smoot Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 I'm so angry. On 3 separate occasions my husband and I were out and he was approached by three different women (on separate occasions) who were all very friendly and flirty with him in front of me. Each of these times, he didn't introduce me. Just said a quick hello and smiled very sheepishly at them. Then, when I would get angry, he'd turn to me and laugh and say I was crazy for being so jealous. The first time it happened, I went into a fit of rage as he accused me of being insecure. So, I thought, maybe it was me and let it go. The second time, same thing only I decided to calmly explain that I didn't appreciate these actions and asked him to stop. After a long drawn out row, (where he told me I was insecure again) he told me he would stop. The 3rd time, was the last time for me as I angrily told him that I didn't appreciate him making a fool out of me any longer. I gave him an ultimatum-either act like a husband or get out. It's not so much the flirting that pissed me off, he is attractive and it will happen-it's the fact that he knows how I feel and keept doing it and blatantly laughed at me. Something in me snapped this time.(I have gone through alot with him, moving countries to be with him and then the biggest one is that we suffered a miscarriage. He is the last person that I expect to be like this especially since I have discussed these issues with him at length-he just chooses to be childish). I'm on the brink of packing it all up and leaving. Please help me figure this out. I'm hurting.
Lizzie60 Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 he was approached by three different women (on separate occasions) who were all very friendly and flirty with him in front of me. Each of these times, he didn't introduce me. Just said a quick hello and smiled very sheepishly at them. Humm... from what I read here.. he's not the one flirting.. but he's getting hit on by these women.. Leave him at home.. hahaha
2sure Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 I understand your frustration. My H has kind of a high profile postition, deals with the public, meets a lot of people. Also, he is good looking and charming. I am used to women flirting with him and 99% of the time, it doesnt bother me at all. In fact, I'm sure he enjoys it and I can say good for him because.... When we were engaged he did to me what your H did you. Twice. I hit the roof, put my foot down just like you have. The difference is that my H understood and knew it had NOTHING to do with insecurity, jealousy, or the flirting. It was all about his respect for me. Since then, he ALWAYS introduces me. Its important.
angie2443 Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 If you have no children, divorce and move on. Life is to short for this. Find someone who will respect your feelings on this.
carhill Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 OP, got any male friends? If so, give H a little demonstration. How long have you been married and how is the rest of the M? As you know, it's rarely about the flirting.
JackJack Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 You're not the one that is really insecure here...its him. Most people who flirt like that or even if he likes it and accepts the flirting that others are doing, then its because he feels he needs to either do that or accept what others are doing to him because it makes him feel good, its an ego boost. The bottom line here is, he is married, and he has put your feelings on the issue off, and made you feel you're the one insecure. If he has a wandering eye or likes the attention others can provide him with, and disregards your feelings, then you don't really need him.
Lizzie60 Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 Maybe the women know your husband very well.. that's why he was smiling sheepishly..
Lucky_One Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 I had the same thought as Lizzie. Sounds like your husband knew these women already - a little too well - and that he surely wasn't going to introduce you to them. But maybe I am reading the situations all wrong, because you really don't post much detail. Were you in a club? Waiting for a table at a restaurant? At church? At a work function? Did he talk to them for a few minutes, or did he brush them away really quickly? Was he flirting back, and if so, how? Did he know them, or were they total strangers? Were they wearing really really short skirts and lucite heeled sandals and way too much make-up?
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