clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 So is it safe to say that when you said this: The odds of an older woman actually conceiving a Downs baby are low because it is detectable. You were dead wrong then? Well that's your problem. Chances are you could even end up with a woman who had an abortion and will never know about it. As long as she's not aborting MINE I'm OK. Besides young women could have deformed babies as well especially a woman with a much older man. You would proceed with the birth if your woman gave you a Down's child? It is a possibility that cannot be ruled out. Since we can only control some things, I choose to worry most about the ones I can control. The others are worthy of consideration but since I cannot change them there is no use trying to do so. They might determine whether something is feasible or not. For instance if I was a 41 year old woman I would probably NOT spend a lot of time at this point in time thinking about meeting someone and starting a family. I would rather try to do something else that would be satisfying.
pollywag Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 As long as she's not aborting MINE I'm OK. Well let's hope YOUR old sperm doesn't produce a deformed baby, for your own sake.
Jersey Shortie Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 For instance if I was a 41 year old woman I would probably NOT spend a lot of time at this point in time thinking about meeting someone and starting a family. I would rather try to do something else that would be satisfying. I think I would advice a 41 year old man to do the same. He should pursue other satisfying pursuits. There is nothing wrong with that and he shouldn't bring a woman down because of his failure to start a family at a resonable healthy age.
CommitmentPhobe Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 For instance if I was a 41 year old woman I would probably NOT spend a lot of time at this point in time thinking about meeting someone and starting a family. I would rather try to do something else that would be satisfying. Really easy to say something like that objectively isn't it? For instance if I was a 40 something year old guy I would stop chasing women half my age, but try telling that to a 40 year old guy that thinks he's still got it
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Scuba diving isn't good for the body. Once in awhile, fine, but as a hobby, very bad for your body. Not good father material... Can you cite a good source? All the sources I have researched (and it's quite a few) say that careful recreational divers are at minimal risk for any serious injury and even those who are not careful generally have minor neurological damage as the most common complaint. I'd like to know more. I do try to be very meticulous in my planning and execution.
pollywag Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 For instance if I was a 41 year old woman I would probably NOT spend a lot of time at this point in time thinking about meeting someone and starting a family. I would rather try to do something else that would be satisfying. Since you are not a woman, and you can only think like a displaced 40+ man, then I would leave that up to what the woman wants. I know two women that met their men in their late 30's one had a baby at 41 and the other at 39. You can try to play god all you want but there is only one god in this world. Love is like that when it happens it happens, of course you wouldn't understand this concept since you sit around scheming your future via calculations an an Excel spreadsheet. While the rest of the world procreates and loves freely.
Star Gazer Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 I'm not interested in reignating the whole debate, but the odds are not that great. Getting pregnant at the age of 40 is estimated to be associated with about 1 in 100 chance of having a baby with Downs (from 1:400 at 35) and keep increasing thereafter). While mathematically these are certainly not at all scary odds, they're nothing to be too excited about either and to deny the emotional effect they have on people is silly as well. The same holds true regardless of the GENDER of the parent. A 40-year old MALE conceiving with a 25 year old woman has the same risks as a 40-year old female conceiving with a 25 year old man. Do your research.
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Really easy to say something like that objectively isn't it? Of course - it's the logical conclusion. For instance if I was a 40 something year old guy I would stop chasing women half my age .... Good plan if that works for you. Personally I just let them catch me now, I'm not as fast as I used to be ya know.
Trialbyfire Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 The same holds true regardless of the GENDER of the parent. A 40-year old MALE conceiving with a 25 year old woman has the same risks as a 40-year old female conceiving with a 25 year old man. Do your research. Yes. I just made that point in another thread. Aging male sperm contributes to 50% of Down syndrome babies. No matter how young a woman is, if his sperm is fragmented, the baby will turn out the same way.
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Well let's hope YOUR old sperm doesn't produce a deformed baby, for your own sake. I'll probably use the frozen stuff but there is risk in everything.
CommitmentPhobe Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Good plan if that works for you. Personally I just let them catch me now, I'm not as fast as I used to be ya know. Poor old chap. No respect those kids these days, just mug anyone don't they?
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 The same holds true regardless of the GENDER of the parent. A 40-year old MALE conceiving with a 25 year old woman has the same risks as a 40-year old female conceiving with a 25 year old man. Do your research. The study I looked at said nothing of the sort - can you cite your source?
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Poor old chap. No respect those kids these days, just mug anyone don't they? Yes! I had the hell 'mugged' out of me just last weekend! Then she cooked dinner for the two of us. Crazy kids.
