skinman Posted April 7, 2009 Posted April 7, 2009 I have read Counseling before the breakup would make things worse - because maybe we would in fact "fix" the false problems and thus perpetuate the false marriage. It is much easier to just end the relationship and then use revisionist history to justify the breakup. Wow, I agree with everything N9 has written here same situations I found myself in.. never had a clue there were issues our sex life was the best it had been in years then all of a sudden... out of knowhere I dont love you anymore... Since then I found out there was someone else in the background while i worked and busted my A$$ for the family she was enjoying her free time with her friend.. To this day she still says it was all me and I am the reason she left..... Her family is tired of her lies and BS with regards to me. The know just what kind of man I am and was during our time together.... It was much easier for her to walk then try and work things out.. the small issues that all marriages have but our different schedules led to loss of communication... here I supported her starting her own business only to have it lead to the downfall of my marriage........
skinman Posted April 7, 2009 Posted April 7, 2009 Out of curiosity for people who feel their spouses walked away without communicating issues: Why did you choose a non-communicator? They must have displayed these tendencies during the dating phase, in some way. A symptom of such, is a man or woman who has no opinion or refuses to state their true feelings. Passive-aggressiveness can be their choice of artillery, when arguments break out.Can you state with 100% certainty that your spouses never, ever said a word to you about their issues? TBF... I can honestly say that my wife did state issues we had a few years back and I worked my butt off trying to be supportive and communicative with her.. showing her the affection that she wanted and doing my best to please her... it was then years later when i thought our marriage was stronger than ever when she decided to walk.. or in my case ask me to leave........ I know in my case I never stated my issues I was always doing what was best for the family our to cause the least amount on tension... I can see by doing this she lost respect for me all the while i thought i was pleasing her by not getting into fights over nothing...
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