truwanderer04 Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 Hey, this is my first post ever. I've been with this guy for 7 years. We met in high school his freshmen year my sophmore year. We went to jr college together and I moved in w/ him when he moved away to go to a university, which was recently, the last 8 months. Our relationship was never perfect, what relationship is. We want the same things for the future. I dont know if i want it with him. I feel like moving in with him was a big mistake. I love him though. The problem is I love girls 2. If i could have both it would be perfect. Because I promised him I would never leave him and I dont want to hurt him. We own animals together and lots of other stuff and part of me thinks thats whats kept us together so long. He's changed to he used to be more attentive and caring, now he's kinda a douche who makes me cater to his every whim, and when I ask him for something no luck. What do you guys think?
DunnoWhat Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 Hey, this is my first post ever. I've been with this guy for 7 years. We met in high school his freshmen year my sophmore year. We went to jr college together and I moved in w/ him when he moved away to go to a university, which was recently, the last 8 months. Our relationship was never perfect, what relationship is. We want the same things for the future. I dont know if i want it with him. I feel like moving in with him was a big mistake. I love him though. The problem is I love girls 2. If i could have both it would be perfect. Because I promised him I would never leave him and I dont want to hurt him. We own animals together and lots of other stuff and part of me thinks thats whats kept us together so long. He's changed to he used to be more attentive and caring, now he's kinda a douche who makes me cater to his every whim, and when I ask him for something no luck. What do you guys think? When did he change? If he changed back to his old self would it help? You need to do something anyway. Maybe he's too comfortable with the situation and have gotten lazy with regards to treating you well. It might be a good thing to tell him you're unsure. It'll give him a scare and he might start treating you better.
Author truwanderer04 Posted March 26, 2009 Author Posted March 26, 2009 He changed when he moved and joined a fraternity, he puts them first. Or at least thats what it seems like to me. He'll take off work for them, but wont even do anything for my birthday. I have had talks with him, and I cry every night to sleep not that he would notice. I think he thinks I wont leave him. After so many years I dont know If i could either. I'm 23, and i dont know how to do the dating think any way.
DunnoWhat Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 He changed when he moved and joined a fraternity, he puts them first. Or at least thats what it seems like to me. He'll take off work for them, but wont even do anything for my birthday. I have had talks with him, and I cry every night to sleep not that he would notice. I think he thinks I wont leave him. After so many years I dont know If i could either. I'm 23, and i dont know how to do the dating think any way. No point staying with somebody who is making you unhappy. If you're crying yourself to sleep then you need to do something about it. If hes taking you for granted then it's time he knows that. If he likes you he'll make more of an effort.
socialight Posted March 26, 2009 Posted March 26, 2009 Your first mistake, and it is a big one, was moving in with a frat boy. You are 23 years old and bisexual. I can say with great confidence that you are not going to have a hard time meeting other guys. You owe it to yourself though to handle this with dignity. You need to tell him, in no uncertain terms, what you are unhappy about, and give him specific things he needs to change. YOU NEED TO BE SPECIFIC. You also need to move out, and don't move in again until you are married. Put genuine effort into fixing things. Make the first step. Try first, even if he doesn't. If, after reasonable time, you can say with a clean concious that you did everything you can do, and he is not responding, then dump him and move on.
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