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Our relationship is really slow.


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Posted

Well there really isn't much to it either, were both busy, I know he isn't interested in other women, and we see each other once a week if that. I'm not sure if I should be doing something more.

 

Today my best friend said since it's Easter I should just pop by his house and see what their family is doing. I don't know if that is quite "me". When we're together we usually watch movies, and hang out with his family. We're honestly never really a lone. With my last bf, it was about 50/50 everything else and alone time. His family is really cool and wouldn't mind if I did drop by, but I just don't feel right about doing that. I don't know...

 

I'm not sure what I'm missing! Everything is okay as in there is really nothing to complain about except that we don't see each other so much , but his response is he's busy and he tries to spend as much time as he can with me. Do I just have too much time on my hands? I can't seem to stop thinking about him, I already told him I loved him and he didn't say anything back and said he wants to make sure that he honestly says it when he means it because he has made that mistake before. We've been together for a year and almost 1/2, I need advice as to just keep going? Everything is healthy he treats me great, gentleman, gets a long with the family, is about to graduate, and has been in the same place of employment for years.

 

I'm really shy though. I'm not the kind of person to just drop by..I usually don't plan huge get togethers either, the last one I did was my bday in January. If I do want to do something, its a movie, going out to eat, or just staying in and hanging out with each other. I get anxious and kinda stressed out about people getting along and stuff..

Posted
I already told him I loved him and he didn't say anything back and said he wants to make sure that he honestly says it when he means it because he has made that mistake before

 

He didn't tell you he loved you back? How red can the flag get?:confused: If he's not sure about what he feels for you, then say... is there a relationship here? I think he has pretty much explained the reason for his lack of enthusiasm for more "together time"... I think presenting him with the line: "we need to talk" is very much in oder here. Just my 2 cents.:bunny:

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Posted
He didn't tell you he loved you back? How red can the flag get?:confused: If he's not sure about what he feels for you, then say... is there a relationship here? I think he has pretty much explained the reason for his lack of enthusiasm for more "together time"... I think presenting him with the line: "we need to talk" is very much in oder here. Just my 2 cents.:bunny:

 

I realize this. And am ignoring it until I get enough responses to say that it is indeed red flag worthy of a break up. He's only had one other serious relationship. Then again after the first "talk" I'm not sure if this is actually is one now :eek: sighhh.... so bummed. How long is the waiting game??

Posted

Yes, this is a HUGE red flag.

 

You guys have been together for a year and a half, and he wants to make sure he loves you and to mean it when he says it to you?

 

I'm sorry, but you shouldn't accept that. It's fine that he's busy and tries to spend time with you, but not saying it back to you after that long isn't a good thing. You should have that talk with him about where things stand between you two, if he sees this as a long term relationship! If not, well, he sure isn't going to tell you he loves you.

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Posted

Hmm.. and this isn't some wierd test he's putting me through??

Posted

No, it's not a test. If you want to go hang out with his family without him, by all means go ahead. If not, no biggie. I don't think I would either.

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