I make about a grand a month...which isn't much, I know. I only work part time because of school (going for my RN degree) I've told my longtime boyfriend of my dillema and he immediatley offered to get an apartment with me. Which sounds like a very reasonable solution, but I'm having many doubts. He and I will go from seeing each other once a month, to living together. I'm sure we'd be fine...we know each other in and out. We only fight when he's away. We love each other so much. And if he was to move in eith me and help pay rent (he already has a job lined up here for when he gets back next month) then I could still go to school. If not, then I'll either have to stick it out with my dad for a couple more years in that cruddy house, or buy a place of my own and put school on hold. I just don't know what to do. I'm scared that moving in my boyfriend will ruin out relationship. When he offered it, I immediately turned down the offer, saying I'd like to be engaged before that ever happens. But that won't happen for quite a while I'm sure...we're both only 20 years old. What would you do in this situation? I'd really appreciate the advice! Thanks!
alphamale Posted April 22, 2009 Posted April 22, 2009 i think you should live with your dad, finish school and fix up the house. you'll have plenty of time later on for relationships and all that crap.
BobSacamento Posted April 22, 2009 Posted April 22, 2009 I would stay with my father until I could support myself and get my own place.
Enema Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 I echo Bobby ^^ You should both live alone, in your own place before living together. Everyone needs to experience it.
Sibyl Vane Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 Do not move in together. It will be enough of an adjustment seeing each other constantly, let things settle at least before you even consider moving in together.
jadelil25 Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 Because you are on here asking this question it is clear that you are not ready to move in together. I think that you should be there for your dad, family should come first and he needs you. I think you should all move in to the house as a family and make a point out of doing it up and it will also give your dad something to focus on. I have been depressed and the last thing you need is the people you love leaving you and you need things to focus on. Also because you hardly see this man you are with moving in before spending more and more time together is not a good move. You need to work on the amount of time you have together i.e to 3 times a week and work it from there.
lovestruck818 Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 Hey all Some people may have read my previous posts, but to fill some of you all in...I've been with my boyfriend for a little over 2 years now. 1.5 of those years has been long distance. We've gone through a lot together, but always stayed true. I see him about once a month for a weekend or so, and he graduates next month...only a couple weeks away. I'm so excited because I never thought that day would come. I'm very happy However, I'm currently living with my father who just got evicted from his house. He has no job and is clinically depressed. His Sister has told him she'd rent her house out to him, and there is enough room for my sister and I. However, the house is very small, it's all the way across town from my job (nurse aid) and I went to look at it today, and I absolutely hate it. The walls are cracked, the carpet is stained undescribabley, and its all around unstable. I don't think I could be happy there. I make about a grand a month...which isn't much, I know. I only work part time because of school (going for my RN degree) I've told my longtime boyfriend of my dillema and he immediatley offered to get an apartment with me. Which sounds like a very reasonable solution, but I'm having many doubts. He and I will go from seeing each other once a month, to living together. I'm sure we'd be fine...we know each other in and out. We only fight when he's away. We love each other so much. And if he was to move in eith me and help pay rent (he already has a job lined up here for when he gets back next month) then I could still go to school. If not, then I'll either have to stick it out with my dad for a couple more years in that cruddy house, or buy a place of my own and put school on hold. I just don't know what to do. I'm scared that moving in my boyfriend will ruin out relationship. When he offered it, I immediately turned down the offer, saying I'd like to be engaged before that ever happens. But that won't happen for quite a while I'm sure...we're both only 20 years old. What would you do in this situation? I'd really appreciate the advice! Thanks! If you want to marry the guy one day, don't move in with him...until you get the ring. I have seen way too many relationships break up b/c the couple moved in together prior to engagement...ultimately leading to the man never proposing and her walking away. When ya think about it, it really makes a lot of sense. If you are living with your boyfriend, it's like you are married anyway, so where is in the incentive for him to marry you? Just my opinion anyway.
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