Trialbyfire Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 The study I looked at said nothing of the sort - can you cite your source? Cite your source first and while you're at it, why not see if you can refute the rest of this list? Facts about males over 40, causing breeding problems, due to DNA fragmentation in sperm: Non-verbal intelligence of children, declines exclusively due to paternal age.Greater rate of miscarriage, infertility and birth defects due to fragmentation of DNA.Children born to men from 40 and up have six times the risk of having autism, than from men under 30.The risk of children developing prostate and breast cancer later in life, is due to paternal age.Exclusively due to aging paternal sperm are the risks of Apert Syndrome, Crouzon syndrome, Pfeiffer syndrome, dwarfism, and 50% of Down syndrome cases.Paternal aging sperm contribute to a higher percentage of schizophrenia.Is everyone with me so far?
PinkKittyKat Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Wow, this is the definition of "baby rabies". I feel like time is running out for me to find someone if I want to have kids. I now seem to throw myself at every man I meet. New guy started at work recently (but not on my team) and from talking to him briefly it looked like he is single. As soon as I got home I searched for him on Facebook and sent him a friend request. He accepted like 3 days later and is probably thinking WTF. The thing is that I don't find him particularly attractive or feel that we have hit it off in any way but he is a single guy in my age range My aunt had kids at 41... I think you're doing okay.
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Cite your source first and while you're at it, why not see if you can refute the rest of this list? This is my source, from an earlier thread and I'm not interested in refutation, I want to know the truth. Please show me your source(s).
Trialbyfire Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Paternity Down Syndrome Study One of my sources...
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Paternity Down Syndrome Study One of my sources... "Men over age 40 were twice as likely to have a Down syndrome child than men less than 20 years old," Interesting result, however remember a woman aged 40 is 14x more likely to have a Downs baby than a woman aged 20. I'd like to know what the actual risk is, for instance, a woman aged 40 has a 99% chance of conceiving a non-Downs child whereas a woman aged 20-24 has a 99.9993% chance of making a non-Downs baby. Any comparable figures for men?
Isolde Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 Cite your source first and while you're at it, why not see if you can refute the rest of this list? "Non-verbal intelligence of children, declines exclusively due to paternal age." This is really intriguing. My nonverbal intelligence is much lower than my sister's, though not terrible, and my dad was around 40 when I was born. This must also be why a lot of younger siblings have a lower math and science ability than their older siblings.
Trialbyfire Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 "Non-verbal intelligence of children, declines exclusively due to paternal age." This is really intriguing. My nonverbal intelligence is much lower than my sister's, though not terrible, and my dad was around 40 when I was born. This must also be why a lot of younger siblings have a lower math and science ability than their older siblings. That's an interesting perspective Isolde. It's possible.
clv0116 Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 "Non-verbal intelligence of children, declines exclusively due to paternal age." This is really intriguing. The study I cited above said the results were not conclusive, but that no more than a 3 point IQ drop was observed between children of fathers aged 20 and those with fathers aged 50. Contrast that with the 2.3 point IQ drop that a second surviving child has compared to a first surviving child and it's interesting but not a big deal.
moman Posted March 30, 2009 Posted March 30, 2009 I don't see why age is such an argument here. The bigger issues is BEG saying she is desperate, and unsure what to do. The best thing for her NOT to do is to act desperate and act like she has a ticking clock. All guys know about the clock, and it bothers some more than others. For me, my last GF was 34 (I'm 30) and it didn't bother me. I'm my small sample with unscientific results, 9 of the 10 women I've dated over 30 had a sense of desperation and a ticking clock. They also acted bitter about being in that situation, as many believed they would meet the man of their dreams in college while being 21 and be happily married at 25, celebrate a 50th wedding anniversary at 75, etc. What I do NOT understand is why the same women who are complaining about the ticking clock have all been in long term relationships that didn't work out or dated *******s, and then suddenly wake up at 31 freaked out.
Sam Spade Posted March 31, 2009 Posted March 31, 2009 What I do NOT understand is why the same women who are complaining about the ticking clock have all been in long term relationships that didn't work out or dated *******s, and then suddenly wake up at 31 freaked out. This is the real issue here, at least for me. Age per se is not such a huge deal. But being over 30 and single without a *good* reason (e.g. settling into a difficult educational path/career, been screwed over by the person you though you'd marry, major life hardships, you *honestly* were not interested in a LTR etc.) I think quite often correlates with significant emotional issues, and that's the real turnoff, not the age per se. It is certainly not a hopeless situation, but it takes a lot of effort and emotional energy to resolve at the core...
pollywag Posted March 31, 2009 Posted March 31, 2009 This is the real issue here, at least for me. Age per se is not such a huge deal. But being over 30 and single without a *good* reason (e.g. settling into a difficult educational path/career, been screwed over by the person you though you'd marry, major life hardships, you *honestly* were not interested in a LTR etc.) I think quite often correlates with significant emotional issues, and that's the real turnoff, not the age per se. It is certainly not a hopeless situation, but it takes a lot of effort and emotional energy to resolve at the core... Well you are over 30 and single not married yet, should women stay away from you since you must be plagued with emotional baggage and significant emotional issues? You are not hopeless but it must take a lot of energy and resolve to deal with your core emotional issues.
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