Ex-Girlfriend Pregnant from an Affair with Married Guy...Bust him?

[cjjoy]

Okay here's my situation. After being together for 9 years, the last two of which were all about her coping with breast cancer, my girlfriend had a crisis and we broke up. I know I was there for her the whole time. Anyway, to complicate things she had an affair with a married man who we both knew. A lot of pain there.

 

Recently, she admitted to me that she's pregnant with his child and intends to keep the baby despite that he's turning his back on her to preserve his marriage ( His wife is currently pregnant as well). I am as angry at her betrayal of me as she is of her ex-lover's.

 

I've resisted the urge to bust him to his wife in revenge so far.

 

Now, my ex is calling me wanting to be good friends...Am I a sucker? What are anyone's feelings on my situation?

[TaraMaiden]

First of all, I am sorry, but because of her being your ex- you have no say in the matter.

The problem remains in the hands of your ex-girlfriend.

 

Does this man know that your ex- is pregnant with his child?

The whole situation may well explode anyway, when she names him as the father and seeks child support.....

I presume she is going to do this?

 

She would be very foolish not to.

And the child is not an object. It is a living, breathing human being who deserves to know who his parent is.

if only for any medical conditions or situations.... can you imagine the baby having any health problems and not being able to refer to the father for medical information?

[somedude81]

Since TaraMaiden, covered a lot of stuff I'm going to add

 

Now, my ex is calling me wanting to be good friends...Am I a sucker? What are anyone's feelings on my situation?

You're done with her.

 

Your only responsibility is to make sure she doesn't name you as father for some reason.

[Enema]

Now, my ex is calling me wanting to be good friends...Am I a sucker? What are anyone's feelings on my situation?

 

Don't be her backup plan.

 

You're done with her. The best revenge you can have is to leave her with nothing and no-one.

[carhill]

How were things prior to her cancer? What's her prognosis?

 

What do *you* want?

 

This is a complex situation and there's likely a whole lot which isn't being said. Are you a sucker if you offer friendship (not intimacy or romantic love)? As long as you're hurting, you will have difficulty with that offer IMO. You'll have to decide what is healthy for you.

[Lucky_One]

Recently, she admitted to me that she's pregnant with his child and intends to keep the baby despite that he's turning his back on her to preserve his marriage

 

All I know is that I have never had to go through treatments for breast cancer.

 

And if I had gone through this treatment and still retained my fertility, then I believe I would keep any pregnancy, regardless of paternity of the child.

 

I don't know her age or her child situation now, but this could very well be her last chance to have a baby.

 

An afterthought - I would probably NOT keep the baby if i was in frail or ill health as a single parent, or if my prognosis was dim (Stage 3-4), or if I still had to undergo chemo radiation for my own life. But if my doctors felt that my prognosis was very good after treatments were ended and if I was feeling healthy and strong, then yes, I would keep the baby.

 

Cancer is enough to scare the pants off any sane person, and "kissing death" as it were would make me treasure that life inside me, even more.

[Chrome Barracuda]

I uld definitely drop a dime on the ex, and screw her over. Because in the end the BW needs to know her husband is catting around with OW and getting them pregnant! STD's? anyone?

 

And after you do that you go NC with EVERYONE!

 

Press the nuke button and high tail it outta town. Because in the end your better off. You was a giver and she was a taker. Her purpose on this earth is to take from others but never return. She had cnacer and you was there for her and she used your kindness against you.

 

...Now you know better. Let the married OM support her ass. He's worth it huh?