kizik Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 Hey, as I mentioned in another thread, today is my ex-GF's b-day. Don't worry, I'm not going to call or contact, but I was hoping people would express their experiences with this difficult day. Of course I am thinking about her today. I do feel like after today, there won't be a single day in the year that is a bigger reminder of her. Do you guys get bummed on your exes' b-day, too? Thanks in advance for replies. -Josh
Author kizik Posted March 27, 2009 Author Posted March 27, 2009 *sigh*... c'mon now, please give me some support, I'm going CRAZY!
northstar1 Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 Hey, as I mentioned in another thread, today is my ex-GF's b-day. Don't worry, I'm not going to call or contact, but I was hoping people would express their experiences with this difficult day. Of course I am thinking about her today. I do feel like after today, there won't be a single day in the year that is a bigger reminder of her. Do you guys get bummed on your exes' b-day, too? Thanks in advance for replies. -Josh I got bummed on her dday (we had broken up a few weeks before), and over the holidays, etc. For sure, it is a fixed date on the calendar of something we remember from the past. The good thing is, as you said, tomorrow is a new day, and no more crappy days like that again. And by next year, you'll be thinking "who?"
Author kizik Posted March 27, 2009 Author Posted March 27, 2009 Hey north, yeah, it just sucks to think about her doing something fun on Spring Break with her family and new BF. Having sex with him, laughing, etc. Grrr. Just waiting for tomorrow...
northstar1 Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 Hey north, yeah, it just sucks to think about her doing something fun on Spring Break with her family and new BF. Having sex with him, laughing, etc. Grrr. Just waiting for tomorrow... or maybe she didnt' get the pony she wanted for her bday and is up in her room having a tantrum? it's not all roses in their lives w/o us brother!! tomorrow is soon, try and go out tonight for a beer or that.
Author kizik Posted March 27, 2009 Author Posted March 27, 2009 Haha, thanks man. Yeah, she's a princess. Hasn't changed a bit. I saw it all over her face the other day at the bus stop. "it's not all roses in their lives w/o us brother!!" I'll try to keep that in mind.
Peter_pan Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 on my ex's bday, i flew away on holiday with two mates ! its harder on my own bday cause it was our anniversary date
foxh1234 Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 Hey Kiz, it's tough man but you'll get through it ok. My ex's has passed and it was a long day for sure. We are not in their lives anymore, the day should be like any other, maybe next year. Play your guitar and all troubles will go away. It works for me:D
LikeCharlotte Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 Do you guys get bummed on your exes' b-day, too? I'm about to find out. I'll let you know how it goes. From now on it will be just another day and someday you wont even remember the date. *sings loudly in her head* lalalalalalalalalidonthearyouihearnodatelalalalalalalala hang in kiz.
LakesideDream Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 *sigh*... c'mon now, please give me some support, I'm going CRAZY! The first couple of years I sent my ex a small token on her B-day, and left it at that. The last 6 nothing, it slipped my mind, and was just another day. I think this year I'll send her a silly card. Dogs on it or something. Seems civil.
entityzero Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 hey kiz, just wanted to offer my support to you, i'll be facing the same thing in early april. my ex txted me on my birthday a few weeks back but nothing more than your standard happy birthday, so thats what she'll get on hers. she f**ked me over though so im sure part of her msg was to lift some of her guilt, but ether way i got SOMETHING. it bothered me a bit but i would of been more upset to not get anything. but its true what others say, it really is just another day and be thankful that you didnt have to spend a couple of hundered bucks on her right?? go out, drink up and remember that next year you'll be celebrating your new girls birthday! thanks for your support on my threads aswell man, good luck
sockpuppet Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I feel you there...my ex said nothing on my last birthday though I did for hers. This one coming up should be interesting because it's in a few days and I'd ordered a small thoughtful gift for her before the debacle that happened this past weekend. It's already shipped and I can't stop it You're a good guy to care and think of her like that, though. I suck with birthdays but I remember all my exes' back to 8th grade (May 21).
flash582 Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 You need to start dating again ..... the sooner you get back out there the quicker she'll become a memory. I know you don't feel like it .... you just want to lay in bed and feel sorry for yourself. But, trust me .... it was the only way I got over my ex of 20 years of marriage. And, believe it or not, I ended up meeting my soulmate.
Author kizik Posted March 28, 2009 Author Posted March 28, 2009 i would of been more upset to not get anything. Yep. That's where I'm at. I got no acknowledgment from her of my b-day on Jan. 27th. So I did nothing for her today, March 27th. thanks for your support on my threads aswell man, good luck You're welcome dude. And thanks. You're a good guy to care and think of her like that, though. Thanks for replying SP. IDK if I'm 'good' or not. Like you, though, I can't help remembering people's b-days who have been meaningful to me. You need to start dating again ..... the sooner you get back out there the quicker she'll become a memory. I've been trying to date. Maybe you're some suave homeboy who can get any chick, any time. I'm not. I know you don't feel like it .... you just want to lay in bed and feel sorry for yourself. Sorry, but you don't know me at all, and you have no idea what you're talking about in relation to me. Maybe for the first week, I lay in bed and pitied myself. But it's been 10 months. Go ahead and sue me for still having some lingering feelings for the girl.
