Author entityzero Posted April 4, 2009 Author Share Posted April 4, 2009 Thanks Ruby Slippers i definetley see what you're saying, its whats inside that counts at the end of the day. Plus yeah the whole self value thing, i really need to start remembering that I was the good boyfriend to her because of who i am.. not who she is! Kizik man im sorry to p**s you off man, i know i sound like an ungrateful b**ch but i really am VERY grateful for my new girl and to have someone in my life again, I do everything i can to show her how much i appreciate her being there for me.. This isnt so much a problem that affects US as a couple, just me on my own at night mostly. My problem was i literally invested my WHOLE SELF 110% into my ex that its taking longer than I anticipated to pull myself out of it. My new girl knows im still a bit shellshocked but she wants to stick around and make the most of it with me, i know im a very lucky boy. I promise for you guys, myself and HER that I will do whatever it takes to forget about my ex and the shallow thoughts that follow.. Just gotta keep at it! I'll keep y'all posted! Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 So sincere. Indeed it is! Namaste. Peace to you, and to all reading. Link to post Share on other sites
Peter_pan Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 your doing what my ex did, going out with the new person and not allowing yourself time on your own, so when your fully over it you can start to look for the new person. it dosnt sound to fair on the new girl, kind of a bit using actually. but if you like each other then great. at least she knows the situation Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 Maybe you need to come clean with your current girlfriend and tell her that it would be best to take some time apart UNTIL you're over the ex COMPLETELY. I know in my heart her hotness doesnt define me, but i was always so proud to have her on my arm and now shes with him... If I were your girlfriend and I found out you felt this way (the part I bolded) I would break up with you INSTANTLY. Right now your girlfriend is second fiddle and she doesn't even know it. Honestly, I don't think you realize how much you still are into your ex...It truly is UNFAIR to start a new relationship with someone else right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 Right now your girlfriend is second fiddle Yeah.. and she always will be and will never be better than his ex.. that is why he should end it with her.. Link to post Share on other sites
kizik Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 Everybody already told him this but he wants to have his cake and f*ck it, too. Link to post Share on other sites
EmperorR Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 Funny thing is I sort of did this, after my fiance left me with a new girl I was with, always comparing, how her body didn't stack up, how she was a little chubby etc. etc. She dumped me just when I was finally getting over those feelings and really into her, guess I deserved it though. Link to post Share on other sites
UCLAMike Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 excuse me while i go vomit. But all the women there are so thin and tiny! Don't you like their "amazing little bodies?" if you want to know how to let go, try learning that women are more than a pair of tits. i feel so sorry for your new girlfriend and hope she manages to find someone who will love her for who she is instead of sitting around posting about how her body is inferior to his ex's. strong fail Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 strong fail Is this to say that, in your mind, women ARE simply a pair of tits? Interesting. I'll be over here with my breasts making art, writing a book, doing volunteer work, and working every day to make the world suck a little less! Link to post Share on other sites
flash582 Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 No .. they have several other interesting bits as well. Seg ... you might as well get used to the fact that most people in the world aren't going to meet up to your standards ... and most are going to seem rather shallow. I know .... After my last breakup I got real tired of being treated as a dollar sign with a dick. Funny how some women only give a crap about you after you pass a certain income level. Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 I know .... After my last breakup I got real tired of being treated as a dollar sign with a dick. It stuns me that there are women who care about that. On behalf of the Sex and the City-watching, pointy-toed high-heeled shoe-wearing contingent of my gender, I profusely apologize. Link to post Share on other sites
