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Boyfriend went to Argentina and brought condoms but claims he never cheated

phoenixangel

By phoenixangel
in Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy

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phoenixangel New Member

phoenixangel

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Hi there, I've been reading posts on this forum for a while, but I never posted before until now, so I hope people will be understanding!

 

My boyfriend took a 4 week trip to Peru and Argentina with his two single guy friends and just returned last Monday. I went to visit him this weekend and found four condoms in his traveling bag. (we never use condoms together since we've been exclusive for almost a year) He says that his neighbor gave him the four condoms "just in case". At that point, I was furious because I couldn't figure out why he would need condoms UNLESS he was intending to play hooky with some new girl down in South America.

 

So, he tried to make excuses like "it was for my friends since I knew they wouldn't pack them" (this might be plausible, but seriously, his friends can pack for themselves). He also brought up the "just in case" excuse again, stating that it's something that he always does for safety's sake.

 

He also says that he didn't cheat while he was down there and that he would only travel in the future if I go along (which I can believe...or can I? In any case, I was stupid and gave in to his excuses). However, now I'm beginning to rethink it all since maybe I should be more worried.

 

Please help! Would you believe his excuses? Or if not, would you forgive him if he didn't cheat but still brought condoms "just in case"? I really want to stay with him, but if I keep on having these trust issues, I'm afraid I'll go insane with anxiety all the time.

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phoenixangel New Member

phoenixangel

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Some more information, if it helps:

 

I'm 21 and he's 28. We've been in a LTR since last August (there's a 7-hour commute for me since I always take the bus up to San Fran from Los Angeles). Usually, I travel up to his place, but he offered to come down to LA in two weeks.

LucreziaBorgia Established Member

LucreziaBorgia

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People get condoms because they intend to get laid. Whether or not he got laid isn't the issue. The fact that he even considered it is.

 

I'm not surprised you are having trust issues. I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him.

Bejita463 Established Member

Bejita463

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Please help! Would you believe his excuses?

 

I don't. They are flimsy and do not stand up to any real scrutiny. In this particular case I would say intent is as bad as deed, especially considering there is no way to prove there was never more than 4 condoms.

Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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These 4 were what was left from a box of 25.. :laugh:

 

come on now.. you got to be kidding me.. if you believe him, then you're very naive..

 

Single guys, all this time on their own.. yes he had a good time.. sorry.. but that's reality.. and that's life.. :o

samspade Established Member

samspade

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If he was anywhere near Cuzco (near Machu Picchu) he got laid. Honestly, if I had a gf and I went on a trip like this, I would probably break up with her just in case.

Art_Critic Established Member

Art_Critic

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People get condoms because they intend to get laid. Whether or not he got laid isn't the issue. The fact that he even considered it is.

 

I agree with LB..

 

Time to rethink this relationship and it's future..

Dexter Morgan Established Member

Dexter Morgan

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Please help! Would you believe his excuses?

 

$#%$# NO! He had condoms for a reason, and it wasn't for his friend and it wasn't to bring home to you.

 

He had condoms in case he found himself with another woman.

 

Ditch the pr!ck.

moman Established Member

moman

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(I've been to these countries, so let that guide my reply)

 

He was probably thinking about the common belief about hot women in these areas and packed just in case to experience a time with the guys. Upon arrival, he realized that not only are the women not as hot as one is lead to believe, but the only sure-fire way to get laid is to pay for hookers.

 

Coming home disappointed, he made up a story that he packed for his friends.

MissConduct Established Member

MissConduct

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He most definitely bought them for himself, whether he used them or not is completely irrelevant because if you are in a committed relationship there should be 0 intent to own condoms, for any situation. :mad:

 

He is full of it, HE bought them and he more than likely did use them.

Sorry to say but don't make excuses for him and don't let his extremely lame excuses fool you.

samsungxoxo Established Member

samsungxoxo

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Wow this guy is full of BS, off course he did got laid with another woman else why would he be bringing condoms on his bag knowing that he is on a long distance relationship.

 

Even he didn't cheated and what he was saying were to be true that's still a good reason to dump him because it means he even had bad intentions throughout the relationship. Dump the scumbag.

boxing123 Established Member

boxing123

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Why do you think 3 single guys are going to South America in the first place?

