EX keeps calling! What does she want? What do I say or do?

October 15, 2003

Do any of you have some suggestions on how to deal with the constant thinking and thinking about this issue? For those of you who have gotten through this, what were the things you did to get by?

I can't stop thinking about it -- all day, all the time -- and I'm generally a very easygoing and laid-back person. This is a strange place to be in.

October 17, 2003

Hi Sean

I say go with it & feel it - I dont think you should deal with anything else but this for the time being, if you need to think about it, let yourself do it, if you hide it away, distract yourself etc then you wont get to the end of it - just like jumping into a rebound thing, i think distractions are an emotional sticking plaster that cover things up for the time being, but they will resurface at a later date to bite your backside if you dont get everything you need to do out of the way now. I think of it as development for your soul - forget regrets & bitterness, whats happened will help shape who you are in future, dont wallow in it, think of it as a positive step to get where you need to be - i am learning from my experience, as we all are.

and at the end of this - i want to be able to lie down and say trample me, to the person that wont.

I know everyone is feeling different things albeit within the same parameters, but this is your choice how you deal with this, and you are doing brilliantly. Talk about it, fret, stay awake all night - thats what i have been doing, and its for a reason, never again will i enter into a relationship that i am not sure about, thats soulless, that i am not committed to, in which i take someone for granted. Its my fault i am here, i made the choice to push my ex away and not give him the attention he deserved - and now i am where you are. But thats fine.

Youre thinking about if for a reason - dont blot it out. Its not forever, but it may make forever a nicer place to be.

Good luck, and tip your hat and smile at someone in the street today.

October 18, 2003

Thanks for your kind words, bigbelm

so what happened in your situation? Or did you post that somewhere already?

I've been learning to deal with all my emotions and to get some clarity and perspective. Reading others' stories helps, and the one question I have been wondering this whole time is -- why did I not feel this strongly during the two years we dated? Did I truly think something was amiss in the relationship and I should just leave it alone now because of that?

I never expected the situation to cause so much pain, but I can see that many people have been here before. I don't know if this is the way love should be, or if this is only the way it is where love isn't.

October 18, 2003

Hey, Im not sure if this will help any or if this is the right answer to your question. I tend to stumble around here trying to find answers to my own set of circumstances in other peoples problems. Occasionaly I try to give advice but I pretty much don't live within my words so I don't know how much use it will be.

YOU SAID :::::why did I not feel this strongly during the two years we dated? Did I truly think something was amiss in the relationship and I should just leave it alone now because of that?

Yes, leave it be. My situation is sort of similar in regards to the "Not knowing what you have until its gone" scenario"- well- not really but in some ways it is. Anyways-I've decided that I always knew what I had.....I mean I had it. How could I not know what I had when I had it. Perhaps what I did with it is something to consider-maybe it should of been done different but oh well. I think the real issue is not what you don't have now- Its what it never became.

Your stumbling through life. You have your hopes and your dreams all fit snug into the heavy back pack you've been traveling with. You tired and sore, you occasionally look over at your partner whos been traveling the distance with you. She has a look of anticipation cut into her eyes, a look of dedication and it shows-shes been there for two years. Shes tired, you smile briefly and ask if shes hungry and when she says yes you stop and eat. Then you press on. Then there comes a point where you stop and look back again, .........shes lost a step. You stop and she stops and your eyes meet for the first time in a long while. The inspiration that once held a flame under her feet has seemed to drain her face pale. The dedication that once framed her words seems lazy and weak. A silence falls between you and you know what it means. You look back over your shoulder at the rest of the journey. Its not much further you say, but bye this time words have grown stale and the air is a prison for them to fester in the shallow breaths of communication. Every time you open your mouth a rope is forged and you try to put it around her. You try to imagine what it will be like without her but you can't. And so you sit there, rope in hand, tied down, fastened to the persona of who that person was supposed to be. Fastened to nothing.

Move on.........find a person who is willing to go the distance and let ghost be ghost.