Author entityzero Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 It all comes down to this: 1. Im slightly over weight anyway 2. Never dated in high school 3. Never thought i'd ever date a hot girl Now i've had that, i cant get my mind off it.. I finally got what I fantasized about through my teenage years, and now its gone. I hate battling with my own shallowness, im a better person that my own feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean-Blue Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 It all comes down to this: 1. Im slightly over weight anyway 2. Never dated in high school 3. Never thought i'd ever date a hot girl Now i've had that, i cant get my mind off it.. I finally got what I fantasized about through my teenage years, and now its gone. I hate battling with my own shallowness, im a better person that my own feelings. You sure you're not missing something in your current relationship? Could it be that you're pining away for your ex because you're not satisfied with your current SO? Link to post Share on other sites
Author entityzero Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 People will HATE me for saying this, but the only way my new girl is inferior in ANY WAY is that she is slightly overweight.. and normally that wouldnt bother me, it never has before, its just after dating someone who i was SO physically attracted too, never mind she was emotionally retarded, yes.. im still pining for her small curvy frame. I feel like a f**king shallow a**hole. My new girl blitzes my old in almost every other way, yet my mind is still hungup on such a trivial issue. I hate myself for feeling this way. Link to post Share on other sites
flash582 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 I recommend two strategies. One .... the Zen thing. Think of a bad Memory in your life. Whenever you catch yourself thinking of your ex ... switch to this other thought. The same thought every time. It will not take long before you stop thinking about your ex because it will always bring up this other painful memory that you don't want to think about. Trust me ... it works if you are disiplined about it. Two ..... suggest that the two of you adopt a healthier lifestyle. DON"T, whatever you do, EVER tell your girl she needs to lose weight. Don't Do It. Instead, tell her you've been feeling like crap inside and want to eat better and walk, or jog on the beach, or hike on the weekends, or some other FUN activity that you can do TOGETHER. Tell her that you want to do it as a couple because, 1. it will draw you closer together and 2. you'll never stay modivated unless she's around to kick your butt when you need it. The Exercise will serve as a positive activity in your life that will also mask these feelings you are having. It will have the added benefit of the two of you becoming sexier for each other, and strengthening the bond between you. The solution is not just going to come to you ... you have to go to the solution, my friend. But there are ways to exorcise this ghost that haunts you. Oh ... and DON'T suggest joining a health club .... she'll just see that as you think she's fat. It's the FUN activity(s) that are the key. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 It all comes down to this: 1. Im slightly over weight anyway 2. Never dated in high school 3. Never thought i'd ever date a hot girl Now i've had that, i cant get my mind off it.. I finally got what I fantasized about through my teenage years, and now its gone. I hate battling with my own shallowness, im a better person that my own feelings. Like I said before, this ALL comes down to your own insecurities and perception of your value and worth. What you are battling with here is your ego, which is completely normal in the process of maturing and growing up. Your ex propped up your self-esteem. But true security in the self comes from within. Improve your own self-image and you will find that your preoccupation with the ex's body will naturally fade out, and your appreciation for your current partner will increase. Link to post Share on other sites
kizik Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 true security in the self comes from within. You been stealin' my signature line, Ruby? Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted April 8, 2009 Share Posted April 8, 2009 Ha. Jinx! Link to post Share on other sites
Peter_pan Posted April 8, 2009 Share Posted April 8, 2009 no offence as i know where your comming from mate, but... if your slightly over weight and so is your current partner... you cant expect be out with a model can you.! get down the gym with her or something. and forget your ex. if yo dont then this girl is simply a rebound. end of Link to post Share on other sites
Author entityzero Posted April 8, 2009 Author Share Posted April 8, 2009 Thanks guys im really gonna try and work my ass off on focusing my energy on my new girlfriend and think of my ex as the lying, impulsive, uncaring b**ch that she is. And she maybe stunning on the outside but a nightmare on the inside. And I dont need that. Do I? Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted April 8, 2009 Share Posted April 8, 2009 And I dont need that. Do I? I don't know. How many times do you need to get kicked in the balls before you move on? Link to post Share on other sites
Author entityzero Posted April 8, 2009 Author Share Posted April 8, 2009 True! I just didnt wanna learn these lessons with this girl. It's just really hard to believe she doesnt give a s**t anymore. I really believe as soon as she wakes up she'll dump her new boyfriend and realize she made a massive mistake letting me go. Link to post Share on other sites
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