killbill Posted October 13, 2003 Posted October 13, 2003 How could this have happened? I met this handsome man a few years ago. He was with out a doubt the most handsome, well dressed, well groomed man I have ever laid my eyes on. He could make me blush and stumble for words with just a look. And I am not shy. I met him at a work shop for managing your finances correctly in hopes to gain money. He asked me out afterwards but I declined because I for the first time felt insuperior by a man. Standing next to him I felt like an ackward 12 year old wearing braces and dorky clothes and a bad hair cut. I had never felt so self conscience ever. Later that weekend I went to a party fashion show. A party that is thrown here once every few months. It's a party that if you are someone to be seen or you need to meet some people who is to be seen it's the place to be. Well there he was. Standing across the bar talking with a bunch of men and women who also looked like they were of some importance. All very well dressed and reaking of money. I tried to turn my head to the side and look busy meeting and talking to people also. Well, he must have noticed me because he showed up next to me at the bar. He was so nice and respectable. He spoke very nice and articulate. He was definantly well educated. I had some very nice conversations with him. When the night ended I didn't want to leave him. I was enjoying every second of our conversation. He waited with me for the vallet to bring me my car and then very gentalmanly tipped the vallet for me and then dismissed him so he could open and close my car door. We exchanged cards and went on a date that following week. I was enjoying the life he was showing me. I felt important in his expensive cars and the high society of friends he had. I was becoming infatuated with the life style but falling in love with him. We began to practically live together. He had a job in realstate. He would leave for hours and then return home. Sometimes late in the evening he would have plans to show a house. I continued to work, though only part time. I couldn't give up my career in hopes that this man and I would never fall out of love. We were always out at places to be seen at. He bought me nice things and even a matching car to his suv. I knew he made money from stocks and from reastate. Also his father had passed away and left him quite a bit of money. Which he invested and used very smartly to have what he did. Or at least I thought. We dated for a little over three years. Maybe I was blind to the fact or maybe he hid it very well. But a few months ago I got a call from a friend of mine. She said she has seen my man in some shacky situations. And after doing some investigating of her own she has found out why. She told me as calmly as she could that my man was a drug dealer. One of the largest in our city! OMG! How could I not know I was dateing a drug dealer! My heart was broke! I really loved this man and he came with benefits. I felt so betrayed and so shocked! Anyways I broke it off with him and I have been so lonely since. No one can hold a candle to this man. I have tried reentering the dating scene with no luck. And it has been very hard to see my ex and feel so much for him and want to dismiss the truth and live like one of the sapranos or something. But what he is doing is so immoral. I feel like I have lost something truley great in my life. Strange how someone can tell you thr truth just not fully and you can over look it because you care so much for them. I wasn't aware one of his investments was drugs.
Tony T Posted October 13, 2003 Posted October 13, 2003 You have either omitted a lot of details or you may have made a grave mistake. Just because your girlfriend said this guy was a drug dealer doesn't make him a drug dealer...as much as if she said he was a giraffe that wouldn't make him a giraffe. So her only proof that he is a drug dealer is some of the places she has seen him at. So if she was there to be able to see him, is SHE also a drug dealer? Exactly what kind of investigation did she do? Did she make a buy? Does she know that if she found out beyond a shadow of a doubt that your guy is a drug dealer and failed to notify police, she is guilty of obstruction of justice? Unless you have more to go on than this, I would say he's lucky to be rid of a lady who would color him evil just because somebody said something bad about him. What kind of loyalty is that? I just don't know how you could assume he invested his money in drugs if you have absolutely no idea how he invested his money except what's in your imagination...and places your girlfriend saw him. Well, let me tell you, drug deals are done everywhere and during the Clinton administration people smoked pot in the White House. So does that make his Secretary of State Madeline Albright a drug dealer...because she was in the White House all the time. Or does it make everybody who came into the Oval Office a sex pervert because the President was getting blow jobs from an intern there. Wow, I hope I never have a girl like you! I mean this guy was really, really nice to you and you didn't even give him the benefit of the doubt. Did you confront him and ask him straight out? I would have gone to police and had them conduct an investigation...if he was cleared, you'd be fine. If he wasn't, you would certainly be justified in getting away from him. You may be right. You may never find a man as nice as him and you may never, ever know if you broke his heart justly or unjustly. I think given the kindness he showed you he deserved more than a swift kick in the ass based on the amateur investigation of a busybody girlfriend.
