Slymee Posted April 5, 2009 Posted April 5, 2009 my girlfriend and i met through a friend on myspace.com and met the next day. we dated for 3-5 weeks before we moved in together. we got engaged after maybe 6 months but was soon broken off due to too much stress. we lived together and worked together for 2 years before i got fired and had to find another job... but we of course still lived together. i finally got another job and was enjoying it to its fullest. we were together for 1 month shy of 3 years! durring the first year, alcohol was a huge factor in her/our lives. she drank a lot and i drank a lot because she drank a lot. we started off by going out 2-4 times a week, drinking, partying, singing karaoke, stuff like. bringing beer home in between "bar days". we were having sex all the time. we were very lovey dovey. everything was fine until she started getting on bars or on stage and showing her boobs to everyone or giving a free peep show right there at our table to complete strangers. i caught her kissing 5 or 6 guys in the bars and saw her kissing i believe 2 or 3 guys at house parties. every time we went home, the next day the excuse was "baby i'm sorry, i was drunk!". we of course would make up and forget about it. the second year of the relationship was a little more mild. we stopped going out so much, but she would bring 18 packs of beer or 2-4 bottles of wine home and we would pollish them that night. we were still drinking as much as the first year. durring this second year, the sex dwindled about 70%. yes seventy percent! only doing it MAYBE once a week. foreplay was gone completely. she also gained about sixty (60) pounds/lbs. and i maintained the same average weight that i had when we met. we were so focused on what we had been doing for the last year that drinking seemed like a normal daily process as working or paying bills. we would fight all the time and constantly be at each others throats, but it was rare that we ever faught in front of our friends and practically never faught in public (bars). that was soon to change. the third year of the relationship we THOUGHT would be better! we know eachother now. we have learned from our mistakes. i have a different job than her so we dont see eachother 24/7. nothing changed, we still argued, if not more. our friends saw us argue when they would come to our house. we were constantly keeping "the little things" from eachother, saving them up in little explosive balls that we would bring out in the middle of some stupid quarrel, turning it into a full blown argument. oddly enough, as much as we were at eachothers throats, we would still go out and make our weekly social quota and meet our friends for karaoke on thursdays. some times twice a week! unfortunately the sex dwindled so much that a 12 pack of condoms would last a full year. only having sex once a month. equally spaced out between her periods to reduce the possibility of pregnancy to its lowest chance percentile. there was never really a "cheating" threat between us. at least i dont think there was. granted she didnt trust me when i went out of state to work for 2 weeks to help catch up on some bills. but if i really wanted to cheat on her, why would i leave town? i would have better chances with the people i have known in my town for the last few years. come on, i'm not THAT smooth. and besides, SHE'S the one who made out with all those guys at the bars and showed some skin to the general public... not me! anyway, on april 1st, 2009, april fools day, which is one month before our anniversary, the one day i had been trying so hard to think up of a good prank.... on ANYONE... she goes and gets in a bar fight with some stupid girl who "bummed" too many cigarettes from me. she claimed that i "TOLD" her to do it, to go fight the girl for taking 1 too many cigarettes. really? i mean number one: do you fight someone for taking 3 cigarettes when you offer them one? it may bug you a bit and the most you can do is ask for them back. and number two: even if someone DID tell you to go kick someone's ass, would you really put your self in that position over something so miniscewel?! COME ON! well she got arested that night, but not for assault. for public intoxication. but while she was being arested she was screaming that it was my fault, i made her do it, trying to bring me down with her..... and that was just the last straw. i was tired of her always using alcohol as an excuse... every day! always brushing our faults under the rug. aside from ALL of the 3 years of bulls**t, it was just finally time to end it. i had been planning on it for a while but didnt expect to do it until our lease was up in july 2009, but it happened 3 months early. while she was in jail (only like 6 hours till she sobered up), i packed up my stuff, went to atlanta, got on a greyhound bus and drove to boston, mass. this whole mess could have been diluted easier if it were for MANY factors but if this didnt happen, i would still be in the same toxic relationship, just dealing with the same garbage and wasting more of my time. i'm not mad at her, i'm not angry with her, i dont hate her! i'm just over it and i needed a change. like obama said, we need change! a change of pace, a change of state, a change of life! A CHANCE TO MAKE A NEW, BETTER LIFE!!! i think i made the right decision... heh, she didnt even really argue the matter. she just said over the phone "well i guess your not coming back so i'm gonna have to sell some stuff in order for me to move out on my own." heh i'm still really depressed and broken up about it... its only been a few days but i'm really trying to get over it and i am staying with family and they're helping me cope. thankyou for reading all of this. it could have been 5 times longer if i added in all the details but its late and i need sleep. please comment back and talk to me about it! you can go to http://www.myspace.com/remington83 or http://www.myspace.com/remingtonaldrete to contact me directly.
Thomas X Forever Posted April 5, 2009 Posted April 5, 2009 First and foremost, you needed out of that relationship. Secondly, those myspace links will get you into trouble with the admins here lol. Not kidding. Thirdly, congratulations on getting out of a toxic relationship. That was a dead end and you'd go nowhere but down.
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