October 19, 2003

I think you have loved her and still do.. She is probably checking you out to see

about you if you are the same self or the new you. It's my guess. U said in the

beginning that she didn't think you are there for her. What happened? You later

said that you did something-poem, etc..& "being there". I think she needs to

see more of you to express out to her..maybe just talk and listen to her as well.

Maybe, try to cooperate or to accept her anyway when you are thinking about

things from yourself. You may not have to prove her from what you have done

to be there for her. It takes a lifetime to be always there for her if you share

yourself as a part of her life.. Talk, ask, & compliment her as usual. Never

close yourself as you appear selfish to her and this may make her feel that

she is not part of your life. Its not the flowers, gifts, poems, or anything like it

to show that you care or you love her. She needs just you. I may be all wrong

about this but you can do something abt her if you know that I may be right.

There's never right or wrong but there's a solution.. May love come to you if

your heart tells you so.. Try to think about youself first though before about

her. Sorry about your situation but I think you just need to explore a bit more

if you still miss her and move on-- Patti

October 19, 2003

Great words, goat! Your story is something else, I have to say. And it rings true for me. So what is yours?

And to slighted -- I completely hear what you are saying. The problem is that there is another man in the picture and I am quite torn between giving continuous expressions of devotion at a time when she is obviously wrapped up in a new situation. It is a very uncomfortable position to be in and may have repercussions that I do not wish to occur.

all I know is that I left the door open upon our last speaking, which was a week ago. I asked if she knew how I felt and she said "yes." I also asked her what I could do and she did not have an answer. So I told her not to call me until she figured it out.

She may never have the courage to tell me the decision I believe she already made, but I think in another week or so I may drop her a note to let her know I want to be here for her. But I won't make any great overtures at this point.

October 19, 2003

Just ask her out to a dinner or a movie.. I understand that youre not comfortable

with the man in her picture. No one owns her if she does or not to

do what she wishes.. She's free to do whatever she wants. She is not married

yet. You can always ask her out or let her know that u want to do something

with her-- perhaps go for a walk or eat out. Ignore the fact that shes "with"

someone else. This other man whoever he is doesn't own her anyway and u

don't own her either..

Before when you ask her to do something with you, tell her respectfully that

you don't want to confuse her or that it doesn't mean you don't care about

her dating this man.. tell her that it doesn't bother you about her date. I think

she will notice something more about you. She will probably feel that you're

only seeing her as herself for who she is and not what she does.. If you love

her so much, I don't think you should worry about her new date at all and you

do what u can-- ask her out or something-- Dont talk about feelings or anything

like it. When she's spenting time with you, just let her know that you will try to

be open to listen to her and will try to talk abt whatever she asks u abt or

something she talks abt. Just tell her you will try to understand her and accept

her in a way.. It's difficult though but let her see that you have the courage to

change and to accept anything or anyone for the better. Notes, phone calls, gifts,

checking each other out doesnt do any good.. Just go ahead like a very first date

with her and don't worry about her new date. Just let her know you respect her

for her new choice but she can still choose you if she wants to. Dont make things

complicated for yourself & for her, okay? Patti

October 19, 2003

thank you for your suggestion.... but let me ask you this -- just one week ago, I told her "don't call me until you figure out what you want... I won't call you... and I'm moving on." Would it seem strange to ask her out after saying that? I mean, is she going to believe anything I say if I change my tune so readily, at least without a longer passage of time? Wouldn't I at least have to bring up the topic by saying something simple like "I miss my friend..." or "I was very hurt at the time I said that"... or something along those lines? sheesh this is so confusing...

I do agree it would be great to spend time without talking about "it" but the problem is that she completely cut off that possibility a few weeks ago... she told me that her new "rule" was "don't see me" and the few times we did speak, it was because she started to cry on the phone and I ran to comfort her (and practically had to twist her arm...)

October 19, 2003

sean, you REALLY need to take Goatsbreath advice, (even if his name is different ). he's giving ya advice, that i came here to give ya. FOR REAL. READ ON AND LEARN...