killbill Posted October 13, 2003 Posted October 13, 2003 Of coarse I wouldn't go on someone elses judgement without finding out for myself. She stated her accusitions and I set out to come up with a real conclusion. I began to notice certain friends we would stop by there house parties just long enough to mingle and have a drink and then leave. I also was very aware that most of them were involved with drugs. It never raised a red flag before because although I don't use I have found that a lot of people do. People you would never suspect. Whether they smoke pot or take pills or sniff. I also am an artist and find most of friends in the art feild or very into drugs. I just never imagined they would be getting it from my boyfriend. Well to find out I went to a party that would surely have drugs at it. I told my man that I was going on a girls night out and went to this party. I knew a few of my mans friends or better "clients" would be there. I bodly put money in the pot to go towards buying extacy. I slinked into the backyard to smoke and so I would be out of sight out of mind... About an hour later I heard a voice that unmistakingly was my man. And he and one of the guys also joined a few of us on the patio to have a smoke and make an exchange. As the exchange was taking place I walked up to them and looked directly at their hands so it would be obvious I knew what was going on. My man cooly tried to act natural and suprised to see me. I just shook my head in shame and for the first time felt superior to him and left the party. I had caught him red handed. How much more clear does this picture need to be? Did I call the police no. So I guess I am in obstruction. But I care for him and I hope he soon gets his life together.
Tony T Posted October 13, 2003 Posted October 13, 2003 Your second post makes things a hell of a lot more clear. I'm sorry you're having trouble getting over this guy but had you remained with him you would have been subject to arrest at any time you were in his presence. I'm very sorry it took you so long to find this out. Drug dealers are slimey worms. As long as he's making the big bucks and staying out of jail, what motivation does he have for getting his life together. Obviously, money and drugs took precedence over you.
cindy0039 Posted October 13, 2003 Posted October 13, 2003 I don't think I'd be able to live with myself knowing that this guy is out selling drugs to people and you're not doing anything about it. Seems you could figure out some way to have him and his cohorts busted without anyone finding out it was you. Drugs kill and the people who sell them belong in jail.
innocent Posted October 14, 2003 Posted October 14, 2003 I think that drug dealers are bad, most of them are, but just think for one second about this..... You are 13, live in a ghetto...in a house with your mother and younger brother, your mother is bi-polar, and doesn't know it, and neither do her doctors they keep on giving her pills that they know she is addicted to, and she is always ****ed up, she got fired from her job...she doesn't care, just as long as she can get her pills and cigarettes.... your father is dead...so he's not much help.... you are taking care of your younger brother trying to keep him from having all of this affecting him and you.... Your mother doesn't care to pay the bills you try to get her help, she doesn't go, try again...same thing.. you will be evicted if you don't pay the bill homeless... what are you going to do? you can't get a job, you are 13, you have to go to school and take care of your little brother, adn your mother who resembles that of a baby, crawling around, falling down, drooling all over herself, can't even talk...take her to the hospital, won't admit her b/c she has no insurance....and the problems go on and on....you can only do one thing to make fast money to take care of your family...dealing.... I do have a problem with people who do do it and they have no reason, they can get a job, they can make something of themselves, but they are just to lazy to put in the time and effort But please don't write off these people that you don't know their lives, I bet most of you have never had to worry about such things, I know that I haven' and I am very blessed for that, but put youselves in other peoples shoes... I know that dealing causes violence... but for some of these people it was already there in their frontyard, and yes it's illegal, but the goverment doesn't know everything, most of our politicans, have never experienced or even understand these circumstances... they should help..but they don't... but anyway I don't mean to offend anyone and I'm sorry that I am kinda of off topic, but there are people in trouble and pain behind most of these lifestyles.
cindy0039 Posted October 14, 2003 Posted October 14, 2003 In the scenario you described there IS help for those people. There are hospitals and clinics for people who do not have insurance, with doctors able to diagnose conditions such as bipolar and treat them appropriately. There is also a welfare system for kids who don't have parents to support them. I realize our system isn't perfect, but it's better and safer than selling drugs.
