nas Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 i obsess about his ex. my bf and i 50 and 48 years old have been together 3 years. he brings me flowers bi weekly. he always calls or texts me when we are apart (which is when we are at work) he trats me like a queen and show his love and apreciation in all the ways i have always dreamed of. and yet i obsess about his ex. he permited me to eliminate her form his e mail, has told his kids that she is not to step foot in their home. and i still obsess.help.
RecordProducer Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 i obsess about his ex. my bf and i 50 and 48 years old have been together 3 years. he brings me flowers bi weekly. he always calls or texts me when we are apart (which is when we are at work) he trats me like a queen and show his love and apreciation in all the ways i have always dreamed of. and yet i obsess about his ex. he permited me to eliminate her form his e mail, has told his kids that she is not to step foot in their home. and i still obsess.help.You don't deserve this man. You're going to eat his heart until you spit it out and completely erase his identity. He let YOU eliminate her from HIS email? He has children with this woman, for god's sake. What's next? Eliminating his children, too? I know a woman like you who eliminated her husband's family members (including an ex-wfe), one by one - everybody who doesn't kiss the ground she walks on. All she does is trying hard to justify her mean actions. She is obsessed too and never happy, even though she has everything in life.
boldjack Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 You need to treat this man better. He shouldn't have to justify anything to you or anyone. He treats you great and you repay him with obsession and mistrust. If you don't start treating him better someone will come along who will.
Author nas Posted April 20, 2009 Author Posted April 20, 2009 thank you for your imput. i am lookig for help though, not to be critizised. his children love me and i get along with them very well. the girl recently asked me to help her pick out her graduation dress.i know i am being unresonable but, i cant seem to help myself,i shoud say that i treat him VERY well and he says to never have been happier. when i am not obsessing i too am very happy.i need to be able to let go. this is what i would like help with,
shoesies05 Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 what about her are you obsessing over? what bugs you about her? im sure ur bf has had many previous gf's- not just that wife. So why focus on her? And im sure you've had previous bfs, if not husbands... the past is the past- let it be. He's with YOU now, focus on that. As for the email- dont do that. He is his own person, and you should allow him to talk to whomever he wants... his ex especially. They have kids together and obviously are going to need to be in touch with one another. Besides, if you really care about him- wouldnt you want him to have good relationships with others, rather than bad ones? He's doing so much for you, I'd say try and do more for him. I really want to know why you obsess over it though... might help give better advice on you getting past this, because I can see that you want to.
Author nas Posted April 24, 2009 Author Posted April 24, 2009 i don´t know why i obsess with her. yes other girl firends and yes i have had b'friends and marriage and kids of my own. i think part of it is that my current boyfriend is the best, kindest man i have had and i hate the thought of losing him. shortly after we started dating she tried to get him back when she heard from others how happy he seemed. also, she cheated on him badly and left him ***practically abanoned her children too. i am a very loyal friend and if anyone were to do that to one of my friends i would try to help them be free of such a person. she once made an attempt to befriend me but, though i was not rude i would have none of it.i understand that when there is an emergency they must communicate. but, their children are adults (although they still live with him) so, i see no need for her to be in constant communication with him. i read somewhere recently that to get over an obsession you need to get another better obsession. what do you think?
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