LOVE IS ABOUT GROWING....THINGS HAPPEN FOR REASONS..

it's true that WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WE HAVE, UNTIL IT'S GONE. i've never experienced this, but sounds like you're going through this now.

LET BYGONES, BE BYGONES..you need to move on and let that girl alone. i mean, what more do you need? for proof that your ex has another life? SHE TOLD YOU THAT SHE HAS ANOTHER MAN...so why's it so hard for you to press forward? leave the past behind and stop stressin'!

BE A MAN, SEAN...YOU CAN DO IT! ask the Lord for strength, b/c this girl has moved on. and so should you.

we keep repeating the same things to you, so it's time for you (sean), to get yourself together...and accept the truth. like i said, love is about growing & learning, PLEASE JUST LEARN FROM THIS, AND BE WISER NEXT GO AROUND..k?

God bless!!

much love to ya, sean..

October 23, 2003

am at work so i cant type much, but Sean, dont give ultimatums or say things that you dont mean. dont say you are moving on if you know fine well you arent, you are adding to your & her confusion. you have to be true to yourself and tell the truth, not necessarily all of it, just dont say things that are untruths.

sorry i didnt reply to your earlier reply, i only just saw it - my story is posted all over the gaff.

and i ended up making a 'i am getting on with my life now, i am not going to contact you again' committment last night, and i really meant it - he said he was confused by by being so upset when we were in contact. and his response was 'nooooooooooo' actually, i am going to post the emails on a new thread, i'd love to hear what you guys think about it.

oh sheet i am supposed to be at work..

October 23, 2003

BIGBELM, I READ YOUR RESPONSE TO SEAN...AND I REALLY THINK THAT YOU'RE WISE..... BY BEING TRUE TO YOURSELF. BECAUSE IF WE KEEP LYING TO OURSELVES, BY SAYING THAT WE'RE MOVING ON...BUT CONTINUE TO STRESS & STAY IN OUR EX'S LIVES..THEN WE'RE JUST LYING TO OURSELVES AND FOOLING OUR OWN SELVES.

SEAN, LIKE BIGBELM SAID...BE TRUE TO YOURSELF, DON'T KEEP LYING TO YOURSELF AND PLAYING THE "FOOL". WHEN WE'RE TRUE TO OURSELVES, OR ANYONE ELSE FOR THAT MATTER...WE'RE SETTING OURSELVES FREE (TO EXPERIENCE THE POSTIVE, AND LEAVING THE NEGATIVE BEHIND)!

BIGBELM, IF I CAN HELP U, I'D LIKE TO READ YOUR COLUMN AND GIVE U SOME ADVICE! WHAT FORUM ARE YOU ON???

HOLLA

October 24, 2003

Hi wise - thanks for your support - am having a bad day today, i feel like the world is over. seeing your reply made me focus on someone else for a moment, blessed relief. the emails i have posted at

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t27542/

iamnotnothing gave me a right flogging for it, bless her. my reply back didnt make any sense i dont think. i didnt contact him last night at all - he texted me and emailed me asking to call but i didnt. this has been going on for 5 weeks now - i have lost 16 pounds and my bones are starting to stick out. I dont think i can cope with this much longer.

sorry for hijacking your post sean - how are you today?

goats - if you continue to write like that, i shall continue to burst into tears at my desk. its very embarrassing.

October 24, 2003

I'm at odds with myself with whether I should tell my girlfriend I'm done waiting for her and I'm moving on or not. Reading your post really kinda stirred things up within. Because I know full well that I WONT be moving on.

s***.

Why does this nonsense have to be so damn hard and painful?

October 24, 2003

oh kevin - its hard hard hard - i so know it. you have to think about your reasons for telling her that - if you hope for a response from her saying no please dont do that - you wont hear what you want to hear - you are setting yourself up for further anguish. even though i did hear my ex say no please dont do that, it hasnt made anything easier so either way, its a dramatic statement that doesnt have the dramatic effect you are looking for.

and you set yourself up for further confusion, when you contact her again because you werent ready to actually move on in the 1st place.

truly listen to what you are thinking, i keep flying into blind panics, and thats when your judgement is at its most clouded. hear yourself and treat yourself with the respect you deserve. dont do anything for effect - do it because you mean it.