killbill Posted October 14, 2003 Posted October 14, 2003 Sorry you don't like my name Bill. That's funny! I ran into him at my friends house last night...I stop by every monday to see my godchildren. And He was there. I really was upset to see she let him in. I mean she has little kids. But she doesn't feel threatened because he is a nice guy and would never put her children in danger. He begged me to just hear him out. I really didn't want to. But I feel so much for him. But part of me is so upset because it doesn't know if what I feel for him is honest or built from his lies. It's hard to not jump to conclusions and tell him that everything he ever told me I doubt. But I gave him 5 minutes to say what he needed to say. And he did describe such a situation that caused him to sell that was very heart wrenching. And he promised he never just sold to anyone. He started to tell me how he would ride his bike everyday far from his home and he would only sell to adults, never kids, and always to people with money, never a bum. He explained that the area of town he is from is full of scum who sell it to their own neighbors children and to people who are commiting crimes themselves to get the money. He said he feels that his own neighborhood is keeping eachother down. And he didn't want to hurt his community but rather help it. He told me how he has put a park in his old neighborhood with his money. But he first had the children do fundraisers which his clients who are wealthy business men donated money so it wouldn't look suspisious. I don't really understand all the stuff he told me about renovating empty houses into neighborhood stores and such to help cut back on the crack houses. Just sounded like a bunch of money laundering and stuff. Anyways I told him I still felt ill that he sold drugs. Even if his clients are rich men and women who are going to get it from some where if not from him. I told him that he has enough money to stop. He can get a real job now. That he doesn't have to sell to stay alive anymore. He is selling now out of greed. How can a man have made enough money from selling drugs to do so much for his community and put him and his sister through college and be so intelligent but still feel as if it is all he can do? He would make an awsome business man! Anyone who can accomplish as much as he has from the measly wage he got for a paper route when he was young is obviously using great skill in a evil way. Anyways I listened and then I spoke. And I cannot have a relationship with a drugdealer. I don't know how I can ok having friends that get high but can't have a friend that supplies but I just can't. The lifestyle wasn't that impressive to through away my morrals. Although my feelings for him almost were. This world is a crazy screwed up place. He should have never been born into a world where selling drugs or hustling or prostitution or stealing or any other illegal act is the easiest and quickest way out. It isn't fair to him or me or any of the families that these acts effect.
EnigmaXOXO Posted October 14, 2003 Posted October 14, 2003 Good Call! It's amazing to see at what lengths some people will go to delude themselves and others that they are a "good person" although their actions prove otherwise. And just so you don't feel alone, I should tell you that when I was eighteen I was infatuated by an older man who was much like the guy you described. I had no reason to disbelieve him when he told me he had spent four years at Penn State. I thought he meant "college." It wasn't until moving in with him that one of his male buddies informed me that Eddie had not gone to college at all. Rather he had spent four years in the State Penn for armed robbery! I may have been gullible enough then to have been deceived by a skilled lier, but I was still smart enough to RUN! As a matter of fact, a hauled ayas out of there so fast that I left half my stuff behind! Yep...I'm sure we all have those dating stories from hell. We should start a new thread so we could share a few laughs!
innocent Posted October 14, 2003 Posted October 14, 2003 Originally posted by cindy0039 In the scenario you described there IS help for those people. There are hospitals and clinics for people who do not have insurance, with doctors able to diagnose conditions such as bipolar and treat them appropriately. There is also a welfare system for kids who don't have parents to support them. I realize our system isn't perfect, but it's better and safer than selling drugs. You apparently live in a better world. His mother couldn't go anywhere...she was too messed up all of the time, And believe me, he tried to get money from the government, but they always sent him away when he went to ask for help, they just thought he was 13 year old just causing trouble.... and where are these hospitals and clinics? how come the people who need them do not know about them? what are you going to do sent her to rehab? how is a 13 year old going to get that kind of help for your mother?....she has to want to go if she is going to get better..... When you are in these situations, your the only thing that you worry about is survival...food, shelter, not if you are breaking the law, and most of you have no idea what it is like, you think that you do, because that was the way I was until I was on the other side, you have to experience it to know, and I don't mean movies or the news, we are not supeior to these people....they know a million lifetimes more than middle class people do, they have had to learn and grow up fast, they know how to get help, but it is hard to recieve that help.... You just say well there are places that can help them....that's true, but they don't help everyone who needs it you also have to wait months to see if you qualify for government money and etc.....That really isn't a priority when you need food, and shelter...... You all may never understand you have to experience it for yourself things are not as simple as people make them out to be..... and that may never change because people who are in charge don't understand or know how bad things are for some of these people...
