jealousy, girlfriend reguarly at pub when im working away

[skotup2]

my girlfriend of 6 years, yeah yeah, bout to get married, i know. im working away and she has been goin to the same pub with her single friend 3-4 times a week to play pool. naturaly she plays pool with guys. Her single friend was interested in a guy they met playing pool and has previously organised to meet them at the pub and to out clubbing afterwards. I dont have a problem at all with my girlfriend going to the pub and playing pool where guys will naturaly play with them, if it was once in a while. what is upsetting me is the regularity of it while im working away. I have images of her flirting and carrying on with guys at the pub, having a great time, y else would she go 4 times a week. I have a problem with her possibly starting a new social network of guy friends. She seems to think my issues are about trust but i do trust her, its that it just doesnt sit well. i know she doenst have any untrust worthy intentions, but i dont like it. I believe what she is doing is wrong towards our relationship but she thinks its ok. what does every1 else think, is this ok or are my feelings of jealously and dislike of the situation justified?

[BILL B]

Hi im 48 and have the same thing in a way , my girl is 50 and she likes to go out with her friends and some are single, she gos to a place thats local... She knows i trust her she trust me. If your girl friends friends want to talk with some one ---i was told this a 2 weeks ago, your girl friend knows to talk and be social but if a guy trys to get somewher with her she knows what to do... Trust her i have the same thing going on so. Just trust her or it will hert her feelings and she will think you have douts.... It will stick with her and come up later.. So i hope that helps...

[BILL B]

Hay,, your overreacting a bit, its ok iv done it my self, as long as you can see it and change it your doing ok,,,and i think your girl friend will appreciate it ... You need to validate her feelings of trust, she needs to be herself also. Thats the girl you love so trust her and remember she needs to be herself and will do the right thing if some one bothers her... For my girl becose of a bad past marriage is out and thats fine with me we can still do the same things..and she feels validated and happy... So try and relaxe some jealousy is human also. But not a lot to hert her... Hope this helps

[slimjim]

if it bothers you, then tell her and see how she reacts. i think your gut is telling you that something is going on here-- otherwise you wouldnt post--TRUST THAT FEELING!! it is usually right the majority of the time.

 

her activity can only breed distrust at the most and resentment at the least. you bust your butt and she is partying every night with the bar guys. those guys have more on their mind than just playing pool, you can believe that. add a few drinks, and anything can happen. seems to me that people who really respect their relationship never put themselves in a position to cause doubt in the other partner, especially when they are aware of the concern of their partner over this activity.

 

if you explain your concern and she agrees or changes, then ok. if she rejects, then its all about her, and dump her. i would think it is disrespectful to your relationship for her to be at these places with out you...dont try to be too PC and let her snow you--you know whats right and whats not. she does also, but probably doesnt care.

 

just my opinion, and take it for what its worth--nothing.