October 25, 2003

THIS IS FOR BIGBELM, KEVIN, AND SEAN-

I WANT YOU 3 AMIGOS TO KNOW, THAT IF YOU STAY IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT ISN'T MAKING YOU HAPPY, BUT IS MAKING YOU CONTINOUSLY STRESSED OUT, SAD, DEPRESSED, AND UNFULLIFILLED....THEN I'D THINK IT'S TIME TO ACCEPT*** THAT IT'S TIME TO MOVE ON.

GUYS, I KNOW THAT WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES....BUT IF WE ARE STAYING IN RELATIONSHIPS, JUST B/C EITHER WE THINK WE'RE TOO WEAK TO MOVE ON, OR WE THINK WE CAN'T DO BETTER..THEN WE'RE LOSING OUT ON REAL & TRUE LOVE. FIRST, WE HAVE TO LOVE OURSELVES, IF YOU TAKE TIME "AWAY" FROM THE PERSON WE "THINK" WE LOVE...THEN AND ONLY THEN...CAN WE BE ABLE TO "REFLECT" AND SEE THAT WE AREN'T IN A FULFILLING RELATIONSHIP. IN RELATIONSHIPS, IT TAKES 2 PEOPLE, 50-50....NO ONE PERSON CAN MAKE IT WORK. IT SOUND LIKE TO ME, THAT YOU GUYS ARE THE ONLY ONE'S TRYING TO MAKE IT "RIGHT". THIS AIN'T REAL LOVE. TRUE LOVE IS 2 PEOPLE COMPATIBLE, TRYING TO MAKE IT RIGHT!

IT HAS TO BE 50-50, OR ELSE! DON'T GO FOR LESS, BOYS. BECAUSE IF YALL DO, YOU'RE JUST FOOLING YOURSELVES. DON'T PLAY THE FOOL!

GUYS, I'VE BEEN HURT SO MANY TIMES....BUT NOW, IF I GET INVOLVED WITH A MAN WHO ISN'T TRYING, OR WHO ISN'T WORKING TO MAKE IT RIGHT WITH ME..WELL H*LL, I'M OUT THE DOOR!!! AND YOU GUYS WANT TO KNOW WHY??? BECAUSE I NOW LOVE MYSELF ENOUGH TO KNOW, THAT I ONLY DESERVE THE BEST! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF PEOPLE USING ME, JUST BECAUSE I LET THEM! REMEMBER, PEOPLE ONLY DO TO US, WHAT WE LET THEM. TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR FEELINGS!

AND IF THIS PERSON IS RIGHT FOR ME, (OR IF YOUR LOVER OR EX IS RIGHT FOR YOU), THEN BEST BELIEVE THAT THAT PERSON WILL HAVE A "WAKE UP CALL", AND COME BACK TO YOU READY AND WILLING TO WORK AT A GOOD, MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU!

BUT FIRST, YOU GUYS HAVE TO RESPECT AND LOVE YOURSELVES..STOP PUTTTING EVERYONE ELSE AHEAD OF YOUR NEEDS AND WANTS. ASK GOD FOR STRENGTH TO CONTROL YOURSELF, SO THAT YOU CAN GET SOME "TIME" AND "SPACE" AWAY FROM THE PERSON YOU'RE STRESSING OVER.

AND TAKE ENOUGH TIME AWAY, TO GET YOURSELVES TOGETHER, GET YOUR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT! TAKE TIME AWAY FROM THE PERSON YOU LOVE, SO THAT YOU CAN FIND YOURSELVES...AND SO THAT YOU CAN GAIN ENOUGH STRENGTH TO STAND UP FOR YOURSELF, AND FOR YOUR HEART.

GOOD LUCK GUYS, AND KEEP ME POSTED! LET ME KNOW HOW YOU'RE FEELING AFTER READING THIS.