EnigmaXOXO Posted October 14, 2003 Posted October 14, 2003 Innocent, A agree with every sentence in your last post. People who need help sometimes have a difficult time getting it because we simply don't have the resources to handle the escalating need. We are building more and more treatment centers, juvenile facilities, and homeless shelters, but we are beyond keeping up. But I would also like to point out that there are many people who come from such tragic backgrounds who somehow find the strength to rise up and move beyond it without intervention. So what is their secret? While it is important to understand why some people might be inclined to mirror such behaviors, we should also be cautious about allowing one to use it as an excuse and therefore become enablers ourselves. If we commit crimes against another individual for the sake of our own well-being, then we are doing so at the expense of another. No matter your history, no one has the right to consider someone else's life, belongings, or health expendable in the desperate...and sometimes selfish attempt to better your own.
Geoff Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 This woman's life would probably be over if she reported him to the police, especially since he is involved with so may prominent people. Staying away from him demonstrates self-respect. This man has clearly gotten himself out of the ghetto, and if he had any conscience whatsoever, he'd retire from his criminal carreer, and use his money as a means of prevention, so that the people from his former neighbourhood would have access to resources, that would assist them in getting ahead inlife without resorting to crime. Sure he'd be using "dirty money", but it would be put to good use. Regarding welfare, people on this system receive barely enough to survive, unless they are in housing (which is typically in questionable neighbourhoods), therefore the poor become criminalized/ghetto-ized. Sure there are food banks ect, but due to cuts in funding, people do not have access to food everytime they need it, ( where I live, people can access the food bank 3 times per year). In additon, where I live, people on welfare have there cheques garnished for every penny they earn, should they decide to take on a part-time job, to stay ahead, remain maketable. Single mother's go through hell trying to access subsidized day-care. I realize this is a generalized statement, however it is important to remember that we live in a world with many gray areas/complex problems. Yes, if you work hard, and make the best of your resources, then it can lead to a better life, but like one of the posters mentioned, when you're trying to survive, you do what you need to, to get by in the moment. It doesn't make it right, but this world is not perfect. just my 2 cents, Geoff
befuddled1 Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 Yes, it's very easy for people who have a good stable life to sit there and say "oh, they can get help if they seek it, there is welfare" etc. Those of us who didn't grow up in ghettos, to crack-addicted mothers and fathers, who didn't grow up on the streets, we have no clue whatsoever, as to what life is like. Let's be real.....those who don't have insurance (health) aren't going to get the same kind of attention and care as those who do. Does the crack addict in the ER get the time of day? Do you honestly think someone is going to sit down with them and do a psychological/psychiatric assessment and take the time to care enough about their mental health? I doubt it. People from low income groups who have mental illness, they fall through the cracks each and every day. No offense, Cindy, but your take on things here is not very realistic, it's very idyllic. And the welfare system for kids whose parents don't/can't support them? How is that? It has to be the parent that applies for welfare, not the kid. I don't condone selling drugs, but it's awfully easy to sit from the comfort of our nice homes and point fingers and have very unrealistic "solutions" for those who live below the poverty line.
moimeme Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 You all may never understand you have to experience it for yourself things are not as simple as people make them out to be..... and that may never change because people who are in charge don't understand or know how bad things are for some of these people... You are SO right - in the matter of this issue, but it also applies to life in general. People who haven't witnessed others' difficulties can glibly say that nobody should have problems because 'the system' is built to take care of them. They haven't tried to get 'the system' to work for them. It is not even close to simple and, as in the stories related above, the folks running and working in 'the system' look for any excuse, no matter how flimsy, to not help because they are still trying to keep their costs down. It's not as if there are pots of money and tons of help available for the asking. The hoops people have to jump through to get them are horrendous. As for the old (I'm so SICK of) story 'some people can rise above this so why not everyone?) BS. Everyone is NOT built the same. People have different strengths, intelligence, needs issues, etc. If you really want to understand, read Adaptation to Life by George Vaillant. He summarizes the results of a very important longitudinal study on a bunch of Harvard grads. He's got an answer to why people succeed in life or not - no matter what their early circumstances. You might just as well say that some people brought up with all the privileges fail so why doesn't every privileged kid fail. It's the same logic.
