Author DunnoWhat Posted April 2, 2009 Author Posted April 2, 2009 I've checked. Facebook updated over 2 weeks ago which means she had plenty of time to learn it. Shes on it every day and few times a day. I think you're being over- paranoid about this. Why are you questioning her character when you've been with her for over a year? If you believe she's being unfaithful then just confront her on the subject. Might as well just tell her you don't want to be with her because your doubts the only thing causing a rift in the relationship. I don't believe shes being unfaithful. I know she's in love with me but I'm still wondering why she wouldn't let me see her profile. What was she hiding. I know shes not cheating so maybe she thought I'd be disappointed to see something..
xpaperxcutx Posted April 2, 2009 Posted April 2, 2009 I've checked. Facebook updated over 2 weeks ago which means she had plenty of time to learn it. Shes on it every day and few times a day. I don't believe shes being unfaithful. I know she's in love with me but I'm still wondering why she wouldn't let me see her profile. What was she hiding. I know shes not cheating so maybe she thought I'd be disappointed to see something.. Your behavior and doubt says otherwise. Why are you so concerned about what's on her site? I could care less if my SO were to even have one. The purpose of social networking is to get in touch with friends and family, who aren't around as much. Shouldn't you already feel happy that you get to have such a wonderful girlfriend and that she always MSN you or whatever? Just because you feel like she stalled in her reply does not necessarily mean she did it on purpose.
jadelil25 Posted April 2, 2009 Posted April 2, 2009 This seems quite suspicous to me. If she has been with you a year and has nothing to hide then she should not have a reason with you being friends on her profile. She may not have done it that night because you kept nagging her to do it but she should have accpeted it the day after on when she was next on there. I know the lay out has changed but it is still clear to see a friend request on your home page and you also get an email to your personal email letting you know that there is a request. I would leave it a week and if she does not accept it, just sit down face to face with her and have a grown up conversation and just ask her once if she has a problem with you being her friend on there and if so why?
Author DunnoWhat Posted April 2, 2009 Author Posted April 2, 2009 I know the lay out has changed but it is still clear to see a friend request on your home page and you also get an email to your personal email letting you know that there is a request. I would leave it a week and if she does not accept it, just sit down face to face with her and have a grown up conversation and just ask her once if she has a problem with you being her friend on there and if so why? She had over 10 min to find it and she was already familiar with facebook. She accepted me as a friend first thing the next morning. I'm just wondering why she stalled. Your behavior and doubt says otherwise. Why are you so concerned about what's on her site? I could care less if my SO were to even have one. The purpose of social networking is to get in touch with friends and family, who aren't around as much. Shouldn't you already feel happy that you get to have such a wonderful girlfriend and that she always MSN you or whatever? Just because you feel like she stalled in her reply does not necessarily mean she did it on purpose. I know shes not cheating or anything. I'm wondering what was she hiding though. It could have been embarrassing pictures or something. I am grateful to have her but she definetly did stall me. That is 100% a fact so now I'm wondering why.
Author DunnoWhat Posted April 3, 2009 Author Posted April 3, 2009 I mentioned it to her but she denied everything. So I'm more suspicious then ever now.
xpaperxcutx Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 I mentioned it to her but she denied everything. So I'm more suspicious then ever now. You're not really for advice. You're looking for validation that she did something wrong. Either get over it or break up with her. You're making it something out of nothing.
pollywag Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 Its strange because she uses facebook every day and takes quizes and does some games on it. So she definetly didn't forget her password. She told me before to that shes good at remembering numbers. She also said that she didn't know where the button was to add a friend. She seems to know every other button. She said facebook was different (They must have upgraded it). So does anybody know when did facebook change? She also had almost 6 minutes to find it! :laugh: "Couldn't find the add friend button"? Your friend is FULL of crap, such lame excuses. FB has changed but not in that respect it is still super straight forward to add friends, they person pops up who wants to be added and you say add or ignore. It is NOT rocket science. She is clearly hiding something but I think it's best for you at this point you let it go. Whatever it was she was trying to avoid you looking at is now safely gone and for all you know it could have been something that was embarrassing to her and not necessarily something that was incriminating in terms of your relationship together.
pollywag Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 I mentioned it to her but she denied everything. So I'm more suspicious then ever now. The problem with having all our private lives displayed online for everyone to see is that it tends to make liars out the best of us. People sometimes say and do things on FB between friends that should be kept between friends, there is probably little interest in showing a new love interest how we interact with our close friends if we really let our guards down. Before online social applications what we discussed and how we joked around with friends was strictly between you and your friend, your significant other didn't get the privilege of seeing you and how you relate to your mates 24/7. Now people divulge every single last little detail about themselves online and then when a love interest comes into the picture all the tracks have to be retraced to make sure there is nothing incriminating about them. My personal rule of thumb is, don't post, say or do anything on FB that you will regret saying some day. When you say something in real life it's said and it's gone forever, but when you write or do things online it is there attached to your name and face for eternity. I see it as potential employers, friends, and romantic interests could be watching so I would act no differently than I would in real life in any social situation. If you adhere to that simple rule you will never have to backtrack and think about what you did online. This is probably what's happened with your friend.
