lolly21 Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 I have been going out with my boyfriend for three and a half years now, and living together for three of those years. Over the last couple of months we have been under increased stress which has resulted in a lot of sill fights. He has been spending less time with me recently, after one fight we had in Feb, he decided to go away with his friends over Valentines w/e, another time he had a 'boys w/e away' and barely communicated with me the entire w/e (maybe 1 or 2 texts messages the whole time) and then 2 weeks ago we had a big fight and he went out got drunk and slept with a random girl. He told me the next time I saw him which obviously devastated me. Before this fighting we were talking about getting married to each other. He told me (and still does but to a less extent) how he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Before he was all about getting married, telling me one night he was going to propose soon (that never eventuated) and now we have ended up like this. I decided to take some time out so I am staying with my mother atm. But I realise how much I love him and I want to go back so much. He said that he also wants the relationship to keep going, but he no longer wants to live together, rather leave it for a couple of years before we move back together. He plans to move in with his friends (the same ones that encouraged him to sleep with that girl) and wants to see each other a few times a week. Is it just me or is this going to make the relationship go backwards? I'm also worried that with him moving in with those guys he will be more inclined to cheat again, am I wrong to think this?
curiousnycgirl Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 How old are you guys? Sounds to me like you guys moved in together before he was really ready. What is he so stressed about? As far as living with his friends being a bad influence, they can't make him do anything - and if he cheats, then he's a cheater. Either you trust him or you don't. It's really that simple. As far as the relationship going backwards is concerned, as I said above, I don't think he's ready for the type of relationship you appear to be seeking. Are you willing to wait? If so greast, if not - move on. Good luck to you.
Trialbyfire Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 Yes, I agree, he isn't ready to settle down. First indication is that he wants to move in with his friends aka wants to continue partying and being single. I would start to distance yourself emotionally, until you're ready to move on. This guy will cheat on you again, especially considering the lack of consequence for his cheating. He knows you want him back, even after the cheating. Walk away.
Beautiful Inside Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 I have been going out with my boyfriend for three and a half years now, and living together for three of those years. Over the last couple of months we have been under increased stress which has resulted in a lot of sill fights. He has been spending less time with me recently, after one fight we had in Feb, he decided to go away with his friends over Valentines w/e, another time he had a 'boys w/e away' and barely communicated with me the entire w/e (maybe 1 or 2 texts messages the whole time) and then 2 weeks ago we had a big fight and he went out got drunk and slept with a random girl. He told me the next time I saw him which obviously devastated me. Before this fighting we were talking about getting married to each other. He told me (and still does but to a less extent) how he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Before he was all about getting married, telling me one night he was going to propose soon (that never eventuated) and now we have ended up like this. I decided to take some time out so I am staying with my mother atm. But I realise how much I love him and I want to go back so much. He said that he also wants the relationship to keep going, but he no longer wants to live together, rather leave it for a couple of years before we move back together. He plans to move in with his friends (the same ones that encouraged him to sleep with that girl) and wants to see each other a few times a week. Is it just me or is this going to make the relationship go backwards? I'm also worried that with him moving in with those guys he will be more inclined to cheat again, am I wrong to think this? girl there is no going BACKWARDS in a relationship especially yours that is considered long term. im so sorry you had to go through this you know i dont get how this works every couple fight have huge arguments if they say they dont then their a ****in liar! and then when things get hard its suppose to be ok for a guy or girl to just forget about everything and go sleep with someone else i dont ****in think so. that means they dont give a **** about you im sorry but thats the truth think about it could you ever imagine ****ing someone else?....of course not why cause he is your best friend you truly deeply genuinely sincerely have unconditional love for him and thats the way its suppose to be.
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