cat-power Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 In my experience the guys that move heaven and earth in the beginning...coming off real strong...are of the "dissapearing" kind. Maybe that's whats going on ?
Trialbyfire Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 In my experience the guys that move heaven and earth in the beginning...coming off real strong...are of the "dissapearing" kind. Maybe that's whats going on ?There's a difference between men who move heaven and earth and those who come on strong, then disappear. The latter will be inconsistent, once they hook you, where the former continues forward momentum. Keep your eyes, ears and empathy ports wide open.
Ruby Slippers Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 Please help me understand how ladies think about men they are interested in: would you be all over him? Would you play hard to get, and why? Would you test him to see if he's up to stuff? Is there some interest-level scale of types? If I am interested, I will be responsive to his calls and invitations. If I am not interested, I won't. Simple as that. I never call or initiate dates in the early stages, regardless of my level of interest.
Isolde Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 I think men CAN have lukewarm interest towards a girl. It's happened to me before, where he was clearly physically attracted but didn't want to date me.
You'reasian Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 Don't confuse women who are playing hard to get, with the ones who are inherently hard to get. One is a gamer, the other is someone who's careful about who she gets involved with. Well said - very sage wisdom
You'reasian Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 There's a difference between men who move heaven and earth and those who come on strong, then disappear. The latter will be inconsistent, once they hook you, where the former continues forward momentum. Keep your eyes, ears and empathy ports wide open. I am guilty of coming on strong and disappearing. The reason being is that the girl I was with said that I was more interested in her, then she was interested in me. Straight forward and honest - the best in my opinion. For her to say that I just disappeared for no reason (and dated elsewhere) leads me to believe that she's not intune to her social intelligence.
Isolde Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 Also, I find it somewhat disconcerting that some men won't ask a girl for a second date if she doesn't explicitly make it clear she's interested. Women just don't do that in the very beginning of dating. I know this is a lot of pressure on you guys, but in the long run, I think you'd be better off assuming girls are interested until they prove otherwise.
You'reasian Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 Also, I find it somewhat disconcerting that some men won't ask a girl for a second date if she doesn't explicitly make it clear she's interested. Women just don't do that in the very beginning of dating. . I think we go elsewhere under the assumption that our time and energy are better spent elsewhere - we watch your actions first and then hear you later - which is why you often accuse us of not listening Your actions sometimes say different things than what you are verbally saying. Then when we call you on something you said, you shift interpretations or deny saying it. But you all aren't like this. Cool, kind and no-BS attracts we guys who give a damn all the time
39388 Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 Also, I find it somewhat disconcerting that some men won't ask a girl for a second date if she doesn't explicitly make it clear she's interested. Women just don't do that in the very beginning of dating. I know this is a lot of pressure on you guys, but in the long run, I think you'd be better off assuming girls are interested until they prove otherwise. As long as I got some kind of hint that she may be interested, I'd be ready to ask for a second date.
nothappyjan Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 I'll try: 0 Creeped out by, and want to get away from asap. 1. Not particularly keen on, but can tolerate being in the company of for a couple of hours so long as others are present 2. No noticeable chemistry, but like and would be friends with. 3. Chemistry, but too many doubts about individual to encourage romantic overtures. 4. Find attractive. Would be responsive to overtures despite one or two red flags - but with caution. Would not pursue if I suspected a sudden loss of interest. 5. Find attractive, like very much and have a generally positive, trusting feeling towards. In the event of a sudden apparent loss of interest, would make one effort to make contact in case there had been some misunderstanding. Lol i love this scale, its sooo true for me now i just need to meet more guys who are 5's and less 0's hahah
lino Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 I know this is a lot of pressure on you guys, but in the long run, I think you'd be better off assuming girls are interested until they prove otherwise. haha no way! It's having that mentality in the past which brought me to a site like this. If girls want us to be genuine with em they have to throw something back our way too
Chicago_Guy Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 Also, I find it somewhat disconcerting that some men won't ask a girl for a second date if she doesn't explicitly make it clear she's interested. Women just don't do that in the very beginning of dating. I know this is a lot of pressure on you guys, but in the long run, I think you'd be better off assuming girls are interested until they prove otherwise. If I like a girl but she doesn't act like she likes me, it does make her less attractive. I think that is human nature. I have some met women over the past couple years whom seemed to like me and I got their phone numbers. However, when I attempted to call them, they didn't answer the phone or call me back; instead, I received a text message and set up a date that way. I thought that was very annoying and made them seem disinterested. I wouldn't see a girl like that after the first date unless she made it very clear that she was interested in me.
Author colosseum Posted April 24, 2009 Author Posted April 24, 2009 haha no way! It's having that mentality in the past which brought me to a site like this. If girls want us to be genuine with em they have to throw something back our way too Yay! I second this very much. There's a difference between men who move heaven and earth and those who come on strong, then disappear. The latter will be inconsistent, once they hook you, where the former continues forward momentum. Keep your eyes, ears and empathy ports wide open. I am guilty of coming on strong and disappearing. I don't understand these notions; coming on strong then disappearing, and moving heaven and earth. Is the former when you show a girl a lot of interest but move on quickly because you don't think she likes you back, while the latter is that you spend all your time trying to win one girl by moving heaven and earth? If that's the case I would much rather come on strong and disappear when the girl isn't giving me anything to work with. We're not thick-headed; ladies are usually way too subtle/unclear to us.
39388 Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 I am guilty of coming on strong and disappearing. Game playing by men. I have some met women over the past couple years whom seemed to like me and I got their phone numbers. However, when I attempted to call them, they didn't answer the phone or call me back; instead, I received a text message and set up a date that way. I thought that was very annoying and made them seem disinterested. I wouldn't see a girl like that after the first date unless she made it very clear that she was interested in me. Game playing by women.
Trialbyfire Posted April 24, 2009 Posted April 24, 2009 I don't understand these notions; coming on strong then disappearing, and moving heaven and earth. Is the former when you show a girl a lot of interest but move on quickly because you don't think she likes you back, while the latter is that you spend all your time trying to win one girl by moving heaven and earth? If that's the case I would much rather come on strong and disappear when the girl isn't giving me anything to work with. We're not thick-headed; ladies are usually way too subtle/unclear to us. Heaven and earth guys come on strong to begin with and continue coming on strong because they're not pretending to be someone else or are flakes. They're honestly invested. A guy who comes on strong to begin with, then disappears without a trace, without any discussion, is not only a fake, he's a rude flake.
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