Jackson24 Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 Sorry this is long, but PLEASE read. I need advice. The first day of spring break my GF went to a party, neglected to call me all night after saying she would, got drunk, and passed out at the party with her friend. Not a big deal to me, I don't want to be the BF who makes there GF feel trapped or restricted. I eventually forgave her, but first she told me she wasn't going to do anything like that again, unless I was with her. By the way she staying with a friend bc her mom is out of town. So the next weekend (still spring break) both fri. and sat she tells me she can't go out, her friends parents won't let them. Both nights she spent the night out. One night she went back to her place with her friend, and didn't invite me bc her friend didn't want to feel like a "third wheel". But then her friend,"supposedly" calls up some guys but she doesn't call me still. Her excuse was she passed out.. (drugs). According to her nothing happened that night. The other night she went to a small party at like 7, again she did not call me, and afterward people went back to her house. After interrogating her she told me she did ecstacy and hooked up with some guy (for like 15 sec according to her). She doesn't usually do drugs but she said it was spring break and everyone else was. I'm mad she hooked up with some guy, but was less mad bc she was on ecstacy, even though i think its retarded for her to have done, and she said it was stupid too. Even though when I thinkabout it I am disgusted and get this bad feeling in my heart, I'm more angry that she never called all these times, what seems to be purposely ignoring me and lying to me before and afterwards about it. She told me how sorry she was and how much she loved me and how she would never do it again; that she would be a good GF. With all this, I'm very confused. Mainly because when I'm with her I can see how hard she's fallen for me. She randomly will call to say she misses me or loves me. And I can tell she really does love me, and has very, very strong feelings for me. I've been with a lot of girls and I just know she means everything. But then how can she do this stuff? It doesn't make sense to me. I was about to break up with her but after seeing how distraught she was I couldn't do it and I forgave her, after she said how she was going to change, and be a good gf, and not do any of it again, and how she loved me more than anyone she's ever been with (and i believe her bc i knew her when she was with her other bfs and she never said she loved them). And I believe she means it now, I just don't know if she can keep the promises. What should I do, I love her, but I keep thinking about how she compulsively lied to me and kissed this other guy. I don't want to be taken advantage of, and think its stupid I'm giving her another chance. Its just I can see her feelings for me so it confuses me. What would you do?
lostsunsets Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 She ignored, she disrespected you, she lied to you, she betrayed you. She didn't want you around her because she wanted to do everything she did. She says she took x. Proof? She said it was 15 seconds. Proof? She spread her legs for another guy. When spring break ended. She sold you a bill of goods. I guess your forgiveness is based upon her feelings, not her actions. She cuckolded you with at least one other man. If you're OK with that once, you will be OK with it next spring break. Good luck.
Bryanp Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 You judge a person by their actions and not by their words. Her actions clearly show she has no respect for you at and is playing you for a big fool. If this is how she acts when she loves somebody then God help you. How much more humiliation and disrespect are you willing to endure. Her actions indicate that she sees you as a complete doormat. Surely you can do better than this!
samsungxoxo Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 You gotta be kidding into thinking that she only kissed the guy. My guess is that she had sex with the other guy or if not then she did the other stuff with him. Right she's using you like a doormat, time to dump her because she does any more damage to your self-esteem.
Beautiful Inside Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 ok let me start by saying SHE DOESNT LOVE YOU. if a girl or guy cheats on you they dont give a **** how bad its going to hurt you or the effect it may have on your relationship. i would never ever cheat on anyone ever i would never want it done to me i wouldn't never ever do it to someone else weather was in love with them or not! does that clear anything up. i feel like you need to break things off if you think your going to cheat or not interested in the person any longer. why is that so hard to do! isn't it harder to hurt the person that you supposedly love? or that really loves you how are you even thinking of them?... im sorry but if i were you i would forget about this girl honestly she cheated on you plan and simple and she will do it again if you take her back.
rainbowbrite Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 your gf has sum major self esteem issues. i cannot believe she did x because everyone was doing it. that is just laughable
EmperorR Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 She cheated, don't do what I do, don't beg, say its your fault etc., ITS NOT. You don't deserve someone like this in your life,someone who disrespected you, someone who was greedy and shelfish, the trust is gone, its done over, be happy you weren't married with kids. Who cares about how distraught "how she feels" haha, she didn't take into consideration your feelings when she was smooching with some other guy. Look forward not back, get this scum cheating scum out of your life, detoxify yourself from this situation, I'm speaking from experience.
mr.dream merchant Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 She feels distraught? Lmao mannn...tell that bitch to stfu.
jnj express Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 You don't really believe nothing happened all those other times, she knows how to lie real good. The best advice you should take with you is what you have already been given, dump her. Also do not tell me you are an expert on love cuz you have been with a few chicks, love is complicated and tough and has many facets. If you are fool enough to want to stay with this GF, then you draw a line in the sand. She goes out only with you, she has no other social outlets. If she can't follow that rule then you need to tell her to get out of your life.
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