cindy0039 Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 Originally posted by befuddled1 Yes, it's very easy for people who have a good stable life to sit there and say "oh, they can get help if they seek it, there is welfare" etc. Those of us who didn't grow up in ghettos, to crack-addicted mothers and fathers, who didn't grow up on the streets, we have no clue whatsoever, as to what life is like. I DO have a "clue" as to what real life is like. I grew up with an alcoholic father. My parents divorced when I was nine, my mom is bipolar. The four children were eventually split up and sent to live with various relatives, none of whom lived in nice houses or had money. I lived with my grandparents, who were on welfare. I lost touch with my parents and siblings for several years at a time. I had none of the niceties that most of the kids I went to school with had. If I got sick, I didn't go to the doctor; I eventually got over it. Luckily, I never got seriously ill. Let's be real.....those who don't have insurance (health) aren't going to get the same kind of attention and care as those who do. Does the crack addict in the ER get the time of day? Do you honestly think someone is going to sit down with them and do a psychological/psychiatric assessment and take the time to care enough about their mental health? I doubt it. People from low income groups who have mental illness, they fall through the cracks each and every day. I realize that and I agree. No offense, Cindy, but your take on things here is not very realistic, it's very idyllic. No, I think it's somewhere in between the two extremes. I've had "some" experience and I've seen others who have. I don't live in a fairyland. Unfortunately, the ones who do the best are those who have caring and supportive families, and we don't all have that. And the welfare system for kids whose parents don't/can't support them? How is that? It has to be the parent that applies for welfare, not the kid. I realize that as well. I wasn't born yesterday. I don't condone selling drugs, but it's awfully easy to sit from the comfort of our nice homes and point fingers and have very unrealistic "solutions" for those who live below the poverty line. That was basically my point - that there have got to be other choices besides selling drugs. And I don't think my options are unrealistic. And guess what, you're right, I DO have a nice home NOW. But I haven't always. I certainly had the option of going down the wrong path when I was a teenager, living with my grandparents in a run-down house, on welfare, always wanting what I couldn't have, seeing what others had and I didn't, wishing I could help my grandparents and cousins have a better life. I'm sure -- no, I KNOW -- that lots of people had it rougher than me growing up, but I also know that lots of people had it much better than me growing up. See, I was also sexually abused several times by relatives when I was a child. But I coudn't talk to anyone about it and I couldn't run. I had nowhere to turn, so I had to just take it and try to deal with it and wait for my opportunity to get out of the life I was in and hopefully make a better one for myself. I could have chosen several different paths, but I chose to study hard and make the best grades I possibly could, go to church with my grandmother every Sunday (she was the only one who went in my family), try to avoid things that I knew were wrong, and as soon as I was old enough to understand and had control over the situation, to avoid being alone with any man who could potentially abuse me. I'm going to stop here because I feel I'm getting way off topic now. There's obviously more to my story, but really the point I wanted to make is that I haven't lived my life in a shell, protected from all that is bad and "real." I do realize that life is very difficult for some people and that they sometimes feel they have no options or no way out. And I'm not trying to be judgmental or point fingers. But I do know that life is full of choices and we are the only ones who can make the right ones for ourselves. Nobody is going to take care of us but us. There is help out there, but we have to seek it out. It may not solve all our problems but we have to start somewhere and do the best we can with what we have. I still think it's a cop-out to say that selling drugs is the only way to get out of a bad situation.
