Seems like I'm too young to not be satisfied with my life with my fiancee, ?

[Amazing]

I'll make this as short as possible without getting too detailed.

 

My fiancee and I met 8 years ago in college. We never had a ton in common other than we really liked (and turned into love) each other. We didn't share many common interest other than watching movies.

 

I was a drinker/partier. She was not.

I had a lot of friends. She had very few.

I loved sex. She could do without it.

 

However, through all the ups and downs, we seemed to have made it. The one thing we never did was live together before buying. Our thought was always that we would end up being together, so why waste money on an apartment when we could save that money, stay with our parents for 3 more years, and buy? Which we did.

 

Now we're in the house, and I'm bored out of my mind. The sex is decent at best, but the hobby thing has finally come into play: We're complete opposites, so when we're not shopping, having sex, or watching TV...I find that there is nothing to do.

 

I feel like I made a mistake by staying with her...tolerating her lack of a sex drive, lack of partying (yes, I know everyone needs to grow up, but even grownups go to parties), and lack of interest in things I like.

 

My life seems just too plain. Sometimes I look at my friends and consider myself normal (none of my friends have exciting lives...simply living with their wife/fiancee and doing yardwork on Saturdays).

 

Do I need to just grow up and accept that this is how life is? Because honestly, I think I'm too young to be bored with my life already.

[Ginger79]

you sound like my situation in some ways but reverse. I'm the social one and my SO's the quiet one. We have other issues but..

 

Someone on the forum said to me, "it's about wanting what you've got, not wanting what you don't."

 

I was a drinker/partier. She was not.

I had a lot of friends. She had very few.

I loved sex. She could do without it.

 

Three lines of interests are not exactly... you know. Do you define yourself by parties you go to? How about having dinner parties at home jointly hosted by you and your partner? There must be 19385789475 things you can do in the world. Have you tried exploring new hobbies with your partner?

 

Another person also told me that if I'm the extrovert, then it must be up to me to get the ball rolling. How about taking her out on surprise dates doing things you enjoy with elements of what she enjoys and vice versa?

 

How about romancing her, surprising her with sexy messages and giving her foot rubs and stuff and see if it leads to sex? I do have a friend who could not be bothered be having sex because she was dysthymic and had pain upon penetration. Do your partner experience any bodily discomfort that could be addressed to increase her joy for sex?

 

Ultimately, you make the decision if you can be happy in your situation. You only know what you know now. But 8 years is a long time and if this is my situation, I'll give it my best shot to inject new life into the relationship. Good luck!