whitney Posted April 18, 2009 Posted April 18, 2009 I would try to sum this up, but it would be difficult. I have been with a man for the past 5 years. We have a four year old son. He was engaged 2 years previous to us meeting. He broke it off with her and he met me. At the time, I told him that I was not comfortable in being a rebound relationship. He stated to me that this is not what that was, but I decided to let him go. About 8 months down the line, we saw each other and started to talk again. Eventually it turned into a relationship, but his ex girlfriend is always around in some fashion. He has a couple of nephews, who are more like his sons because he spends a lot of time with them. They were very close to her children. Unbeknownst to me in the beginning, the children still saw each other. I just now found out how close these children are. I am very uncomfortable, especially in the fact that these kids have their pictures on his wall, along with his nephews, but there is no picture of my son. I have expressed my discomfort several times, and I have told him how I felt, but he says that this is just insecurity and that it's me who he is with. He has also told me that she is never around him and is not bothered with him at all, but it seems to me that this relationship that he and his nephews have with her kids is fostered through him. I just don't understand it. I don't think that I ever will and he tells me that this could break us up. We had a huge argument today and this is the first time in a long time that I have felt like I really didn't care to try to call and figure things out. (The argument was based on the fact that I was over his house (we do not live together but we had been making plans to find a bigger house for me, him, my daugher and his son) and we had just finished making love, I backed out of his driveway and here his ex comes, walking up to his door. She saw me, but she did not say anything, nor did I. Mind you, he has told me that she has never been over there, and then today he said that she was coming to pick up his nephew. As soon as I drove off, I was upset. I did not call him, but he called me within the next few minutes talking about nothing. I knew that he was trying to probe to find out how I felt I asked him what was going on. That's when it all blew up. I don't know how to feel, or if I really want to deal with this anymore. Any advice or stories are welcomed.
loser101 Posted April 18, 2009 Posted April 18, 2009 that fact that you have been together for 5 years and you don't even live together, plus he has other kids' photos on his wall but not your son's don't sound great. by the way, I think it's great that those kids are so close because it's children that suffer the most when adults break up. I see why the presence of the ex bothers you, however, I have a feeling that your problems here are deeper running than the ex. where is your relationship going? how come you are not living together after all these years yet?
Recommended Posts