BIGBELM, REMEMBER THAT WHEN ONE DOOR CLOSES, THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING BETTER AT THE NEXT DOOR. DON'T SETTLE FOR LESS, ONLY GO FOR THE BEST!

SEAN AND KEVIN, YOU CAN DO ANYTHING WITH STRENGTH, ASK GOD FOR STRENGTH, HE'LL GIVE IT TO YOU SO THAT YOU CAN MOVE FORWARD IF YOU HAVE TO. HOLLA & BE TRUE TO YOURSELVES!

October 25, 2003

Cheers luv, i do feel i am a lot more emotionally even now, and i am taking a rather cowardly way out, my ex is making lots & lots of the right sounds, asking me over there, saying what a wonderful effect i have on him, getting excited when we talk about what we are going to do etc but he still doesnt say i love you or i want to be with you. sooo i know i have to be cautious and so on, but to be fair, its easier to deal with currently with this chink of hope. and he IS trying, he tried and tried but it had gone, and for him to give me a chance after its gone, hes got a lot more loyalty than i have ever been able to muster in past relationships, as far as i was concerned, if its gone, its gone - yet he is STILL prepared to try, i am impressed with him actually. and for me to be able to still admire him after all this, its gotta be worth fighting for. he's my hero (swoon). sorry i was being childish then.haha

if i say no more at this stage, i will have to go through the darkest, blackest period again, i so dont want to go back there, its nasty. so if i can get to the end of this, whatever that end may be then its a smoother ride right now. i am well aware that i may end up dealing with this on my own, but the longer it takes, the easier it will be. the overwhelming oh-god-i-want-to-die stage seems to have passed, and if i cut him off now and move on, i will be going straight back there. thats going against all of my own advice because i really wanted to learn everything i could from this, but i am sick of learning now. i dont like it anymore (not that it was great fun in the 1st place) and i just want the pain to go. so effectively, this is the best thing for me at the moment. and if we do work it out, then i'll have an incredible reward, if we dont, i have that reward in the form of a deeper understanding. Would much rather have him, mind.

this is my coping strategy - which keeps changing but as i dont know what

feelings to expect next, i am just going with it.

October 25, 2003

hello bigbelm, i read your post, and it sounds like you truly love this person. so, all i can say...is follow your heart. if this person truly love you, then just be patient with him. he may come to find out, that he love you as much, too.

and if he never give you back in return, the love that you're seeking...then you must move on..knowing that you need as much as you're putting into this relationship. it's easier for some people to show love, than others. so, if this person is right for you, then just give him time.

good luck! holla

October 25, 2003

will do wise - totally agree with you

now where on earth is sean? i want to know whats happening with him

October 25, 2003

I needed that message. I know I need to move on and look towards loving myself for a while and stop investing every thought of every day into what things I can say or do to make things different. My girlfriend used the I need some space and time scenario but then I found out there was another guy in the picture. Then she tells me she still just needs space and time, that she loves me so much, that Im probably her soul mate and she could be making the biggest mistake of her life.

Alls I wanted was the truth about this other guy and she kept feeding me bits and pieces of hope and covering up all her daggers with lies. Then I would find out she was with him and so on on numerous occasions. I would say, "please- break up with me- we've been together 5 years- you owe me a honest answer of what your doing. I would even try to say I would understand if you want to see other people but don't be a coward and lead me on- let me make my choice based on truths- not your storys. Still- she would say "I dont know what Im doing, I dont know what I want, I dont know why I hurt you, I do know I love you."

Anyway, this has been the case for 3 or so months now and tonight on the phone I told her that I have grown to hate her. Then she hung up the phone on me. I feel I have hopped around this website looking for answers on how to approach her and I think I have tried every angle. Only after do I realize it was the wrong angle. Yes-I am guilty of the " well, Im moving on then," line. Unfortunately, I think I have exhausted all the possible ways to deal with the situation.

