Am I immature thinking I can fall in love and find my soul mate at the age of 17?

[theraven]

I have been dating this girl for almost 2 years now... We are both juniors in high school. I know I'm young, but i strongly feel like this girl is the one I'm supposed to grow old with. BUT I'm not gonna lie, I have doubts sometimes. I wonder if I should stick with this relationship OR should I end it and start dating again and have some fun while I'm still in high school? Sometimes I see us getting married, and sometimes I see us breaking up either in high school or college. What I don't want to happen is stay in this relationship then get to college and it not work out. I will regret staying in it in high school and not dating around. Any advice on what I should do?

[samspade]

You have a lot of great dating experience ahead of you, especially if you will be headed to college. Enjoy what you have, but accept that you are young and will experience love and heartbreak more than a few times.

 

The "soul mate" idea is superstition. Ever wonder why most "soul mates" speak the same language and grew up within 500 miles of each other? You're going to meet a lot of women who seem cosmically compatible with you. Give yourself a little credit, it's probably because of your charm.

[Lizzie60]

aahhhh this is sooo cute..only 17 and thinking you found your soulmate.

 

BUT no you didn't...

 

Mark my words.. in 5 years (maybe less) she'll be history...

 

Come on dude.. have fun.. don't regret not having live your 'youth' to the fullest....

[Cherry Blossom 35]

Like Sam said, enjoy what you have now and look forward to the future. Who knows what will happen with this girl. Some people meet in high school, get married, and live happily ever after. Some meet in high school, get married, realize that they never lived life and that they don't have anything in common with their SO, and get divorced. Some people have beautiful relationships in high school, go to college, meet amazing women, and realize they have changed and the don't want the high school girl anymore.

 

You have your whole life ahead of you. Enjoy the possibilities.

[theraven]

Also, something I should add: I really felt that she is the one for me. I'm not into drinking or drugs and neither is she. I mean, I don't care about a little drinking here and there, but I hate the going out and getting drunk every weekend thing. I feel like she is the only one in my town that is freaking gorgeous and doesn't go out getting wasted every weekend. I feel like if I let her go, I PROBABLY won't find someone that would even be close to replacing her. That' just another little reason why I'm confused about this situation..

[Cherry Blossom 35]

Do you live in a small town? Are you going away to college or staying there?

 

Don't stay with someone because you are afraid you won't find someone else. You have LOADS of time to find a great girl.

 

And you don't know that she is done with you. Maybe she is just needing some space right now.

 

You are 17!!!! OMG!!!!! So much life ahead of you. You will find the right one for you.

[theraven]

I do live in a small town... It's in southeast Texas and has a population of about 45,000. I go to a highschool with about 3,500 people, but I guarentee you 60% of them are hispanic and about 30% of the other 40% do drugs or get wasted every weekend. It's definitely not a "clean" school. And I do actually plan on attending the community college in our town. My family or I don't exactly have the money to send me straight to UT, so I will have to be attending the community college for probably 2 years. That means I still have 4 years left in this town :/

[smile123]

So I am fairly new to this website, but I've been reading through a lot of these posts, and yours definitely sparked my interest. I was actually in the same situation as you a couple of years ago. My current boyfriend and I started dating when we were 16 years old, and by the time college rolled around we had almost been dating for 2 years. I was having some of the same thoughts as you such as, should we break up? shoild i end it and start dating again to enjoy my youth? However, I soon realized that I truly did love my boyfriend, and we had so much in common and such a great deal of fun together that it wouldn't be worth it to end something so amazing. We are now going on 4 years of dating, and we are still extremely in love and happy. I understand that we are still young, but as of right now we are very happy, so why worry about the future? If you decide to go off to college still with this girl (which I suggest you do if you are happy with her), I'll admit that you are both going to change and it's going to be difficult to adjust. However, you may change for the better (which is what happened with my boyfriend and I) and realize that you love your girlfriend even more. I have come to find that my boyfriend and I have both matured a great deal and we're happier than ever together. So, I'm sorry for the long post, but I just wanted to tell you my story and let you know that there is hope for relationships lasting and that you should definitely stick with it if you feel she is what you want and that you are truly, 100% happy. I hope this helps, and good luck!

[Cherry Blossom 35]

I do live in a small town... It's in southeast Texas and has a population of about 45,000. I go to a highschool with about 3,500 people, but I guarentee you 60% of them are hispanic and about 30% of the other 40% do drugs or get wasted every weekend. It's definitely not a "clean" school. And I do actually plan on attending the community college in our town. My family or I don't exactly have the money to send me straight to UT, so I will have to be attending the community college for probably 2 years. That means I still have 4 years left in this town :/

 

There will be people at the community college who feel the same way as you. Get involved in campus life, get yourself out there, and it will happen.

