PinkRibbon Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 NC is great when you want to heal and move on. But what if you don't want to go without the other person. What if you would do anything to get them back? Has anyone here actually successfully been able to get their other back and how?
nemo007 Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 I'm curious about this also. Its very hard to not have any contact with someone you still love!
jessicasilver Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 its hard but if your the one who got dumped the worse thing you can do is still call and text, email the dumper!!! they need time and space to realise what they want... give it to them and at the same time try move on... dont wait around and expect them to one day regret their decision because it might not happen find new friends and whenever you feel tempted to contact your ex, text or ring them instead!!
LadyV Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 My XBF and I have been going through this Yo-Yo....wanting to be in one another's lives, then pulling away, It has been him 2 times, and me 2 times doing so. It's hard to do the whole NC thing, but it is a MUST in my honest opinion. Do I miss my ex?? Oh yes. I sure do, but the more I talk to him, the more I realize that the issues are still there, and the contact is just a temporay filler to help deal to feed the whole "I miss you" void. I walked away this last time, told him I just can't do it. It isn't fair for me to hang on, when I can find happiness. Also, I asked him if he really loved me and he said, "More than you will ever know." I felt really un-easy hearing this because I do not find it true at all. I guess it is just my way of realizing the facts...he is just saying that because he misses me. I am taking this time to focus on me. It is a great feeling to wake up and know I am in control of what I want. If I wanted to beg for him to come back, I would do so...but I don't, just to save myself the sanity as well as the heart break. Also, the thought of being with him again, brings everything else to mind; the way he treated me, the way we had our issues, the yo-yo and I just don't want it anymore. If you want to contact your ex, or they contact you, be reminded that it will only put you back to square 1. This is what I found. It's the cycle starting all over again....You have to be the one to choose if you want to continue the cycle or just cut it before it begins. I can see with all my past relationships how this happens. Even with my most recent one, it has been the same thing...I hate it, but it is up to me to answer back, as well as stop myself from going further...hence, ending the cycle...and it is a vicious one at times.....
Author PinkRibbon Posted April 20, 2009 Author Posted April 20, 2009 NC is soooo hard but I know I can do it because I have done it before. But do I really want to??? To me that is giving up on fighting for what I want. I want him back and I can not figure out how to do it. So does anyone every really get someone back and how? NC? Just seems like NC would not work.
rainbowbrite Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 he dumped me. i did nc for 3 full months after senden a nasty email of how i hated him and wanted nothing to do with him. after a while i started to miss him, and figured i have nothing to lose by giving him a call. so i did, as it turns out we ended up talking for hours. and then he started to contact me almost everyday, and the other day he picked me up and took me on a date and we had an awesome time, and he wants to see me again. but all it took was a phone call. if its meant to be itll happen
LadyV Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 You may want him back, but the question is, does HE want YOU back?
Author PinkRibbon Posted April 20, 2009 Author Posted April 20, 2009 hahhahaha no he doesn't want me back and if he did he wouldn't have broken up.
LadyV Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 If this man doesn't want you back, then why would you want him back? Just curious...is it a matter of having a hard time moving on?
Author PinkRibbon Posted April 20, 2009 Author Posted April 20, 2009 It has only been a week and I love him.
LoveLace Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 If it's that clear he wouldn't take you back, there is no sense in wondering how to do it, because there probably is no such thing. If you really want to try anyway, just ask. Under what circumstances might you take me back? If he says none, then NC or anything else is a lost cause and it's time to move on. Then NC happens because it's just over, not because it might get him back.
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