Whats worse, In truth- I dont think I could take her back if she came to me. Somehow I got caught up in all the games and lies she kept dealing me. I like became some dectective guy or something always looking for her to slip up so I could uncover another lie. I dont know why. I guess for the last month or so after doing all these things and approaching the situation from so many different angles I stoped and said what the hell am I doing? What am I really persueing? Do I really want her back? Is this what this is about? I dont think it is. Instead- I think it became a struggle for control. I needed to feel some control over the break up and still I hold none because of yesterday-

Yesterday I caught her over there and I pretty much just walked into his house. She was laying on the couch. I was so shocked- she was shocked. Then she looks at me- this other guy is standing in the kitchen. Shes looks sad, "Im sorry" she says almost in tears," I guess I made my choice." So, I say a few words and just look at her and then turn around to leave. She says wait. Then she tells me I look really pale and we should go talk. I say whats there to talk about- youve finally given me your answer- the truth is finally out. She says lets go talk- I have some stuff of yours, so I say fine. We leave and she says shes sorry and dont know what shes doing again. Im like- hello, you just said you guess you made your choice while you are laying on this guys couch. She actually says this back to me, "I said I guess," as if to underline guess, "I still don't know." Can you believe that. I couldn't. Anyway- I agree to go talk and we end up sleeping together last night for the first time in almost 2 months. I should of left when I was standing there wathing her face turn into tears on his couch.

Last night I lost control when I could of taken it. She has twisted me into something I dont care to look upon. Tonight, all the anger and rage that consumed me when I seen her on his couch came rushing back. She kept it down after seducing me for one night, but tonight i told her that I hated her. Its all I have left.

October 26, 2003

HOW ARE YOU, BIGBELM? CAN U BELIEVE THAT LAST NIGHT, I WROTE A LONGGG NOTE TO YOU..AND MY COMPUTER JUST FROZE!!! I LOST THE DATA, I WAS PISSED

HMMMMM, so..here goes again

i read your forum, and i need you to ask yourself this one question--WHAT ARE YOU WORTH???

do you deserve someone who continously lies to you, 2-times you, and hurts you??? i'd think the answer is NO! bigbelm, i think that now, you're realizing that you've been wasting your time with this one. this lady doesn't care about your feelings, she's lying to you while giving her love to another man! so, if you keep chasing after this skank, then you're just continously hurting yourself, and fooling yourself.

this lady, is confused her own self. she told you that she isn't sure of what she wants, right??? bigbelm, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP? DO YOU WANT THE SAME HONESTY AND LOVE, THAT YOU'RE DISHING OUT?

OR DO YOU WANT TO GIVE 50%, AND GET 10% BACK, THE WAY YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY DOING WITH THIS WOMAN? remember bigbelm, that we can't change people, they have to choose to change themselves. and if they don't change for us, we must move on to protect our OWNSELVES. you do the math.

bigbelm, i left a man who decided that he wasn't "ready" for a relationship with me, and he decided this after we we're getting so close. i thought it was going good, but he just shut me out all of a sudden! so, you know what i did? i didn't procrastinate, because i'm not giving my love to someone who admits, that he isn't ready for it. i'd be playing "the fool", b/c he'd just walk all over me, IF I LET HIM. people only do to us, what we LET THEM. so, now this man is out of my life..because i KNEW what I wanted....i wasn't worried a/b his wants/needs, only MINE. I LOVE MYSELF, AND I'M NOT PUTTING MYSELF 2ND, ON NO MANS LIST...IF I'M NOT FIRST, THEN I'M OUT THE DOOR.

that's the way you need to become to this lady, bigbelm, forget listening to what 'SHE WANTS AND WHAT SHE'S NEEDING', put yourself first and do what's best for YOU! and if she's the lady for you, if she finds that you're the man she want to be with...then i promise you that she'll come running back to you..ready and willing to go 50-50(if it isn't too late, you may have moved on, and if so, her loss)! but you need to ask yourself that one question, WHAT ARE YOU WORTH??

DO YOU DESERVE MORE OR LESS, IN A RELATIONSHIP?

holla and REFLECT

October 26, 2003

blimey - will read all the above and then reply properly. deep breath...

