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In Love with a married man... and invited for a threesome


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Posted

I’ve got myself in an awful situation.... Here’s how I ended up where I’m at...

Over a year ago I met a man in passing... I was really attracted to him... Even though I didn’t want to be I knew he was a married man....

9 Months after seeing him for the first time I figured I would finally just give him a smile and say hello... He said hello and gave me a huge smile in return.... this went on everyday for a couple weeks... When one morning I smiled waved and he smiled and blew me a kiss... I was totally floored... I thought to myself that didn’t just happen... So the next day when I saw him I waved and smiled and in return I got a smile and another kiss blown to me... Of course I was tickled because I was very attracted to him... we started talking when we saw each other.... then we exchanged numbers and began talking for hours at a time... until his wife found out.... she called me.... we talked for days and kind of worked threw things and her and I started talking on a regular basis and kinda of became friends... all the while him and I couldn’t stay away from each other.. and my feelings for him grew stronger..... we continued to sneak and talk to each other and see each other when ever we could... After this going on for over 6 months I found my self totally in love with him.... but I feel so lost and confused and i feel like such a heel here I am in love with a married man and have be friended his wife....

But it gets worse.... Now his wife and I are friends and she’s been saying how beautiful i am and that she wants me to have a threesome with her and him.... OMG....

What do you say to that....

I don’t know what to do....

People say just cut the both of them out of your life but that’s easier said then done especially when there’s feelings involved....

Posted

Do you actually want to sleep with her? :eek:

 

Look -- for any of this stuff to work, I assume all three of you have to be honest.... not that threesomes are my cup of tea, but I assume its better that all three of you know where you stand emotionally... try being honest, will you?

 

I assume you haven't slept with her H yet? Or have you?

 

Really, you are betraying your friend's trust in you. I wouldn't do that to her... you and H are going to hurt her so much with a Double Betrayal.

Posted

What do you do? Say NO. Please, just say no.

 

I've been in her shoes once, ugh. I was young and experimental. That sort of thing can work when there are either no feelings involved (polyandry) or all-the-way-round feelings involved (polyamory.) One time, an ex and I allowed a woman in, who claimed to respect boundaries (in order to get invited in) but I later learned was DELIBERATELY trying to steal my boyfriend, it was a betrayal on every level. It hurt me emotionally, sexually, and really messed up my trust in women.

 

Don't mess her up like that! You're sexually using her open-mindedness to get deeper with him. :mad:

 

Yeah, I know this is hypocritcal. I betrayed my xMM's W for the couple months we dated before he first separated. But I never met or had my own relationship with her. To me, it's a worse betrayal when you act like a friend to their face. And having sex with the BS is an even deeper intimacy, therefore a deeper betrayal imo.

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Posted

No I dont want to sleep with her... Never been with a woman dont really wanna be with a woman....

 

I told her that....I cant have a threesome with them....

No matter how much I love and care about him I just cant do that...

 

And no I havent slept with him either.... Even though she thinks I should......

 

Im just totally floored by all this... she knows I care about him... she knows I told him I love him... so she knows there feelings involved.... But she doesnt know that were talking other than just when she knows we are...

 

At first I thought she was just joking... but shes not shes serious... I really think if she had her way he would just have the both of us in his life on a permenant basis... and becuase she feels that way the 3some is just a way to fufill a fantasy for him....

 

IDK.... Im so confused by the whole thing....

Posted

Oh gross, I vurped. :sick:

 

I could NEVER watch the man I love touch or kiss another woman. NEVER.

Posted

Maybe she's cheating on him and this relieves her guilt and/or she's trying to unload him onto you! :p

 

They could BOTH be using you.

 

The answer is the same: Say no and stay away!

Posted

I'd say go ahead and sleep with them

 

That way, when you REALLY fall head over heels for him because he's so good in bed you can make yourself even MORE miserable than you already are.

 

And you get to contend with the wife becoming infatuated with you while you are nuts for her man ..... sounds like a lot of fun to me.

 

I mean .... why wouldn't you want to totally screw up your life and drive yourself crazy for the next year or so.

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Posted

I really think this chicks twisted in the head,

 

She just called and says well if your not up for a threesome can u just do him... hes more on the wild side and theres things I just wont do or try... So maybe you can take care of him in the areas Im lacking....

 

I just sat with my mouth open... I was like I dont think that would be a good idea... she said its a great idea... and hes amazing in bed... I hope you say yes...

 

Im like No not a good Idea she said he said he didnt think it was a good idea either...

 

OMG.... she has to be out of her mind... I really think that its a way for her to hold on to him.... she knows that we care about each other and maybe she thinks if she lets him have his cake and eat it too he wont go any where.....

