longhairedgal Posted April 18, 2009 Posted April 18, 2009 OK, here's the deal. These other 2 women co-workers & I (not kids-we're all in our 50's) usually meet for lunch. HOWEVER (using fake names here), Kelly will contact (IM or email) Jamie & then Jamie will contact me - "ready to go to lunch"? Fine & dandy. But this past week, no one contacted me & when I went to the lunchroom, there they were-& J said, "Oh I'm sorry! I'm just so busy". Too busy for a 1 second IM??? Of course I said No problem-I just can assume we'll meet at this time & place unless I hear otherwise. Then K says, yeah you are always late anyway. I got the feeling they wouldn't have cared if I came or not. Why doesn't Kelly just email or IM ME at the same time as Jamie? So anyway. Today J was off so I IM'd K & asked if she wanted to go to lunch after her meeting (I also emailed her). I didn't hear back for a long while so finally just IMd again & said, I am going to lunch now-have a good weekend etc. Then she IMs back, Thanks, you too. I said OH-you are back-want to go to lunch-or did you already? She said Yeah I already did-I went out - sorry forgot to tell you. Well thanks a lot!!!! This is not the first time she's done that. I find it so rude!! I have been a friend to both of them - i.e. buying flowers for their birthdays, etc. & they don't even know when mine IS, much less acknowledge it. The thing that irritates me too is that Kelly will contact me IF no one else is available - any port in a storm! But she couldn't care less if I am alone. They also seem to confide in each other more & leave me out of it although I could be imagining that to some extent. SO, any advice? How do I stop going to lunch with them without appearing as a total idiot?? (Not to say I am NOT one, just don't want it to be so obvious!) What do you do when you feel like the third wheel??
Jade 02 Posted April 19, 2009 Posted April 19, 2009 Hi Longhairedgal They seem kind of two faced to me,Is there anyone else around who you think would enjoy your company? I hate snobs,gosh the more the merrier in my book. Screw em they probabaly jealous of something about you,It;s always the giver that get sh*t on.
shoesies05 Posted April 23, 2009 Posted April 23, 2009 Just becom really "busy"... if they really care about going out with you, they will bring up how you are all of a sudden gone from their lives. If not- then no harm is done and you can part ways. Im sorry you are feeling like the 3rd wheel.
casie_0021 Posted April 25, 2009 Posted April 25, 2009 find other gals on your office to go along with you during lunch instead. don't give care about them, besides they don't care...
Solvo Sermo Posted April 26, 2009 Posted April 26, 2009 Live the PPs just said, become really busy. And find some other friends to hang out with. It sounds like you're doing all the work in this friendship and they're taking you for granted. If they're leaving you out, they're probably jealous. Don't waste your time with these people any more. Hugs xxx
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