andy2009 Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 I'm M 28 and had superb relationship with my gf 25 for more than 3 years. Recently she sent email asking for space. She said she wanted to figured out she still loves me or not and also asked me not to contact her first. Then after 10 days, she called me and said she missed me a lot and then I asked whether she loves me? Then she said she missed me, and then I asked again same then she said she loves me. After few sentences I felt she is crying and she cut off phone. After that, being emotionally i sent a text saying that I hate her. I think it was a mistake. Since then I maintain NC (4 days). Do you guys/girls think she got another man in her life. I know she is the one who can tell this answer but what do you guys feel ? but at the same time I missed her more and more as day pass by.
Thomas X Forever Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 I think she may just be going through a tough time. Maybe she truly does want some space to see if she loves you. I don't know if I'd have said "I hate you" though. No reason to burn any bridges. But you can't really stop yourself when you feel raw emotion I suppose.. Most people can't anyway. You should give her space and continue NC. Let her come back.
Author andy2009 Posted April 6, 2009 Author Posted April 6, 2009 Thomas Thank you for input. I think regarding Hate text, I think she must understand me which i did not mean. maintaining NC is really tough job. Most of the forums say "space" as a red flag/indication or "gentle breakup" which makes me disappointed. I feel if she does not come back after 1 month of space period it means she will be gone forever.
Aerorobyn Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 Give her the space. Don't try contacting her. She missed you and still had feelings for you after 10 days apart, so I'm pretty sure that there are still feelings there. Who knows what's going on in her life. Women DO go through issues too though, ya know? Men aren't the only ones who need space to find themselves. You probably shouldn't have told her "I hate you" ...I've wanted to say that to my ex a few times because of how angry/sad I am about the breakup. I could never tell him that though... Love requires being able to forgive and forget though. So if she loves you, if she comes back around, she should be able and willing to forgive you and forget harsh words that were said.
Author andy2009 Posted April 6, 2009 Author Posted April 6, 2009 Aerorobyn Thank you. After hearing from you I have a little hope that she will back. Before I was too disappointed. I really felt bad after I sent that hate text. and I wanna say sorry and at the same time I should maintain NC. :-( I am really waiting for her call. Everywhere I go, I am thinking of her. If she call me Should I accept her call quickly or I should let her several times. Last time during space period I did the same and she tried 3 times and I received.
huck Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 Exactly the same happened to me mate. I got dumped but she was the one that kept on breaking no contact - texting and ringing when she ws drunk. She found out I was seeing another girl for drinks and rang me to say we should give things a try again.... Realise now she was trying to put a spanner in the works with this new girl !!. Seems like some dumpers want the best of both worlds and cant stand the fact that we might actually try and carry on with our lives. In your position I wouldnt let it carry on for too long.. Otherwise you will be forever hoping she might come back.. maintain NC - if she wants to get back with you badly - she will find you.. Good Luck
Author andy2009 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Posted April 7, 2009 Since I have mistaken to send "Hate" text and I should keep NC. I am in dilemma what action should I take. or just keep NC. :-(
EmperorR Posted April 7, 2009 Posted April 7, 2009 If she wants space, give her space disappear from her life
Author andy2009 Posted April 8, 2009 Author Posted April 8, 2009 NC 7 days. She called me last time on 1 st April. Now nothing. then it seems that it was gentle break up. If it is true then I am most unlucky person because I did know the reason, did not meet her since 23 March. dont know if she still has feeling for me. But after 3 years whatever is the reason she must be thinking of me. Is it that easy.... is she heartless.... I am totally devastated ....
Treasa Posted April 8, 2009 Posted April 8, 2009 Regardless or whether you two get back together or not, I think you should send her an email telling her you're sorry for telling her you hate her, and that you don't and that you were just reacting out of hurt feelings. Follow up by writing that you're feeling better now, and respect her desire for space. I think this will make you feel better in the long run. But after you do this, don't contact her again unless she asks you to. Sometimes a request for space is JUST THAT. My boyfriend did it a couple of times, and I gave him his space, he didn't see anyone else, and came back to me almost immediately.
Author andy2009 Posted April 20, 2009 Author Posted April 20, 2009 then I sent email to her. And I checked her mailbox, she deleted my email. still I can not understand what she wants from me....now it is nearly 1 month....
Recommended Posts