www Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 My wife and I have been married for 8 years. However, we dated for less than a year and then she got pregnant. Well, we had to start living together so I could support her since our parents and all relatives were far away from us. Story short, our marriage since day one was not statisfying as we both did not have any respect for one another...but we worked it out and managed to get two kids and now there are 4 and 6. During the first 5 years, I messed up a lot as I was the only providing and had to work almost every hour I got! So, that made my wife starting getting sspicious that I cheat on her with my coworkers...Well, I was stupid enough by then and allowed some chicks to call my cell phone and share conversations like there was nothing wrong on my wife's part. But, it WAS! We got into fights every day and I ended up in lie detector chair! But I passed all her desired questions! The I thought that that was over! Not yet! A year after that she caught me talking to another coworker ( girl) on the phone again! Busted! From then, I realized that I was being so stupid and found out how much she wanted me to be straight in our marriage. So, I checked my self and for the last 2.5 years, any women other than my wife can not stay in my way no matter how good looking or sweet sh can be! Totally different me. However, regardless the changes, our love plunged to the bottom of the line. She doesn't seems to love me. We just live like roomate! But...but...our sex relationaship stays in a good standing. So, the problem is this: the past has made us enemies! Everytime sh emaotionally think about the past, even whatever happenned while still dating, makes her look at me like she never loved me before. She just go on and get mad...mad...angry and start arguing aboth thing that happened long ago. And that will go on for almost about a week or so until all her emaotions are gone and start living normal life for a while again. So, for the last 6 days, we don't talk! We sleep together and eat together ...but we don't talk to each other unless sh want to argue with me. I need help! I use to be generous and put my excuse my slef for a day or two until she gets over it but now she seems to be lot thougher to even approach and talk about anything! What can I do to earn her back again? Any idea?
carhill Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 How old are you and your wife? Is there some sort of marriage counseling where you live? Given the beginnings of the M, I wouldn't put much confidence in a good outcome, but MC might help you better relate for the sake of your children and perhaps help you better co-parent as/if you transition to single life. Personally, I'd probably call it a day, but optimists abound on LS
Author www Posted April 5, 2009 Author Posted April 5, 2009 How old are you and your wife? Is there some sort of marriage counseling where you live? Given the beginnings of the M, I wouldn't put much confidence in a good outcome, but MC might help you better relate for the sake of your children and perhaps help you better co-parent as/if you transition to single life. Personally, I'd probably call it a day, but optimists abound on LS I'm 32 and she is 30. We talked about MC but never made a final decision about it. Actually, last year sh proposed we do that but I was against it as she most don't keep her words or be persistant on most of decisions we make...I'm a hard working man and I do not like wasting my time...as I had before.
carhill Posted April 5, 2009 Posted April 5, 2009 Sometimes there are things in life which supersede work and I think working to achieve a healthy co-parenting arrangement for the children would be one of them. Generally, men are "fixers" and, if they don't feel they can fix it, they don't bother devoting the time and energy. Sometimes the real solution is in just that, the effort. As someone who went through MC and benefited from it, I now realize that.
Mr. Lucky Posted April 5, 2009 Posted April 5, 2009 Actually, last year sh proposed we do that but I was against it as she most don't keep her words or be persistant on most of decisions we make...I'm a hard working man and I do not like wasting my time...as I had before. The I guess I'd have to ask what your plan is for making things different or better ??? Mr. Lucky
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