October 26, 2003

I have to say wise, you lost me with that one, but it did make me laugh - was it for goats? and may i add, totally not a laughing matter i know. my ex is a fella not a boid, & he hasnt 2 timed me thank god.

goats, your situation completely sucks, without wishing to state the obvious. i completely agree with wise on this, and with you yourself, you know whats the best thing for you, you know how to deal with this and whats going on here. and even when you are asking if this is what you want, you know the answer to your own questions

you do have control over this, you have absolute control over how you act and what you do, and the compliance of your feelings follows that. she hasnt done this to you, the fact that you still love her has meant you are allowing this to be done to you. make your decision goats, believe that you dont need her or want her and the rest will follow in time.

leave the hate behind you, you dont need it bebe. you have very much impressed me with some of your posts, you have plenty left.

October 26, 2003

GOATS, I MADE A MISTAKE WITH YOUR NAMES! THE NOTE I WROTE TO BIGBELM, IS FOR YOU, I PUT HIS NAME MEANING YOU...I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING BUT I GOT YOUR NAMES MIXED UP!

SORRY, GOATS PLS READ THE NOTE THAT I WROTE, WITH BIGBELM NAME ON IT...I MEANT TO PUT "GOATSBREATH"..(I'M TRIPPIN')

October 26, 2003

Ha ha, that was funny. Wiseluv was sort of on the middle line with your situation Bigbelm until reading my post and mistaking it for yours. Then it was off to the races, gloves are coming off, straighten up girl- smack! Sometimes thats what you need though, someone to be real when you can't make up and down of the situation. Thanks for your words Wiseluv, you to Bigbelm. I know you are both saying the right things, and like you said, I know the right thing. I guess its just time to take it in and make it my own, except the situation for what it is. For a long time its been- how can this be happening to us? Its us! I look at her and she looks at me and its just there, something is there but then she takes her mask off or something when she leaves my house. I dont know.

So, I was sort of wondering what happened to sean. I was sort of following his progress. Hmm. Well, cheers to brighter days all.......

October 26, 2003

hey guys, where's sean?? i'm wondering about him, too. bigbelm, i'm glad that you READ me right on my last note to goats...i guess i was mixed up with the names

i'm like you, bigbelm...i wasn't 2-timed while i was with the gorgeous man that i had to leave, (i have a friend who works with him, who know's he hasn't been 2-timing me), so...he just wanted time because he's been hurt alot. and i'm the strong type, i love to be loved and to give love! to the right guy, of course .

bigbelm, i'm glad that your guy isn't seeing anyone else, that helps to understand them. if my guy decides that he's ready to trust and really love again, i'd take him back in a heartbeat! he's been thru a hurtful divorce, she hurt him. plus, his parent and buddy died..he's going through that. but i have to protect myself, by leaving. i was there during his loss, but afterwards he acted afraid to continue our relationship..so i left, so that he can see what it is he really wants. if it's me, then he'll come back a changed man. if he doesn't come back, then i'm just continuing forward. for me!

so, GOATS...this lady 2-timing ya isn't worth it, she'll probably be a 2-timer, until you leave and let her reflect on what it is that she really wants. and goats, if it's you that she wants..then she'll come to you ready or a 2nd chance, she'll be 4 real this time! so, leave her and go on with your life..there's other fish in the sea who isn't afraid to be true to you! HOLLA (i got the names right, huh guys???)

Sign In

EX keeps calling! What does she want? What do I say or do?

Recommended Posts

sean001

NatoPMT

sean001

Goatsbreath

Slightedhurt

sean001

Slightedhurt

sean001

wiseluv34

NatoPMT

wiseluv34

NatoPMT

UCFKevin

NatoPMT

wiseluv34

NatoPMT

wiseluv34

NatoPMT

Goatsbreath

wiseluv34

NatoPMT

NatoPMT

wiseluv34

Goatsbreath

wiseluv34

What's New

My Activity Streams

More...