Keslove Posted April 2, 2009 Posted April 2, 2009 My GF and I are quite different with our personalities/attitudes and in our humor (we're very much the opposites attract). To the point sometimes we just don't understand each other, we take offense, eventually leading to fights. We do have a lot great things going for us, though. e. g. Similar interests, strengths the other lacks. This is my first real relationship and unfortunately something I'm starting to ponder more and more late in the game - after 3 years and looming marriage thoughts. I'm really beginning to wonder now if I need someone who has a similar personaility to myself and gets my jokes. Sometimes I feel like I truly can't be myself around her - I dread she is going to take something personally or blow up on me. I would appreciate any opinions, advice, thoughts on the situation or in general about dating/marrying people with similar or different personality/attitude/traits. Thanks!
Trialbyfire Posted April 2, 2009 Posted April 2, 2009 The more similarities, the better, easier and more viable a relationship. This doesn't mean you have to be identical people, although your core values should be nearly identical. Sense of humour and personality type are key. If you don't find each other funny and entertaining, you're going to either be bored to tears or fighting over differences.
prettybaby Posted April 2, 2009 Posted April 2, 2009 I don't mean to be a pessimist, but those are pretty essential points that unfortunately cannot be changed, as they're part of how somebody's wired so to speak. I predict a break up down the road. It's really not the type of issue you can solve with some deep conversations and there certainly isn't a miracle solution to this type of problem. If you can't be yourself around each other, and find yourself weighing your words and auto-censoring, then yeah, it's time to face the fact that you're not that compatible.
Consquential_Angel Posted April 2, 2009 Posted April 2, 2009 Hi, From what you have said I think it might be time to sit down and think about whether its worth carrying on with this relationship. Me and My Ex always had the same sense of humour and similar personalities...which is why it was so hard to end the relationship once it was obvious it was over. We were like friends but the love had gone. With a partner you should always be able to be yourself. Everyone is different and being in a relationship is all about accepting the others faults and flaws but not losing who you are in the process and trying to be someone you're not to keep the peace. Hope you work something out .
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