Mary3 Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 The one red flag here is you said you could see 2 or 3 male friends as friends and the next day you could see NONE. Now she either hid them ( I don't really use my facebook account often ) so the FB users can enlighten me....but then you said you COULD see the friends magically appear back on the page the next time you viewed it. Despite all here I say she was stalling like H***.. Now your bigger problem is that you confronted her with your fears . I suspect your R is going to be in big trouble. She is either a liar, sneak and cheat or shes NOT. Being accused of any of these being can result in the end.
Author DunnoWhat Posted April 3, 2009 Author Posted April 3, 2009 The one red flag here is you said you could see 2 or 3 male friends as friends and the next day you could see NONE. Now she either hid them ( I don't really use my facebook account often ) so the FB users can enlighten me....but then you said you COULD see the friends magically appear back on the page the next time you viewed it. Despite all here I say she was stalling like H***.. Now your bigger problem is that you confronted her with your fears . I suspect your R is going to be in big trouble. She is either a liar, sneak and cheat or shes NOT. Being accused of any of these being can result in the end. You actually reminded me of something. I can still see the male friends. However I've just remembered something. When she first told me about her having facebook it was about 1 month before we became a couple. A few months after we became a couple I googled it. When you google it what you usually see is the person and a few friends next to the persons name. I've just remembered a guy who was her friend months ago who is not there now. Also before when i googled her name I could see her friends. The last month or so when I done it I could see no friends. I googled my profile and could see my friends except her! So she's been changing her privacy settings for some reason. I'm not a paranoid person but when you know somebody is definetly hiding something you want to find out. It'd be foolish not to. I didn't even ask her about the guy friends she has. :laugh: "Couldn't find the add friend button"? Your friend is FULL of crap, such lame excuses. FB has changed but not in that respect it is still super straight forward to add friends, they person pops up who wants to be added and you say add or ignore. It is NOT rocket science. She seems to have mastered the privacy settings.. The problem with having all our private lives displayed online for everyone to see is that it tends to make liars out the best of us. People sometimes say and do things on FB between friends that should be kept between friends, there is probably little interest in showing a new love interest how we interact with our close friends if we really let our guards down. Before online social applications what we discussed and how we joked around with friends was strictly between you and your friend, your significant other didn't get the privilege of seeing you and how you relate to your mates 24/7. Now people divulge every single last little detail about themselves online and then when a love interest comes into the picture all the tracks have to be retraced to make sure there is nothing incriminating about them. My personal rule of thumb is, don't post, say or do anything on FB that you will regret saying some day. When you say something in real life it's said and it's gone forever, but when you write or do things online it is there attached to your name and face for eternity. I see it as potential employers, friends, and romantic interests could be watching so I would act no differently than I would in real life in any social situation. If you adhere to that simple rule you will never have to backtrack and think about what you did online. This is probably what's happened with your friend. I think it's something like that. She won't tell me so I'll have to presume it was innocent (to her). She knows I have high standards and any flirting with guys won't be tolerated. I don't know if it's best to keep it in or demand answers. She knows I know something so maybe that might scare her into behaving more appropiately. What this has ment though is I don't trust her as much as before. It's sad really but I can't fool myself into thinking nothing happened. Thanks for all your responces. Hope I didn't make people too paranoid about their partners being on facebook.
Mary3 Posted April 3, 2009 Posted April 3, 2009 For all purposes lets assume Myspace and Facebook are pretty similar : Alot of people post their daily lives on there. Their new relationships and blogs , friends , trips , ect. I think your girl is monkeying with your head. If her page is visited by her daily then she DID have time to say she was in a relationship with you ONE year ago. She did NOT say that because she did not want the men on there to know she was in ONE. She never invited you to be on her page , never put pictures of you on her page . She hid facts from you. Do you have a right to be suspicious ? Absolutely. If she never cared about her page and rarely visited it , then that would be a different story. If its no big deal then its no big deal . But to her its part of her identity to post her life on there. She is playing with your head. You can be quiet but the ugly truth will fester up sometime later.
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