moimeme Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 But, Cindy, if you weren't a resilient person, if you hadn't the strength of character, the intelligence, and the drive to do the work you needed to do do you honestly think you could have succeeded. Not everybody is born like you. Our biggest fallacy is to assume that everyone is 'exactly like me. ' Read up on 'resiliency'. It's interesting stuff. I know people who crumple at the thought of an exam and others who have soldiered through horrible things. We are not all constituted the same. It is not our fault. It is how we are made, and it, IMHO, is not fair to blame others who are not as bright or strong or gifted as us for not being like us. I'm not talking to you specifically but to everybody. I am supposedly pretty smart. Other people don't have the same IQ. It isn't their fault that they can't figure some stuff out that comes easy to me. Ought I say to them 'I can do it so why can't you'? Of course it would be horribly unfair of me. I can't run a mile; I had no hope of being a gymnast, either. Is it my fault I wasn't born with those talents? Strength, perseverance, determination are also characteristics that not everyone is born with. We are not all alike. So 'I can do it, why can't you' is an unfair question.
cindy0039 Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 Moimeme - I totally agree with your last post. And no, I wasn't trying to say that everyone should be like me. I was merely pointing out to someone who thought I had no idea what "real life" was like that I do indeed have some experience in real life. I understand that not everyone is born alike. I understand that everybody has a different chemical and mental and physical makeup that makes them unique and able to handle things differently. I understand that not everybody is able to pull themselves up by the bootstraps and just overcome whatever is handed to them in life, and I don't expect that. I have a lot of sympathy for those in situations like have been described in the previous posts on this thread, and I'm sorry if I came off sounding like I don't.
moimeme Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 Is cool, Cindelicious! It was one o' my 'general statements triggered by someone's post' things. I have heard kazillions of people (dontcha love hyperbole?) say 'If I can X, why can't everyone'? Drives me up a WALL.
Clancy Posted October 18, 2003 Posted October 18, 2003 This thread has struck nerve with me. And this will be something of a rant. Moimeme, I agree that not everyone is equally resilient. And I know you are sick of hearing this argument but if you're reading here you will hear it from me. I grew up in poverty, amidst drugs and alcohol. I was physically abused. My sisters grew up in poverty. They were physically and sexually abused. We lived in the worst projects and tenemant houses. None of us resorted to welfare. Yet, we all are university graduates wirth good jobs. The four of us. How is it we all could do it? I'll tell you: Self-respect, discipline and pride and a refusal to allow ourselves to sink back into the world of welfare and handouts. I detest the bleeding heart approach to poverty, alcoholism, and drug abuse. I have known hundreds of families on welfare. Alcohol and laziness are linked to all of them. I never met one family on welfare where there was a good reason for the parent not to be working. I know welfare recipiants who take holidays in Cuba. I know welfare recipiants who live well above the poverty level. I know welfare recipinats who use multiple addresses to get multiple cheques. I never once lacked for a job and neither has anyone I grew up with. The available jobs were not great and they often paid only a little more than welfare. But the fact was and is that anyone who wants to work can work. My welfare bum brother-in-law had a quit more jobs (to go on unemployment insurance and welfare) in one year than most people have in 50 years. When was the last time you heard of a person working his way through night school. We used to hear of it all the time when I was kid. Now we see able-bodied 20 year olds marching in the street demanding increased welfare rates. I say get a freakin McJob. Don' t like serving fries? Go to night school and join higher management. For single mothers who cry for more welfare I say join together live two or three families in one apartment. One mother stay home and look after the kids while the other two get out and get jobs to support one another. A televison show once described an immigrant woman complaining how her welfare cheques don't give her enough to pay for her long distances phone bills back to her homeland. I couldn't believe it. Whatever happenned to stamps and envelopes. What has happenned in this liberal world of ours is that self respect is not necessary in life anymore. There is no stigma attached to food banks, welfare and begging so people demand to be spoon fed by society as a right. I begged at churches as a child. That was shame inducing back then and rightly so. If you are in desperate need of charity then you should get it. But we no longer think of welfare as charity, it's a lifestyle. Welfare recipients expect to live like those who work for a living. If you think I'm wrong or exaggerating, then carry out your own social experiment. Go live with the poor. Go to food banks. Talk with street beggars. You will learn of the fraud. Don't take my word for it, go find out. I'm willing to bet that like the journalist (Montreal Gazette) who asked a welfare street beggar why he didn't just get a job the beggar laughed and replied, "Get a job? I make more than you do." You will also find men with cell phones and pagers at the food banks. By the way the latest census in America shows that a surprising number of the so-callled poor own their own houses. Many have two cars. I have misplaced the link to that news but there is more of that kind of educative information in that census report. What is considered poor in North America would provide families in other countries with a luxury lifestyle. So this has been a rant hasn't it.
