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Posted

My fiancee and I have been on a break for 3 weeks now. She's been having some personal problems (depression and family issues) and she said she needs some time alone to sort her head out because she's no good for the relationship at the moment.

 

I've been respecting that she needs time alone and have gone NC with her. She was the one who started contacting me again after a week of NC. Things were looking up then and now she's suddenly cut off all contact with me, including deleting me from Facebook.

 

What do you think about this? Is she just cutting me out of her life all of a sudden or is she just doing it because she's hurting as well and just doing NC too? Is she trying to provoke me in a way to break NC?

Posted

I have no idea what to tell you, all you be is respectful towards yourself. If you can handle this, give her your space and just show you will be there for her, It makes sense she would call.

 

If you can't that does not mean your a bad person, either way she will call, the rest of the decision is up to you

 

Don't break no contact, I would just send her a text every few days, showing you care, but not crowding her

Posted

Maybe she took your NC as your way of telling her you don't care and are fine with the situation, so she retaliated by removing you from her Facebook account. She knew that would pick a nerve with you. I agree with Trying123. I think sending a text message every once in a while to let her know you are thinking about her is ok. But I think its unfair for her to close you out of her life as well. She really must be having a hard time and wants you to be the bigger person and where you heart on your sleeve for her, inspite of her saying she wants space. Sometimes people make no sense. You haven't officially broke things off for good, so it would be rational to get closure if you think getting back together isn't going to happen.

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Posted
I have no idea what to tell you, all you be is respectful towards yourself. If you can handle this, give her your space and just show you will be there for her, It makes sense she would call.

 

If you can't that does not mean your a bad person, either way she will call, the rest of the decision is up to you

 

Don't break no contact, I would just send her a text every few days, showing you care, but not crowding her

 

I feel if I send her a little text showing I care she'd even see that as crowding and trying to pressurise her since she's in this state of mind where she just wants to be alone. What do you think?

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Posted
Maybe she took your NC as your way of telling her you don't care and are fine with the situation, so she retaliated by removing you from her Facebook account. She knew that would pick a nerve with you. I agree with Trying123. I think sending a text message every once in a while to let her know you are thinking about her is ok. But I think its unfair for her to close you out of her life as well. She really must be having a hard time and wants you to be the bigger person and where you heart on your sleeve for her, inspite of her saying she wants space. Sometimes people make no sense. You haven't officially broke things off for good, so it would be rational to get closure if you think getting back together isn't going to happen.

 

She always used to say that I'm 'emotionally stronger' than her, so in a way I'm guessing she's hoping I won't see it as she hates me and never wants me to see me again or something and be strong for both of us, but I dunno cos it's been so long with NC. I think maybe she's too scared to contact me now or something and deleted me off her FB cos she knows it'd upset me and hopes I might contact her because of it? I think she isn't giving me any closure cos she doesn't want to break it off for good, she's just still struggling with her personal issues.

Posted

One of you will have to swollow your pride and make a move. It would be a shame that your relationship went stale because both of you had too much pride to call or communicate with the other. If you make a good attempt to communicate and she pushes you away or doesn't respond, then at least you can say you gave it a shot and tried. Then you can truly move forward rather than be in this "I don't know what's going on stage".

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Posted
One of you will have to swollow your pride and make a move. It would be a shame that your relationship went stale because both of you had too much pride to call or communicate with the other. If you make a good attempt to communicate and she pushes you away or doesn't respond, then at least you can say you gave it a shot and tried. Then you can truly move forward rather than be in this "I don't know what's going on stage".

 

I know it sounds stupid, but I think I'm absolutely terrified to contact her in case she does push me away. I know that even if she did, it wouldn't mean that that's how she really feels though. I know she does exactly the opposite of what she wants when she's very upset, but I don't think I could deal with it at the moment. If I stay NC would that be really bad?

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