Awesome84 Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 Question: When you are tying your hardest not to have sex with someone you like and are attracted to... is making out bad? When I say making out... I mean like kissing and stuff... No sex (no oral sex)... just hot & heavy kissing).
samspade Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 If you're not planning on having sex, but you're willing to make out, you're kind of leading the person on. Don't be a tease.
Author Awesome84 Posted March 25, 2009 Author Posted March 25, 2009 Well... I can see where it can be percieved as teasing. We both are trying not to 'do it'. I don't really think that I teased him. I wanted it BAD!! But the consequences in the long run wouldn't have been good. Which we discussed.. afterwards. So you think... making out is taking it too far if we are trying to 'Keep our clothes on'??? Ok... now that I wrote it out and saw what I said... I think I know my answer. LOL. Yes it is!
Lucky_One Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 Question: When you are tying your hardest not to have sex with someone you like and are attracted to... is making out bad? When I say making out... I mean like kissing and stuff... No sex (no oral sex)... just hot & heavy kissing). Good gosh, I think it is wonderful. Sometimes my BF and I still do just that - and deny ourselves sex - because the kissing is so daggone great. I LOVE making out with him! How is kissing someone and letting them know that you desire them leading them on? Do I have to have sex with every guy I kiss just so that some stupid man doesn't call me a tease? IMO, sex should be special and should be when both partners have discussed it and both want it equally. If one person isn't ready (or both people, for that matter), are they then relegated to sitting on opposite sides of the room until their wedding night??)
loveslife Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 Well, I personally think it's very okay to make out without "going all the way." I don't think anyone should do things until/unless they're ready.
Author Awesome84 Posted March 25, 2009 Author Posted March 25, 2009 I agree. Making out is good. On the other hand.. is making out like...'we might as well have sex?" The thing is... I'm trying to do things differently in my life now. I don't want just 'sexual gratification'. I want something deeper. And now is not the right time for us to 'go all the way'. But we are REALLY attracted to eachother. Which is why I don't want to mistake physical attraction for real chemistry.
BubblyPopcorn Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 According to the dictionary, it states: minor intimacies that do not include sex such as kissing, hugging, exploring, touching, and fondling, they may or may not occur prior to, they may or may not lead to sex.
Island Girl Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 Good gosh, I think it is wonderful. Sometimes my BF and I still do just that - and deny ourselves sex - because the kissing is so daggone great. I LOVE making out with him! How is kissing someone and letting them know that you desire them leading them on? Do I have to have sex with every guy I kiss just so that some stupid man doesn't call me a tease? IMO, sex should be special and should be when both partners have discussed it and both want it equally. I agree to all of the above. When my husband and I met we made out for weeks, with the later weeks having some good heavy petting, before we eventually slept together though we were not virgins. Building up anticipation and really learning more about someone before jumping into the sack is a good thing.
samspade Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 Good gosh, I think it is wonderful. Sometimes my BF and I still do just that - and deny ourselves sex - because the kissing is so daggone great. I LOVE making out with him! That is a little bit different if you have already had sex. I've got nothing against making out. But if it's between two people who never have had sex before, then you are raising the intimacy stakes. We both are trying not to 'do it'. If that's the case, and you've discussed it, I don't see a problem with it. I didn't realize you were both on the same page. How is kissing someone and letting them know that you desire them leading them on? Letting them know you desire them by making out, while also having so real intention to fulfill that desire is leading them on, almost by definition. Of course, we've all made out with people that we didn't wind up sleeping with. It's a great test of chemistry and a way to push the intimacy envelope, and yes, build anticipation. But my point was, if you have made up your mind that you're not going to sleep with that person, and he/she does not know this and isn't on the same page, then you are teasing and leading on. I didn't realize the OP and her beau were both on the same page about it. Do I have to have sex with every guy I kiss just so that some stupid man doesn't call me a tease? You don't have to do anything you don't want to do.
Author Awesome84 Posted March 25, 2009 Author Posted March 25, 2009 But my point was, if you have made up your mind that you're not going to sleep with that person, and he/she does not know this and isn't on the same page, then you are teasing and leading on. I agree that THAT is teasing. Totally!
Isolde Posted March 25, 2009 Posted March 25, 2009 It depends on a couple of things. Are you planning on dating this person and having sex at some point? Or are you just getting together every now and then? How hot and heavy is it? IMO, a good rule of thumb is that French kisses aren't teasy as long as they're not really long and as long as there's no groping involved.
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