shy_guy Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 Hey there! The story so far... So I just started seeing this girl who I met through a friend. We didnt talk much the night we met (big group of friends etc) but I did manage to get her number and ended up calling her the next week to ask her to dinner. She agreed and after some scheduling problems we met and as far as I can tell dinner went well. Conversation was good and she seemed to have a good time and also seemed enthusiastic about meeting up again. Since then we have spoken a couple more times (mostly just to schedule another date) and have one organized for this week (again sounded enthusiastic). What's the problem? Well it seems whenever I talk to her on the phone (and from our first date) that she wants to keep doing stuff together, but by the time of our second date nearly 4 weeks will have passed since the first. Admittedly a week and a half of that was spring break (we're in college). I would have liked to have seen her again sooner but she seems to be busy with a lot of schoolwork and other clubs and am not sure what to make of this- a sign of disinterest? Also sometimes takes a long time to respond to texts. So I guess my questions are: - In your experience what is a normal / average amount of time between dates when just starting to see somebody? - In this time, is it normal to not really talk much between dates? Thanks!
Balthazar Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 4 weeks between dates is way too long. Interested women will make the time to see you, DESPITE a heavy schedule. Have no doubts about that. Do not mistake her "enthusiasm" for erotic interest. There is a small chance that she actually has been very busy, but in that case, you are talking about a woman whose interest in you is ,still,quite minute. In all likelihood, she views you as a "friend", nothing else. I say go on a date with her, but keep seeing/dating other women and try to find one that is less enthusiastic in words but more so in actions! This will make for a much happier shy_guy! Cheers,
prettybaby Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 4 weeks between the first and the second date sounds pretty freaking long. Hmm. I wouldn't get too pessimistic just yet though, but try to move the frequency of dates up a bit. How often do you guys communicate? (by text, email, phone, real life, etc). I think you only start to see a potential relationship when you date someone with a regular frequency, be it once or twice a week, depending on both schedules. So you're definitely not there yet.
SoulSearch_CO Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 It was 7 weeks between my first date and second date with my BF. But we're 107 miles apart and he really didn't try to make any concrete date with me between the first and second date. But I still don't think 4 weeks is that bad. I also did wonder how often you guys communicate via phone, email, etc.
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