Yes or no?

[Khabarak]

Bear with me for a second while I explain my situation:

 

I'm 20 years old and I'm in college. I've been talking to this girl I'm interested in between two of my classes. She is only there on MWF, and only for about 10-15 minutes at max.. sometimes I don't see her at all. I started talking to her last Friday, and things went pretty well. She continued the conversation, so I felt that I hadn't overstepped my welcome. I never did ask her name (or her mine).

 

On Monday, she greeted me with a nice smile and a friendly hello. She sat down beside me, but a lot of the other seats were taken. We talked a little more, but not as much as we did on Friday. This was mostly because she was talking to some other people in her class about their homework for that class. I still didn't ask for her name.

 

Today she again greeted me with a nice smile and a hello. She also sat right next to me again, but this time pretty much every other seat was empty (she could easily have avoided me if she wanted to). We talked some more, and today I did ask her name (and gave her mine).

 

A couple hours ago I looked for her on MySpace. Because I know her name, age, birthday, and where she went to school (and goes to school) finding her wasn't hard. I noticed she hadn't logged on to her account for several months though, and decided this probably wasn't a good way to get in touch with her outside of our brief meetings at school. On her page, she had her middle name.

 

The university I attend has an email system that allows you to search (by name) emails of your fellow students. Using that system, I found a list of all people with her first name -- it was pretty large. I looked at people with her middle initial -- there were only 3. Emails are also linked to some personal info (i.e., phone number, address, class level, etc). Two of these people were not at her class level -- that left only one. So, in a matter of about 10 minutes (total) I figured out her email address.

 

My debate, then, is this:

 

Should I go ahead and email her (of course letting her know that I found her email using the campus email system)? Or should I wait until Monday (no class this Friday) and hope that I have the chance (and the guts) to ask her for some contact information?

 

The way I see it, she'll likely either be flattered that I went to the trouble to look for a way to contact her, or she'll feel like I "stalking" her.

 

The reason I'm considering this at all:

I did this once before and actually ended up dating the girl. In that case, I glanced her full name off of the class roster when I signed for my attendance. She didn't have a problem with that, but I suspect a lot of people would.

 

At this time I'm leaning towards waiting, because I feel like that is probably the safer option, but if enough people encourage me to send an email I probably will.

 

Thanks in advance!

[loser101]

i think you will either freak her out, or will make her think its too impersonal. Wait until you see her again and ask her out for a coffee.

[JohnnyBlaze]

If she's sitting right next to you when she doesn't have to and giving you info like her birthday, it sounds like there's already some interest on her part, so why rock the boat? You're already ahead of the game. You got lucky with the private investigator routine once (no pun intended); it's unlikely that you'll succeed twice. I'd work this one the old-fashioned way for the time being and wait to ask her in person. If you discover that she likes such surprises, you can always switch gears later on. But until you get some kind of idea what she responds positively to, it's probably best to follow SOP for the time being. It's not as dramatic, but you'll have a better chance of success.

[Khabarak]

Alright. Thanks everybody!

 

The responses I'm getting are what I expected -- I'll just wait and talk to her again next time I see her. Hopefully I can manage to get myself to ask her for a phone number/email address.