Peter_pan Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 LD, if it was another day for you then how would you know you havnt given her a card for the past 6! lol nothing wrong with lingering feelings man. i know all about them jus go out n have a laugh, for me last night is what being single is all about lol. if i was with my ex id never be able to hang out with 6 girls and my guy mates. not trying to defend flash, but if he was married for 20 years, he would be wayy out of the game imo lol
openbook08 Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 hey kizik, the first of everything is bound to be poignant and difficult:lmao: ive done xmas, his bday, val day, our anniversary & finally my bday last week....despite all my bravado i did hope hed wish me happy bday (even tho it makes NO sense for him 2 do so, but ya know the way ya go a little crazy when it comes to the ex!!) he didnt. im but a distant memory now. as with most of us it just doesnt seem fair. he hurt me so bad, got a second chance, did same again & without a 2nd thought straight away new girlf, moved in together after less than 4months.... &yet im still here talkin about bdays & anniversarys!! i try not to dwell too much & for the most part i get on really great with my life... just now and again... but each day is a step forward...FORWARD! as long as we're headed in that direction take your time & allow yourself to grieve and progress and express yourself at your own pace X i, for one, will not be suing you!!
Chrome Barracuda Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 Keep it moving, focus on some new women in your life.
sedgwick Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 This is where I'm thankful I can never remember people's birthdays. I know his is in Oct but I don't remember the day. After the first year, when you've passed all the important dates once, it does get better. I was a lot better this V-Day than last year.
sunshinegirl Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I agree with the "firsts" without them being really hard. First Thanksgiving without him, first Christmas, etc. I am constantly thinking "what were we doing a year ago?" and the good news, I suppose, is that after May 4, none of my "1 year ago" remembrances will have him in them. A year ago right now? We were in Paris. I get a bit of a pang but then I remember that it was kind of a crappy trip! Beginning of the end, maybe. Not sure. Again, just let it ride. Time is a crazy healer. I've found myself almost wanting to run into my ex lately. I am pretty sure he's not a very happy man these days and I must be wanting some visual confirmation of it. (Though if I *actually* ran into him I would probably be posting something similar to you!) I, on the other hand, am making a lot of strides in counseling - have had some big breakthroughs in recent weeks - and I am feeling more and more happy and confident about my future. The ex really would not have fit into the vision I'm forming for my life. You're still grieving. Don't be hard on yourself. As GreenCove said, you loved deeply and it is truly a gift that you feel as deeply as you do. It's easy to forget that not everyone has the ability to love deeply.
Author kizik Posted March 28, 2009 Author Posted March 28, 2009 Thanks again to all responders. Life is really hard right now. I don't have any close friends or family. It's always been this way, but I'm able to distract myself with weed most of the time. Now I'm out of weed. Please no lectures on the weed. It's one of the only things keeping me alive. You'd do it too if you were me.
Nikki Sahagin Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 Thanks again to all responders. Life is really hard right now. I don't have any close friends or family. It's always been this way, but I'm able to distract myself with weed most of the time. Now I'm out of weed. Please no lectures on the weed. It's one of the only things keeping me alive. You'd do it too if you were me. I find life just as hard but don't do weed - then again I have issues with anything that gets me 'out of control' - bit of a control freak. This day will be very difficult naturally, I guess you have to keep yourself occupied through it in some way. Or just imagine she's having a terrible time
Peter_pan Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 Thanks again to all responders. Life is really hard right now. I don't have any close friends or family. It's always been this way, but I'm able to distract myself with weed most of the time. Now I'm out of weed. Please no lectures on the weed. It's one of the only things keeping me alive. You'd do it too if you were me. yep my break up is what brought me to smoke some weed. id never smoked or done any drugs until this point... just obv dont do too much wish i could hang out with you mate. stay strong
Author kizik Posted March 28, 2009 Author Posted March 28, 2009 John Frusciante from the Red Hot Chili Peppers got into heroin during the late '90s. In an post-sober interview, someone asked him something like: "How do you feel about that dark time in your life?" Frusciante said something like: "Huh? I enjoyed it a lot. Wasn't a dark time at all." That's how I feel about weed. It's great and a lot of fun.
EmperorR Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I know how it is, but for weed enter videogames, since my ex left me I bought a ps3,360 and wii, after work thats all I do to keep my mind busy
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