 

I need to just distance myself from the situation.... getting a little too freaky for me.... I thought the 3some was out there but never in a million years thought she would just offer him up to me like a piece of meat

Posted

Flash, LOL. that is too funny:bunny: but true.

 

Leave him alone since he will hae absolutely no respect for you if you do it. Doesn't seem to have a lot of respect for you now, so you might as well have some for yourself. Besides, you don't even like women. What's up with that? It would only be for him and what would you get? A wet azz.

Posted

Wow. They are treating you like a prostitute on call, but without the pay. I wouldn't have anything to do with either of them. You are asking for it by involving yourself in an 'open' arrangement with these two. It is never as simple or easy as you may think, and invariably someone gets hurt. In this case, it will likely be you.

Posted
OMG.... she has to be out of her mind... I really think that its a way for her to hold on to him.... she knows that we care about each other and maybe she thinks if she lets him have his cake and eat it too he wont go any where.....

Yanno, I've met women who engage in 3-ways as a way to keep their man. But they still act more reluctantly. For example, they want to make sure you understand that SHE is the primary and so forth.

 

No, doll. I think she knows exactly what she's doing. She's unloading him. I don't think she's crazy, but I betcha HE is! :lmao:

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Posted
No, doll. I think she knows exactly what she's doing. She's unloading him. I don't think she's crazy, but I betcha HE is! :lmao:

 

LOL... you might be right.... Im still in shock.....:eek:

Posted

I think she has a man on the side herself and wants to aliviate her guilt by giving permission for you to bed him.

Posted

Your MM and his wife are toying with you and your feelings for him... after all you are an adorable, naive "countrychick" so this situation must be quite entertaining for them.

 

And quite likely MM's wife is toying with him as well.

Posted

ahhhhh .... they sound like some of those "swingers" that live an open lifestyle.

 

To them it would just be sex ... to you it would be more.

 

You're gonna get hurt here girl ..... you're just a toy to them.

Posted

Best you stop the friendship with her now... at least there is a plausible reason for ending the R with her -- that she is trying to convince you to overstep the boundaries of your friendship with her, her H, and her M.

 

As for your A with her H, can you bring yourself to extricate yourself from that?

Posted

These two are treating you like a sex toy! Don't do it. If you ever want to try a threesome, there are plenty of people out there who, you know, actually have some ethics about it.

 

Sounds like you don't even want to try. So don't. Just back away slowly... until you can turn your back and RUN LIKE HECK. :)

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Posted

Thanks for the advice...

Posted

I'd say the W is bisexual and they're definitely swingers. And you?...

You are their project, subject and flavor for the moment. You're not the first, nor will you be the last proposition.

 

Don't be surprised if they have a hidden video camera and replay the movie with you as the star. If not, his W may end up holding the camera while her H do you. You also don't know who else they might invite in on the fun...may not be just the H alone on it.

 

Think REEAAAL hard. You've got two options.

 

1. Be smart and run like hell

2. Pretend to be stupid and go along

Posted

You are their project, subject and flavor for the moment. You're not the first, nor will you be the last proposition.

 

that's what ran through my mind when OP described how the guy's wife befriended her, then proposed the three-way. Honey, they're trolling for someone to play their games, and it's not beyond them to uses your feelings for the husband to lure you in.

 

while your feelings are valid, do you really want to get involved in something like this? SInce you're posting here, my guess is you probably don't, but are allowing your tender feelings to keep you from straight out saying, "no thanks."

Posted

This is madness!!! something probably doesnt feel right to you, watch the knife come out when her husband's on top.

Posted
This is madness!!! something probably doesnt feel right to you, watch the knife come out when her husband's on top.

 

lol chrome barracuda -- I am looking at the knife coming out in your avatar.

Posted

RUN as fast as you can, away from both of them. You are inlove with the MM, and to you it won't be just sex...You'll be emotionally bonding with him, making love..Opening up, feeling and being vunerable..To him it'll just be hot sex and a fun sexual experience to share with his wife. He isn't inlove with you, nor will he allow any kind of romantic/intimate feelings to be felt..

 

Find someone single who can return your love, not some MM who is willing to share his body with two women.

  • Author
Posted
This is madness!!! something probably doesnt feel right to you, watch the knife come out when her husband's on top.

 

 

Kinda sounds like what my best friend said she told me dont do it no matter how much you wanna be with him she said even if she says you can be with him on your own dont do it... She said it sounds like some crazy crime of passion and she'd probably just kill us both....

Posted

So my question is...does this NOT change how you feel about this guy overall?

 

Clearly he's not what you were thinking he was at this point either.

 

Time to pack it in and move on to someone who's single...and doesn't engage in this kind of behavior.

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