jmhurts Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Its like reading my own story. Me and my wife have been married 14 yr had 2 houses lots of stuff 2 kids plus my step. Anyway long story short dont own anything anymore moved 3500 miles to be closer to her family, only good option at the time had no money her family could help. out here 1.5 years she loses wait gets a job drivin truck threw a cleaning job she had. Her boss is over all the time every body thinks there doing it I ask she says no thier just friends. Now theres lot that I cant put down into words but alot of it is my fault. Ive been insecure about other things before. We had a friend from back east that moved in with us with her kid and I was insecure about them always disparing to chat. She always tried to reassure me she was really good looking back. But with this guy she says were only friends and uve been insecure in the past . I dident mention that ive been asked to leave because she cant live like walking on egg shells I fought it and she agreed for a while she wanted me to get counselling so I started that. Shes being good shes tring to help me find a place and wants to be friends. Ive been looking at stuff online to try and save my marrage. but like I said this guy is over all the time his mom who is the boss of the co things there bonking she told me then she said she set her strat there not there just friend Ive been insucure about there friendship they laugh talk all that stuff more than we do. then they go to work all day. shes learned a bunch of makinical stuff from this guy that I would have loved to have teach her but when i was chargin a battier or changing breakes on the family car she wasent interested. BUT HES GREAT. I do love her but right now I feel so insignificant and usless. I dont know what to do. I dont have anyone to talk to out here she has a network of friends I have work buddies that i am not all that close to. I know this is winded. Should I bother or should I just go and forget her. The thing that sucks is I dont feel like I have any thing to offer any body and will just be alone watching the love of my life bloosem
sugarmomma Posted April 1, 2009 Posted April 1, 2009 Sorry to hear that you are going through this. Sometimes the marriage gets so bad until it is beyond repair. I am sure there were signs before that things were going south. That is one thing about problems- just because you ignore them, they don't go away. You say that you are in counseling so I would suggest that you stick with it. As far as she is concerned, it sounds like she has made up her mind and there is absolutely nothing you can do about that. I wish we could make people want to be with us. They would all be miserable and so would we. I wish you the best.
Chrome Barracuda Posted April 1, 2009 Posted April 1, 2009 File under adultery, expose and get your ducks in order if the marriage is ending, end it with style. Why dont you have your kids, tell her upfront you arent paying child support, when she's clearly involved with someone else, she should not deserve sole custody. You have grown apart but what does she do, get involved with someone else? that's a sure fire way for fixing the marriage! yeah right!!! Overall, it may sound angry but your putting boundries on your future. You should not wait for her to return home, start packing up her stuff and seperate ban accounts. Do a 180. Let the new OM be her sounding board and move on with your life. She's cheating and there's no way to really slice that. I'm sorry. Be strong and focus on yourself, your wife is dead.
Author jmhurts Posted April 3, 2009 Author Posted April 3, 2009 I dont think she is sexualy engaugeing but deffinetly emotionaly I think she dosent give a what I do. I think maybe your right just end it. She says she loves me and wants me to move out and fix my problems. What dose that mean for better or worest or when I get tiered of it.
sumdude Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 I dont think she is sexualy engaugeing but deffinetly emotionaly I think she dosent give a what I do. I think maybe your right just end it. She says she loves me and wants me to move out and fix my problems. What dose that mean for better or worest or when I get tiered of it. Allright man.. here's some tough love if you can handle it. What do YOU want? You seem to have found yourself in the position of doubting what you have to offer to anyone. It's about time you stood up and asked HEY, what about me!? Stand up and be counted, you matter, what you want matters, you're not just some chess piece to be moved around and taken for granted. She wants a change? She makes it, you stay put and tell her that she moves out if she wants to break it.
Author jmhurts Posted April 3, 2009 Author Posted April 3, 2009 you know i here what your saying and in someways i agree but i thing the insuing backlash would be very bad for my kids we talked tonight nd i amm leaving next week s freinds and i would still like to fix it if i can i thought and still think we hav more left
Gunny376 Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 I've dealt with this for over twenty years in the Marines! When the "Buddy" moves in as a roomate? The "Buddy" ends up scrogging the wife / GF ~ 99.99+% of the time! NewsFlash! Threesomes don't work! Open marriages don't work! I've never tried any of them! But I've seen plenty of them fail! Swinging doesn't work!
Author jmhurts Posted April 3, 2009 Author Posted April 3, 2009 Ive have not been thinking straight for while like i sid iam 3500 miles from famiely. I think iam going bck to see them nd when i get back moving out. Tell you what I think its just done. Its sd and it hurts rel bad dut light dawns over marbil head. Iam done tring to stay and i wont beg to come back. Its what she wants she can have it. I am not a bad guy and maybe she dosent relize just how good it was.but i think someday she will. thats not my problem.
seibert253 Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 She's fallin' for your move in. Chances are they also involve in a physical relationship. As long as the "roomate" is around, your marriage is done.
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