 

Don't think that you are just "wasting time" until you go to 4 year university. You don't know how many great people you can meet and great experiences you can have right where you are right now.

 

BTW, going to community college for a couple of years is a great economical way to start your college career. Get good grades and transfer your junior year to the school of your choice. Take advantage of it

[smile123]

Oh, and also, neither my boyfriend or I drinks, smokes, does drugs, or anything of that sorts, so I can definitely see where you're coming from feeling that everyone is involved with that type of thing. To be honest with you, about 95% of students drink in college (ranging from a little to a LOT), and I have only met one male that is not involved in these activities. Due to this, I feel so fortunate that I met my current boyfriend because we have so much fun together without any of the "normal" activities kids are involved in.

[theraven]

Thanks, smile123!!! Haha don't worry about the long post... I would definitely prefer a long one than a short one. You definitely did help me with this. I love hearing stories like mine cause it gives me hope. And yes, we both plan on attending out community college first then attending the University of Texas.

 

It's just really weird. Sometimes, I'm super confident we could make it all the way, but sometimes I'm super confident that it's gonna go down the drain. That's why I get confused with this whole situation

[LovieDove24]

The statistics are against you, BUT its possible that you two are the exception. Very unlikely but possible indeed. You'd have to explain more about your relationship for anyone to be able to give you a reliable answer.

[IcemanJB]

I agree with getting the credits to transfer to a university.

 

People change a great deal during college. I'm about to graduate, and I look back over the past 4 years and realize how much my friends, the girls I've dated, and myself have changed SO much. Trust me, I found this out the hard way with the last girl I dated. She's right in the middle of the whole figuring out what she wants to study, who she wants to be, blah blah. I've noticed most of the girls here around that age going through the exact same thing; just something to watch out for. It's an exciting/stressful/rollercoaster of a ride.

 

But if you two are truly happy with each other, just keep at it and see how things go into college.

[LovieDove24]

Ooh I just found a good website on the relation of age and marriage. Check it out:

 

http://www.mynippon.com/dreamland/marriage-age.htm

[theraven]

I'll try to explain our relationship as best as possible. If I miss something and you have any questions, just ask away (:

 

So we have been dating for exactly 20 months. We did break up once for two weeks... We actually called it a "break" but its all the same thing. That was about 13-14 months in to out relationship, so we have been dating 6 months since that happened.

We are both strong Christian people, though we DO have sex :/ That's really the only "bad" thing we do. We just felt we were in love and should be able to have sex.

She plays softball, I play baseball both at our high schools

The first year of our relationship, I literally don't think we fought ONCE!!! But ever since then, we do tend to get in a lot of dumb fights. Nothing serious, but yeah...

 

That's really all I can think of. I know it's not much, but if you have any questions, just ask..

[theraven]

Thanks, IceMan... I'm definitely leaning toward staying with it. I mean, I've always been leaning towards that, I've just had those doubts ya know? But I definitely would love nothing more than to be with this girl for a longggg time

[samspade]

About the whole drinking/drugs thing: A person's values change, sometimes drastically, after high school. A lot of people I know who were straight arrows in h.s. became stoners in college (and not necessarily worse for it).

 

Enjoy what you got...but remember, embrace change.

[Cherry Blossom 35]

About the whole drinking/drugs thing: A person's values change, sometimes drastically, after high school. A lot of people I know who were straight arrows in h.s. became stoners in college (and not necessarily worse for it).

 

Enjoy what you got...but remember, embrace change.

 

And let me tell you...after reconnecting with high school friends on Facebook, I can't tell you how many people who were big partiers (drinking, drugs) are now COMPLETELY opposite.

 

People change.

[theraven]

This is for LovieDove, or really anyone I guess... Just a little info about our realationship:

 

I'll try to explain our relationship as best as possible. If I miss something and you have any questions, just ask away (:

 

So we have been dating for exactly 20 months. We did break up once for two weeks... We actually called it a "break" but its all the same thing. That was about 13-14 months in to out relationship, so we have been dating 6 months since that happened.

We are both strong Christian people, though we DO have sex :/ That's really the only "bad" thing we do. We just felt we were in love and should be able to have sex.

She plays softball, I play baseball both at our high schools

The first year of our relationship, I literally don't think we fought ONCE!!! But ever since then, we do tend to get in a lot of dumb fights. Nothing serious, but yeah...

 

That's really all I can think of. I know it's not much, but if you have any questions, just ask..