lostsoulmate Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 When he says things like, I don't want to break up your relationship; I feel terrible about what we have done to your family; etc. Is the guilt the OM feels the same as what I feel as the WS? By the way, the OM is single with two little ones. He and I are exes. It had been six years since we had seen each other. I am in a LTR of 6 years, we have a young daughter. I miss my OM.
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 4, 2009 Posted April 4, 2009 It depends on the guy. Some really mean it, and others just say that to keep you from breaking up so that they don't have to commit to you.
Victoria2 Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 I am not sore for what is all about! I can understand you have lover or what is the problem?
RinClavin Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 It's going to depend on the person. My OM (Emotional Affair) was the first to suggest that our "friendship" was hurting my marriage. He was the one that suggested we redefine our relationship and stop talking on the phone. In our case it was the unmaried person that saw our "friendship" for what it was and suggested change. So of course some OM/W can mean what they say. Others just say what they think you want to hear. And still others mean what they say but aren't strong/determined enough to make any changes.
Owl Posted April 6, 2009 Posted April 6, 2009 It shouldn't matter whether he meant it or not. If you're still married...the OM should no longer be part of the equation, nor should you be focusing your thoughts on his truthfulness (or lack thereof). Instead, you honor your commitment to your marriage, and your family, and stop letting OM continue to hurt that relationship by your pining for him. Yes, you'll miss him, but if you and your H are truly working to rebuild your marriage, that's a transitory state.
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