Carpe Posted April 15, 2009 Posted April 15, 2009 First Post in this board, had been reading the board for afew days after the breakup just want to know what you guys can say about my situation... I had a relationship with a girl that lasted around 6 months, everything was going perfect until around valentines of this year. She toldme that she wanted to be alone, because she was going thru a very serious problem, she was diagnosed with a ilness that afected the way she regulary ovulates, and she started taking some medications that made her have mood swings. i wasnt very happy about this and always tought there was something else... how wrong was i, we keep contact and we tryed to stay friends during this process, and it sucked badly, i was always pursing her in to tellme what was the real reason and she told me that there wasnt any reason apart from what i already knew, i really bother her, i to what i know i completely messup my chances. she calledme and toldme she wanted to speak to me, and that she had to tell me something good, i was desparate and asked her that she could tellme over the phone, she got really mad and hang the phone on me... i called her back and told her i already knew what she was going to tell me. then she called me crying saying that i have no idea, she wanted to fix things with me but this behavior was just enough for her to know that we dont belong toghter. few days passed and i tryed to cut contact with her, blocked her msn, Facebook, deleted her phone. but she still contacts me, she called me and left a voicemail saying that she had a missed call of mine. that was complete BS i havent call her. i unblocked her msn and we chatted for a little, she toldme some stuff that was going on one her life and that her how her car broke down and that she stayed at her house, and that she also toldme that her father was daignose with Lupus and some other stuff and that she spoke with a friend from high school and she took a coffe with him, and learn that he had pass tru similar things with his father and gave her some good advice. i told her i was very happy for her and that there are somethings that are ment to be other that are not, and that i recently had some aproches from some girls but i am in a situation that i just need some serious alone time. and she freaked out that why i talked to her about other girls and that she "knows" i think this is easy for her, she started fighting with me again. and that i was always trying to hurt her and that was the reason that why she didnt want to give another chance and that her decicion is final. i just told her that i wont fight anymore and that i am sorry for all the trouble i have cause her, i love her too much too keep fighting with her and that it would be best for us to not contact each other, told her good bye and logged off, that was around 11:30PM yesterday... when i woke up in the morning i had a text from her that says "running from your problems doesnt solve them. if that is what you want i will give you all the space you need, i love you very much" she says that she still wants to be friends and nothing more, but why does she when berserk when i talked to her about other girls? the reason we broke up is that she says i dont trust her any advice would be apretiated
Ayla Posted April 16, 2009 Posted April 16, 2009 Hi, The reason she gets upset when you talk about other women is because she still loves you!!!!!! Do you want to be with her? - yes or No - If no, tell her that, explain why and then leave her alone. If yes - then tell her that was well. The work out a way to be together. Did you do any research on her ovary problem? Support her, don't critisise her...she will have massive mood swings (which also prob a contributing factor right now). If you need a little time - tell her that - but do not screw around with her head. Don;t go on other dates. This time is for you. Have you messed up your chances completely - no. But be a little more understanding about her health problem. Research it so that you know more. It affects her hormones massively - which therefore makes her modds more extreme - how do I know cos I have been there too.Do not tell her about other girls - of course that is going to make her upset. Would it make you upset if she told you that there were other guys? How do i know about the who other girl thing - cos I also have been there. My bf broke up with me out of the blue (no signs) and 3 days later he slept with someone else - the hurt he cause is massive and I love him so much - I got really angry. It is the hurt and the thought of you being with someone else that makes her upset.... You can do this - work out what you really want, and then go for it. But either way tell her and give her reasons and be honest...do not just cut her off. Thats hurts too...
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