Gstover561 Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 Ok so here is the situation. I met this girl on face book about 2 weeks ago...we've been sending eachother messages since then...planning to hang out this weekend. Ive never met up with anyone Ive met online before so I dont really know what to expect. Ive kind of narrowed down what to do to something light but active like miniature golf, because it will give us something to do rather than sitting at a dinner table interrogating eachother...but im 21 years old and it might be kind of childish? I was also thinking of this coffee shop which is pretty cool...but I kind of want to avoid the whole awkwardness of sitting at a table asking eachother questions because we dont know eachother THAT well...I guess we can always take a walk by the beach (right by the coffee shop). So I come to this forum to ask for opinion on what yout hink/would prefer to do, or if there are any other ideas I am very open to hear them... Also, any tips, advice, anything I should know about meeting someone online? Nothing like "be careful blah blah blah :P"
BobSacamento Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 I always go for coffee. I don't really understand your thinking that because you don't know someone well that you can't sit and talk with them. Isn't that the point of the date? To get to know them. I like the coffee meet up because if they end up being a total weirdo it only last 15 - 20 mins tops and you can bail. If it goes well and you planned close to dinner and ask if they'd like to get something to eat after. Or go for a walk.
EllieBean Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 I agree with Bob - invite her for coffee, and if it goes well extend the date to include a walk or perhaps dinner. The coffee shop is a public place, so if she has any safety concerns about meeting you then hopefully meeting for coffee in such a place will make her feel less worried. When I've got to know people online and then met them IRL, the main worry is if we'll find each other attractive - you already know you enjoy chatting online and get along well, the question is whether this will be a relationship (physical attraction) or a friendship (no attraction). Don't feel pressured to move to quickly from chatting like friends to behaving like a couple (physical stuff etc) unless you both feel completely comfortable.
collegekid491 Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 Honestly... if your meeting there should be some kind of bond there, so over coffee shouldn't be to bad. But as for the 'childish' dates, girls love that stuff man. Its got a innocent, playful atmosphere, also always a fall back for awkward silences.
yongyong Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 use the words 'hang out' for maybe 3 casual dates and then you can ask her out to dinner.
voldigicam Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 I'm no expert in today's world, but I always did well just meeting doing something I liked. Or meet for coffee & if the mix seems good, invite to do something. Shopping at the mall. Walk. 9 holes of golf (have the extra clubs). Go Karts. Anything interesting and fun. Novelty does well. I am probably unconventional, though. Twice in my life I've asked someone I didn't know very well over for dinner and they've stayed - about 15 years each. The second is still here. Well, she's asleep, but she's here! I didn't know her at all - a setup by her brother. If the chemistry is there, doesn't matter where you are. And if it isn't, well doesn't matter either. I suspect relaxing and being yourself is much more important.
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