Girlygirl1977 Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 Ok, I guess an example would be two weeks ago. He spent the entire weekend with me. It was awesome. He came over Friday night, stayed all day saturday, we went out to eat twice that day--breakfast and dinner--spent the night Saturday night(after buying a toothbrush to keep at my house), left Sunday around 2pm. At that point, I thought things were going really well. I thought *maybe* I'd see him Tuesday(that was another day off for me), but he was busy. That was ok. He doesn't come online for a few days. I was fine, I figured I'd see him Friday. He texts me Friday night, I respond to him asking him what he's up too--fully expecting at that point to see him either that night or over the weekend. He doesn't reply to me, but he texts me at 2am(while I was asleep). I text him back Saturday, he doesn't reply or come online all weekend. I was a bit disappointed because I'd expected to see him sometime over the weekend--by this point I'd not seen him since the previous Sunday, so it'd been a week. So he comes online Sunday night and we have a really good convo, he's playful, upbeat. I ask him to come over Monday(this being the last time I saw him), he agrees and brings over the food like I mentioned earlier, makes dinner, we have the sleep over--then he took off. So I was a little concerned that he didn't talk to me or make any attempt to see me last weekend, but I thought Monday had made up for it--until he stopped coming online and responding to me and making no attempt to see me since then. My guess, he either met someone or made progress with someone else either last weekend(and Monday was some guilt-visit) or on St. Patty's Day(Tuesday) that caused him to withdraw from me without a word. He still hasn't contacted me--remember now that intially we spoke *daily* and he'd always respond to me, so 5-6 days with nothing is a big change, it's not just in my head. Also keep in mind that all these days he didn't make it online to talk to me, he did indeed make it on Match.com and Facebook--every.single.day. I agree with your conclusion - he is either no longer interested or met someone else. Match.com makes it very easy and you noticed that he was on it regularly during this period. I also think that's a reason not to become invested to early frankly. . . there is no original context when you meet someone there and you know they are generally on the hunt and the fact that there are so many prospects makes some men/women keep thinking they will meet a better one. Also some men use it really just for sex. I would make sure to improve your social life, widen your circle of friends, and make efforts to meet new people generally. Even if they are new friends, they will have friends etc. Do not rely solely on online dating. I just don't think it is wise. You can use it on the side but make real life your main way to meet people. Often when people use match they decrease or reduce their real life social life or make less effort. Also it sounds like you were initiating a lot of contact? You mentioned that he would always respond. . . the last couple of interactions it sounds like you asked him to come over. Did you see him proactively initiating the daily conversations and inviting you towards the end? These can be clues too as perhaps he was on the way out even earlier, but since you initiated things as far as meeting up and contacting him it went a bit longer. I would make sure you are not doing most of initiating generally too - for the next guy.
socialight Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 >>I logged on WoW(online game), he's already on. Another poster beat me to this. But consider the following -- the guy has IM access, plays WoW, and met you through Match.com. And we wonder why the communication / relationship skills are baffling / missing? You either got blown off or, worse, dumped by a guy who wants to kill orcs or something. Get off the damn internet and go meet a real guy in the real world.
D-Lish Posted March 23, 2009 Posted March 23, 2009 So he logged on AIM again today, still didn't talk to me. I logged on WoW(online game), he's already on. He doesn't say anything to me so after awhile I just say "hi". He responds with a short greeting. I ask him how his weekend is going, he doesn't answer me so after awhile I just log off. I was still on AIM though but he didn't try to talk to me on there either, didn't invite me to do anything tonight like he normally would have since I only get every other weekend off and this is my off weekend... He ditched me. Must have found someone else. :/ I think something came up and he moved on without having the decency to talk to you about it. It's possible he was multi-dating, or just decided the relationship wasn't right for him. One thing I've learned over the years is that trying to figure out what goes on in other peoples heads is a lost cause. You've given it two tries and he's been elusive both times. It's time to move on to the next one.
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