 

Let's say he did not have condoms in his bag.. Then you would believe him? lol

mr.dream merchant Established Member

mr.dream merchant

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Don't know if he got laid or not, never will. But he did have the intention to, the condoms in his bag are proof of that.

DunnoWhat Established Member

DunnoWhat

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He intended to cheat. It's up to you how you deal with it now. I'd probably leave my GF if that happened.

moman Established Member

moman

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Hold on everyone, why is it assumed he used the condoms?

 

Have you been to these countries? U.S. guys believe that it's super easy to get laid down there and it's just not true. It's much easier here (U.S.), at least 10x easier. Of course, there are hookers and such, but we have no proof he used condoms.

 

Now, I agree that he had intentions to cheat.

DunnoWhat Established Member

DunnoWhat

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Now, I agree that he had intentions to cheat.

 

Thats what we're saying. It's the same as cheating basically.

MissConduct Established Member

MissConduct

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Hold on everyone, why is it assumed he used the condoms?

 

.

 

At this point it really doesn't matter if he used them or not, if someone goes on an all guy trip leaving a g/f behind and has condoms in his suitcase the implication is there. That's all she needs to know. Pfft "had them for a friend" a bunch of crap!! He must think she was born yesterday. :rolleyes:

 

He used them. Southamerican women may be hard to get but there are tons of travellers from all over the planet. Who cares if latin women are not easy there are plenty parts of the world where the women are easy and on vacation and anything goes.

samspade Established Member

samspade

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A person who respects his SO would never engage in behavior that could even be MISTAKEN for cheating. The fact that your bf packed condoms is a huge slap in your face, whether he nailed a South American girl or not.

 

And South American women may or may not be hard to get, depending on where you go...but Cuzco in Peru is a gringo's paradise from what I've read. In any case, three guys, a box of condoms, and a continent filled with latinas...do the math. This is the kind of trip a single person takes.

MichelleS1983 Established Member

MichelleS1983

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Let's face it - the guy is single (for all intents and purposes) and only 28. He has a long distance girlfriend that he only sees when SHE makes the effort to come visit him which is pretty sh*itty to begin with. So it's painfully obvious that he's not NEARLY as invested in this relationship as Phoenix is.

 

He doesn't sound like a prize - you just sound like a convenience to him.

 

Secondly, the guy's a tool, plain and simple. He had every intention of getting laid as often as he could while he was down there. I guess he'd have you believe he's the "condom police" and had to make sure safe sex was available to his 'buddies,' and that's where the condoms came from, right?

 

He's a lying jerk. I hope he got jungle rot.

reservoirdog1 Established Member

reservoirdog1

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He also brought up the "just in case" excuse again, stating that it's something that he always does for safety's sake.

This, in my opinion, is all the answer you need.

 

He could've at least covered his tracks better if he'd left it that his neighbour had given them to him. That would be a bit far-fetched for sure, but this... If he was trying to cover his tracks, I'm surprised he was dumb enough to say that.

 

He "always [takes condoms on trips] for safety's sake"? The "safety" part being, "having sex with somebody while away"? He's basically saying that, if an opportunity to cheat came along, he might well go through with it. What other possible meaning could there be? He could get raped and he's got them so he can make sure the rapist armours up?

 

I think his whole story is BS, but that one line takes the cake.

You'reasian Established Member

You'reasian

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That's too bad.

 

Yeah, I'd hope that my gf would bring condoms though if she went out, got trashed with the guy friend at work she flirts with and then crashes at his house.....:rolleyes::laugh:

 

just make sure they're doing it safely.

Dumbledore Established Member

Dumbledore

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He's just looking after his friends - it's no big deal. Also, if they were the flavoured kind, then they're ideal for transporting drugs.

era Established Member

era

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He's just looking after his friends - it's no big deal.

 

Right - he's soooo considerate of others :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

Dumbledore Established Member

Dumbledore

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- he's soooo considerate of others

That's what friends do. Look after each other. Not everyone is as selfish as you seem to think.

Els Established Member

Els

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So, he tried to make excuses like "it was for my friends since I knew they wouldn't pack them" (this might be plausible, but seriously, his friends can pack for themselves). He also brought up the "just in case" excuse again, stating that it's something that he always does for safety's sake.

 

Am I the only one who thinks that no straight males EVER pack condoms for their friends?!

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