ItsMe Posted April 21, 2009 Posted April 21, 2009 This is just my little rant because I always feel a bit better when i've gone on this . Don't really know why this is bothering me, been 3 months pretty much, NC & all that, having fun with friends & stuff, but I still see him every week at climbing which is like yeh fine, I climb with other friends now so s'all good. But this week I caught him like looking at me from across the room, & it was like that 'i miss you' kind of look..He looked away as soon as I noticed & I ignored it, but now its niggling away at me (lol do I sound crazy?) but yeh, I dunno, its just bugging me, like if he wants to say something he should just say it or send me an email or somthing (see him everyday at college too prettymuch, just in passing though), or if he misses me I feel like he doesn't have the right to miss me, he ended it, his fault. I do want to be friends with him, but I know I can't until until im like completly over him..Getting there I spose (picturing myself with other guys now ><, (that silly little husband picture has turned into a faceless man again ), bit of an annoying set back atm & over nothing which is gheyy! Blahhhhhhhh Hmm Well yeh pretty much it, I dont talk to my friends about it anymore really, they think im over him more or less I think, theyll always be there for me, but I just feel like I've told them enough, so i'll rant on here instead. Ohh & why do I still love him after all this time & what he did to me?! Thats the most annoying part, i'd NEVER go back to him because he gave up on us once & he'll just do it again, but still my god this is dragging on! (I proably sound impatient lol but shh), I know "time heals all" & all that but time also drags ON & ON & ON when you feel like this, even though most of the time (with chums or working) im not thinking about this & im happy, but theres always that like ache feeling, im getting used to it now, I honestly can't remmeber what it was like to not have it there:/ oo this was longer than expected, ahh well, my 2 cents for ya' all (: Ohh no, one more thing, It bugs me that hes been nice to me! Lol, I ask for space & he has given me it, hes given me no reason to get anrgy at him, but half of me wants him to text me or something so I can be the one to reject him! Arghh Ohh another thing! (Lol ALOT longer now ) I keep having dreams (very vivid ones) he never ended it or I take him back (the latter bug me more) & theyre insanely horrifying to wake up from D= Now that IS IT! Toodles guys x
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