this ones tough

[good man brokn heart]

i'm a mess but she probally feels worse. I started dating a girl i,ve known for about five years. she 23 and im 32.We were casual friends by way of she worked at the coffee shop i went to. She broke up with her boy friend of four years and we started hanging out more. One thing led to another and we hooked up one night. sounds normal. the problem 1 was i have hsv (not fun)and it was unprotected. I told her about it the next time we hung out. I know a little late.she said she was ok she wanted to get checked out. I said cool let me know when you want to go and i will come.she never did. we kept haveing unprotected sex for three months never missing a day of seeing each other.most likly a reboud.( i know im going to hear it about that but we did.both of us.well guess what?yep she got it.in the mean time i fell in love with her.i know shes young and wants to fly but i also saw in her a very down to earth person who if treated right would nurture a relationship.she started to pull away i got a little insecure and called her a bitch......on her period.god this sounds like ****n' jerry springer.she said she was done. we talked and she said she wanted to go back to just friends.she has a huge heart i know.thats what makes it so hard. we went out to the movies and we started to get close i started telling how sorry i was instead of shutting up she backed up again and said it wasnt going to work.i kept have the urge to comfort her because of the **** i gave her and my own selfish reasons for not wanting to loose her.she said she wanted space.i said i would give her a few weeks. i didnt. i got week and wrote her a text about how sorry i was and bla bla bla. im sure thats what she heard. Later on that night i talked to her on the phone. i told her i loved her but what a suprise she didnt come back she said at one point she felt like it she had a lot of love for me. i should have gave her the time i know. im on day two now.i want her to be happy but im dieing inside. try not to be to critical of me i just need some constructive advise. thanks for reading.i know i sond like the biggest ******* in the world but i am a good guy i was taking pills for hurt back and i wasnt my self. i stoped takeing them and tring to better my life so i can show her im not the man i once was i was going through a tough time. I want to make up all the wrong but i cant.