alxvln4 Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 i have a quick background story then a couple of questions. ok so here goes... my girlfriend of three and a half years recently broke up with me because she thinks she fell out of love with me. i was completely destroyed for a while. after talking with my friend and looking things up on the internet i started to feel better. i never let her see me sad. i tried not contacting her for awhile but only did that for about a week. two days ago i talked to her and we talked about everything what she has been doing, how she feels, ect. ect. she told me that three days after she broke up with me she made out with someone and she liked it but felt bad. then after that, with the same guy, she lied in bed naked with him. and she called me and felt really bad and really sad. she said she did it because she doesn't want to make him feel bad because he "likes" her. i am completely in love with her still(and i still want to get back together with her, but i also want her to be happy) but i do not push my love on her i said i wanted to be her friend and she said that she would love that. my first question is am i doing the right thing by being her friends with her or should i not contact her for a longer amount of time. should i try and help her with the her new relationship or should i not even talk about it with her? i am sorry if this is a little scattered and doesn't make much sence. its a little hard for me to think straight.
gavinus Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 Stay NC!! My ex dumped me, I saw her, I gave her all the power, she has moved on, learn from my mistakes. By agreeing to support her you are saying its ok to treat me like crap! She has to realize what she has lost and if you keep in contact, she has the best of both worlds, other lovers and your support. I know how you feel, but think on this she may of felt guilty for sleeping with her new man...afterwards!!!! She was not guilty enough to sleep with him in the first place, I am sorry if that sounds cruel, but it is the truth, be strong, post HERE instead of contacting her, stay NC, you are worth more than her! Stay away from her, have some self respect,
LostFocus Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 Gavinus is right. Go back to NC. What she did to you is inexcusable. Find something to keep yourself busy. She will come back when she realizes her mistake.
RecordProducer Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 after talking with my friend she told me that three days after she broke up with me she made out with someone and she liked it but felt bad. then after that, with the same guy, she lied in bed naked with him. and she called me and felt really bad and really sad. she said she did it because she doesn't want to make him feel bad because he "likes" her. I am sorry you GF broke up with you. What was her reason? I don't get the quoted part. You heard this from a friend, right? Your GF felt bad - why? Because it was too soon? Does she still love you? Why won't you tell her you want her back? I am very curious about that one.
acd303 Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 I'm so sorry of your loss, but, basically she ****ed some other guy three days afrer she broke up with you...? yeah you really should care about her... maybe some self-respect is what you need. Forget about her, how much difficult it could be.
emptyme Posted April 11, 2009 Posted April 11, 2009 You can NOT be her friend. Stay NC if you want her back. Please trust me with this. I have be there. Be nice about but she didnt want to be in a relationship with you, right? Yes she wants to talk about her other situations going on? This only tells me she still feels for you. If you are there for her, she is having her cake and eating it too. If you go NC and i mean REAL DEAL NO CONTACT - she might realize what she is missing much sooner..Good luck to you
Author alxvln4 Posted April 11, 2009 Author Posted April 11, 2009 I am sorry you GF broke up with you. What was her reason? I don't get the quoted part. You heard this from a friend, right? Your GF felt bad - why? Because it was too soon? Does she still love you? Why won't you tell her you want her back? I am very curious about that one. first of all i dont see where i said what you quoted... i never said that i heard that from a friend i heard it from her. I dont want to tell her that i want her back because i think that it would make me seem desperate, which i am but i dont want her to see that i want her to think that i am cool and collected. oh and her reason she broke up with me is because she doesn't love me anymore and thats all she told me.
Author alxvln4 Posted April 11, 2009 Author Posted April 11, 2009 i have some other questions that i would appreciate if they could be answered. First of all how long should i go with out contact with her? And what do i do after not contacting her for that amount of time?
lostsunsets Posted April 11, 2009 Posted April 11, 2009 So now instead of boyfriend you're her father confessor. She kissed and felt bad, She was naked and felt bad. Next she will have sex and though it felt good it felt bad. Next after that it will be they had sex and it felt good and it doesn't feel bad. You are making great progress in easing into this other relationship. Soon she won't need you at all and you will get an invitation to their wedding.
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