sally21 Posted March 29, 2009 Posted March 29, 2009 I was dating my boyfriend on and off for over a year thn we fell in love and decided to get together , we wnt through a rough patch of little arguments so we decided too break up and take a break for a while i found out that he had slep with a girl out of his job the next day i was heart broken as when i found ou we where back talking and i really love him , i dont know the girl but she made up lies about me saying i was going through his emails and thats how i found out as she had not said any thing to any1 but i wud never invade his privacy like that , he fell out with her and told me that they no longer speak that he has blankd her , but then today i was on facebook and had a look at his profile n seen that she had left a comment today and could not understand why she would write to him if they are not talking so i spoke to him about i but he went mad and could not understand what i was trying to say . He has told me that nothing will ever happen with them again but i cant help being paronoid that it will happen again as they work together , how can i stop this paronoia ?
bean1 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 It isn't uncommon for people to make lies because the truth will upset their partner. For example, he may have no interest in wanting to be with her, and talking to her won't lead to anything, BUT since he knows you would be upset that they still talk, he lied and said that they don't. Is she a coworker or did he just meet her through work? If she is a coworker then it is likely that they would still have contact. When you went on a "break", did that mean no dating others or did it mean you could do whatever you wanted? Breaks mean different things to different people. I'm not sure how you can stop being paranoid other than trust him. I don't know how you are going to do that though because he has lied. Did he lie because he is a dog(?) or because nothing would happen but he didn't want you to be mad? Only you can make that decision, maybe you need to take time to figure it out.
Author sally21 Posted March 30, 2009 Author Posted March 30, 2009 thanx you for your reply. she is a coworker, that is why i find it hard to believe that he does not talk to her, i was thinking the same thing that he just said it so i would not get upset but I asked him and he has said that it is not true that they fell out. The comment she left him on facebook yesterday makes me believe that she is determin , it is like she is never going to go away. She caused trouble between us when we wer first getting back together I wish she would just go away.
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