innocent Posted October 20, 2003 Posted October 20, 2003 Originally posted by befuddled1 Yes, it's very easy for people who have a good stable life to sit there and say "oh, they can get help if they seek it, there is welfare" etc. it's awfully easy to sit from the comfort of our nice homes and point fingers and have very unrealistic "solutions" for those who live below the poverty line. I could go on and on but this says it all.
innocent Posted October 20, 2003 Posted October 20, 2003 Clancy I see your point and most of that is very true and all maybe true for where you live. I live in Kentucky, and have here for most of my life, and there are alot of people here who really need help, as there are everywhere. I too, have experienced poverty and I think that it is a very important issue. I believe that alot of problems would be fixed if the government focused more on poverty, as well as others too. there is a great deal of people here who cannot read, and that make it very hard for those people to find jobs. Yeah most of you will say why don't they find help? WEll it is really hard to find help when you can't read the phone book or have to ask people to read it for you. Most of them are either too embarrassed or proud to do so. It seems dumb, for that to be an excuse, but it is the truth.
Guest Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 How could this have happened? I met this handsome man a few years ago. He was with out a doubt the most handsome, well dressed, well groomed man I have ever laid my eyes on. He could make me blush and stumble for words with just a look. And I am not shy. I met him at a work shop for managing your finances correctly in hopes to gain money. He asked me out afterwards but I declined because I for the first time felt insuperior by a man. Standing next to him I felt like an ackward 12 year old wearing braces and dorky clothes and a bad hair cut. I had never felt so self conscience ever. Later that weekend I went to a party fashion show. A party that is thrown here once every few months. It's a party that if you are someone to be seen or you need to meet some people who is to be seen it's the place to be. Well there he was. Standing across the bar talking with a bunch of men and women who also looked like they were of some importance. All very well dressed and reaking of money. I tried to turn my head to the side and look busy meeting and talking to people also. Well, he must have noticed me because he showed up next to me at the bar. He was so nice and respectable. He spoke very nice and articulate. He was definantly well educated. I had some very nice conversations with him. When the night ended I didn't want to leave him. I was enjoying every second of our conversation. He waited with me for the vallet to bring me my car and then very gentalmanly tipped the vallet for me and then dismissed him so he could open and close my car door. We exchanged cards and went on a date that following week. I was enjoying the life he was showing me. I felt important in his expensive cars and the high society of friends he had. I was becoming infatuated with the life style but falling in love with him. We began to practically live together. He had a job in realstate. He would leave for hours and then return home. Sometimes late in the evening he would have plans to show a house. I continued to work, though only part time. I couldn't give up my career in hopes that this man and I would never fall out of love. We were always out at places to be seen at. He bought me nice things and even a matching car to his suv. I knew he made money from stocks and from reastate. Also his father had passed away and left him quite a bit of money. Which he invested and used very smartly to have what he did. Or at least I thought. We dated for a little over three years. Maybe I was blind to the fact or maybe he hid it very well. But a few months ago I got a call from a friend of mine. She said she has seen my man in some shacky situations. And after doing some investigating of her own she has found out why. She told me as calmly as she could that my man was a drug dealer. One of the largest in our city! OMG! How could I not know I was dateing a drug dealer! My heart was broke! I really loved this man and he came with benefits. I felt so betrayed and so shocked! Anyways I broke it off with him and I have been so lonely since. No one can hold a candle to this man. I have tried reentering the dating scene with no luck. And it has been very hard to see my ex and feel so much for him and want to dismiss the truth and live like one of the sapranos or something. But what he is doing is so immoral. I feel like I have lost something truley great in my life. Strange how someone can tell you thr truth just not fully and you can over look it because you care so much for them. I wasn't aware one of his investments was drugs. I just got out of a relationship too this man was also a dealer, and i still stayed with him, then he dumped me on xmas, and then told me he was in prison for 4 years and just got out and ant ready for a relationship, but that wasnt it he wanted to be with other women, who were in that lifestyle, like strippers, and whores, thankgod i got out. i am lonley also but i am looking forward on meeting men that are normal again./
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